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Nitpicks [85-86 Season]

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Episode 192: Rock Bottom, Part One

- Let's see. First, there's the usual beginning-of-season nonsense. On the way home from the hospital, Pam, Sue Ellen, and Donna decided to get their hair done. Ellie mercifully decided to get her plastic surgery undone [and her old wardrobe back]. And Charlie took massive doses of human growth hormone - she's almost as tall as Jenna now, and she's got hair like Crystal Gayle!

- Everybody noticed that Southfork has undergone substantial remodeling while the troop was away at the hospital. Suddenly, the den has a small room connected to it with blue paint. The upstairs hallway looks different, and Anne noticed a door on the wall with the drinks' table.

- At the funeral, Miss Ellie says she'll take John Ross home while JR talks to the departed Bobby. Wait a minute: shouldn't this be something that Sue Ellen should do? After all, she is the boy's mother.

AHN Bill pointed out that when Ellie is sitting at her desk writing her "to do" list for the next day, she tells Clayton that she "couldn't sleep".. doesn't that mean that she'd have to have been in bed for at least a little while? And most likely out of her clothes and into a nightgown or something? I think 'couldn't sleep' is just an excuse to make Clayton get her some cocoa and answer the phone.

AHN Anne's corner:

- When Christopher runs over to Miss Ellie, he's so thrilled to see her, and then just walks away. It's like the second after he hugged her he said to himself, "Okay, that's enough of Grandma for now." It's not as if she's there everyday! When I see my grandparents, I'm ecstatic. Agreed. This was ridiculous.

- In her grief, Miss Ellie is just a tad demanding of everyone. "J.R., pour me a brandy." "I guess I would like some cocoa." Sheesh! Get it yourself! Then when the phone rang with Gary on the other end of the line, she just kind of looked at Clayton as if to say, "Um, the phone's ringing. Pick up! Why else are you here?" :) I only noticed because you brought it up, and it is very silly. But I'll forgive BBG because she came back and there'll be no more Donna Reed forever!

- Jenna was not so worked up that she needed a sedative, do you think? It's like Harlan was just asking around if anyone wanted a quick fixer-upper. Maybe the Ewings get special privileges on that front, too.

AHN Bill's corner:

- AHN Bill and I both wondered why Southfork cocoa gets cold so quickly. Ellie was only talking to Gary for a minute or two and suddenly she decides that her cocoa is cold. Maybe she feels that Clayton hasn't done enough and he should go downstairs and do it right this time!

- I wondered why Lucy "can't get a plane in time for Bobby's funeral"?  Bobby saved her life (in the first rerun episode I ever watched where she runs away) and other than Ellie, Bobby was the only one alive that ever really was behind her all the time.  she's not on a honeymoon, mind you (shouldn't she be?) .. the excuse is "she couldn't get a flight on time".. give me a break.. a Ewing could have a limo take her from Atlanta to Dallas in 6 hours and leave a damned good tip for the driver as well.. and don't several days go by before the funeral anyway?
You are absolutely right. Good call.

- The scene where Dusty punches Sue Ellen bothered me a lot.. this bar was obviously not a frequent Ewing hangout.. it's not like the oil baron's club where they'd refer to her as "Mrs. Ewing" and understand that her tabs will be paid in full at one time or another.  she's in a random crappy bar.  she orders drinks.. a stranger walks in, argues with her, PUNCHES HER IN THE FACE and carries her out (without leaving her payment for the drinks on the bar that I can see).. and the look from the bartender didn't make it look like it was out of the ordinary.. wouldn't your average bartender be calling the police.. not only for the lack of payment for the shots that Sue Ellen was chugging, but for a disagreement between strangers (as far as the bartender knows.. after all, they didn't come in together) in which voices were raised and a male PUNCHES a female in the face and walks out with her?? You are absolutely right. I can't believe I missed this.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Christopher is now played by a new actor -Joshua Harris- and looks at least another year older.  Guess his daddy's death really shocked him. Quite a big 4 year old. That's a great explanation for the change, actually! Thanks!

- No one apparently called Gary after Bobby's death.  He calls the house to say he heard about it (through the news?) Bobby was run over in the morning, presumably died mid-day and by night no one had gone around to telling the only family member not living in Dallas..  Kind of thoughtless.  You'd think someone would have called him. Good point.

- Also his time at Southfork was never pleasant, you'd think that he would bring Val or Abby or whomever he was involved with home for some support when he came to visit.  I mean Val was Bobby's sister-in-law for years .You'd think she would want to pay her respects... Yes, but the Dallas producers don't want to PAY her. :)

- Ms. Ellie is looking at a picture of Bobby on her desk a few hours after the accident.  Isn't it kind of strange that she has no other pictures of her family-not even her sons or grandkids- on the desk.  I could understand if this was a few days later and all she wanted to do was stare at his image so she removed all other pictures, but it looks like she just happens to notice it there for the first time.  This struck me as strange.... It's a nice touch but you're right. I remember a few seasons ago when she had a picture of Pam on her dresser, which I found so stupid since Pam's not even related to her!


Episode 193: Rock Bottom, Part Two

- The bag lady has some really nice glasses. Maybe even prescription glasses! And not a scratch or nick on them. Is she holding on to them in case she gets a hankering for a really expensive bottle of Chateau Lafitte?

- You don't have to be a genius to see that Sue Ellen has a bad day...on the nitpick front as well. First, let's start with JR's tirade towards her at the beginning of the show. After her tearful walk back to the driveway...we hear a car starting and pulling out! You mean Sue Ellen's car was there the whole time? So why did she leave in Dusty's car after the funeral? Wouldn't she eventually need her wheels?

- Not only that, but when we see Sue Ellen in the bar shortly thereafter, she's changed her clothes. How? Did she buy something at a store and wear it out? It's unlikely that she went back to Dusty's room, because Dusty would have never let her go out on her bender.

- AHN Anne and I both found it ridiculous that the car thief would find her car right away after her ever-so-specific description of the vehicle as being "gray". Especially since it was one of about five gray cars in the first half of the parking lot! Unless the guy recognized her as Sue Ellen Ewing, why did he assume it was the gray MERCEDES?

- I don't want to be cruel here, because I think that Linda Gray is a very lovely woman. But when she's in the red light district, staring through the window of the liquor store, what exactly did the guy in the store find appealing about her? I mean, even though she still is Sue Ellen, her hair is a mess, her face is a mess, her clothes are a mess...you get the idea. I don't think the guy spotted her diamond ring, because she had her hands pressed up against the window, so the ring would probably not be visible. If he were looking for female companionship, there are lots of ready and willing women not far from the liquor store, and Sue Ellen certainly doesn't appear to have been accosted or molested. Is he just looking for someone to talk to? This doesn't seem like enough motivation to buy a whole lot of booze and get a motel room. Just so Sue Ellen can lie on the bed and hear about his adventures at the racetrack?

- I'm really trying not to make snide comments about this, but bear with me. When JR first arrives at Mandy's place, she comes out of her bedroom tying up her dressing gown. We can't see any clothing other than the dressing gown, which leads us to believe that she's very skimpily dressed. Now, bear in mind that Mandy told JR she was reading. Also bear in mind that JR is planning an evening out, so it's not exactly bedtime yet. So does Mandy usually read in underclothes or lingerie in the early evening? As I said, I'm trying very hard to refrain from a snide comment here.

- When talking to Jenna about Charlie's upbringing, she says something inexplicable: that she believes it takes two to raise a child. REALLY? Which plastic surgery made you realize this, Jenna? Certainly in your first two incarnations you never gave a second thought to the lack of a strong male influence on your daughter!

Mike, AHN Bill, Joe Stanganelli, and many others noticed that Bobby's will is surprisingly up-to-date.  Not only does it include mention of Jenna and the Boutique (by the way, what happened to the Boutique when she was in jail?), but it also states that Bobby left his 30% of Ewing Oil to Christopher.  30%???  Didn't Bobby have 35% until very very recently, until he had to give 5% to Jack?  Did Bobby say to himself after the deal, "Gee, I've lost 5% of Ewing Oil, guess it's time to update my will."  How often does one update one's will, especially at Bobby's age?  Maybe this is normal behavior for people as rich as the Ewings.  Or maybe Harve was nice enough to update Bobby's will and cover letter... Certainly you're all correct...it should say 35 on the will. Though it is possible that Harve changed it or at least paraphrased, realizing that it's 30 now.

AHN Anne's corner:

- I thought that Bobby really shafted Pam in his will. His reason was that she already had more wealth than she'd ever need, but he bequeathed sentimental things to the rest of the family to show how much he loved them. Wouldn't something like that be appropriate for her, too? All she got was a wish for good luck. I'd feel really hurt if I were her. Yeah, I know what you mean. But on the other hand [and I'm not being wishy-washy here], Pam and Bobby's relationship WAS special. I'm sure we agree that they were totally meant for each other. Perhaps he could have left some memento of their time together but I figure she got most of that in the divorce settlement.

- Sue Ellen is on the wrong side of the tracks, right? Well how do you think she spent the night in that neighborhood and managed to keep that huge diamond ring as long as she did? Agreed. I realized this when the guy took it away from her. It's possible that she slept in such a way that her left hand was hidden from view - drunk people sleep very soundly and don't toss and turn that much.

- Pam got ANOTHER new car. What's more, I think she picked up some of Bobby's driving habits. Did you notice how she was driving smack dab in the middle of the road? :) Yes I did! Yikes.

-When J.R. wakes up and he begins to unload Mandy's groceries, how did it happen that he found a glass right there on the counter? I didn't notice one. And I didn't notice him pour himself some juice, either. I wondered about this too. Could have been a TNN cut.

Joe Stanganelli submitted one more minor point about the episode.  How many engagement rings has Sue Ellen gone through?  I know she's been remarried to J.R., but her original ring was a hell of a lot bigger than the one she has now (or had, until it was stolen).  I would think she might be wearing that one as well. Maybe she swapped it for a sweeter wedding ring once the ceremony happened.

AHN Bill's corner:

- I understand that Pam, JR and Cliff were all shocked by Bobby's unexpected death. When someone close to you dies, you tend not to think clearly. Having said so, it still seems odd to me that neither Pam JR or Cliff even considers the possibility that someone other than JR would manage Bobby's share of Ewing oil.  I mean.. we all know that the share will go to Christopher.. we also all know that he's underage and couldn't possibly manage it.  Did the always-calculating JR actually think that Bobby was going to give him 60% (30+30%) of Ewing oil to control??  After all the problems that Bobby had with JR's running of it?  I mean.. at least you'd think Bobby'd give Ellie his voting shares or something to make sure JR didn't have full run of the company.  and JR and Cliff seem shocked to high hell to find that Bobby gave Pam Christopher's share of Ewing oil.  both are not dumb.. and both have shown very much in the past that they seem to put business interests (especially when it's Barnes vs. Ewing) before family.. the look on the faces when they all find out is way too over done.
This is an interesting way of looking at it. JR probably assumed [and quite correctly] that since Pam doesn't know much about the oil business, Bobby wouldn't involve her. It might also have something to do with the fact that Pam's been through so much lately. Cliff would probably assume the same thing. Of course, Bobby made the correct decision because in the long run, Pam is the only person who will sincerely look out for Christopher's interests before his or her own.

AHN's Jason's corner:

- I found it surprising that Bobby neglected to leave anything to Sue Ellen, Donna, Lucy or Valene considering how long he has known them. You'd think a sensitive guy like Bobby would be more thoughtful.... a memento or something. Well, let's face it. He didn't leave anything like that to Pam. This can be explained by the fact that all of the women you mentioned were Bobby's sisters-in-law, and not blood relatives. Except of course for Lucy. It's possible that Bobby, from the grave, READ THE SCRIPT and knew that Lucy wouldn't be there anyway, so he figured he might as well not give her anything. That's a true nit.

- Why the heck does Ms. Ellie seem to blame Sue Ellen for dragging JR down? She witnessed him verbally abuse her for about the last 5 or six episodes and never seemed to threaten him to shape up. No wonder he grew up to be so crooked.. his parents seem to justify his actions even when they witness him doing others in.
I know what you're saying but Sue Ellen's not helping anything. And Ellie hasn't 'witnessed' too much of JR's abuse, though I'm sure she knows about it. Maybe she doesn't know how extensive it is. And the bottom line is that only Sue Ellen can make herself feel guilty about things...JR just knows how to push the right buttons.


Episode 194: Those Eyes

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

- Not a nit, just a comment: there's a new Sheriff in Braddock! Did Fenton Washburn retire or did he fall out of favor with the Ewings?

- I'm sure there will be lots of comments about Jack telling Ray he was "almost married" once. Later, of course, we learn that he was indeed married, to the pretty April Stevens. It's quite possible he's just lying to Ray or avoiding the issue so as not to be asked any more probing questions.

Laurel Gross mentioned: In Episode 95, we see footage of the Beauty Pageant, where Sue Ellen is said to be 5'7'' 1/2.  But in this episode when she's in the detox ward, she's said to be 5'10''. I'm not a doctor but usually one doesn't grow a drastic 3'' after age 18. Did they include her heels in that measurement? Or did Sue Ellen, in attempt to be more like Barbie, get some sort of plastic surgery that makes your heels always lifted (like Barbie's).

AHN Mike's corner:

- Whose dream is this anyhow - Pam's or Sue Ellen's? The police say Sue Ellen is 5'10", 110 lb. 100 lb.?!? In your dreams, Sue Ellen! Yeah, I found this odd. Linda Gray's taller than me? I don't think so. And the weight is absolutely ridiculous.

- This whole drunk thing with Sue Ellen is done to the point of being cartoonish. It's just downright hokey and embarrassing. I remember hating it when it first ran 12 years ago and I hate it even more now. You mean the cops didn't give her one phone call? Or that they did but she was so messed up she couldn't remember her name or phone number the whole time she was there? Phooey! Well, it's possible. I mean, the DTs are a terrible thing. You can't think straight, you can't act straight...I think it gives Linda Gray the opportunity to show what a great actress she is...at least yesterday. Today she's just kind of scary. Also, bear in mind that you only get your 'one phone call' if you're under arrest - which Sue Ellen is not.

- That cartel member, Andy Bradley, actually spoke in this episode. Up till now you might have assumed he was a deaf mute!

AHN Anne's corner:

- Ray sounded and looked a bit surprised to see Jack when he was out riding the first time. That can't be a good sign. Sure, Jack owns ten percent of the company, but he's not exactly close to the family yet. Did the family say that he could come by any time, pick up a horse and ride the terrain?
Yes, this was very strange. Probably a TNN-cut scene we missed. I'm sure Ellie doesn't mind Jack's presence, since he did single-handedly save the company.

-And what's with the guy at the desk in the police station? First of all, the records he had with him looked like he was crossing off names at a voting precinct. Weren't there more sophisticated means of keeping tabs on the inmates in those days? And in an inner-city police station, it really doesn't seem too likely that he'd remember Sue Ellen, her condition and where they took her.
Hmm..that's a good point. Even though they sent around a description of her, she looks very grungy and nondescript at this point. And I wonder what kind of description the Ewings could give, since they don't even know what she's wearing at this point!

AHN Bill's corner:

- This one really made me laugh. We see Ray staring off into space while watching the Cowboys. In our first glance of the game, we see Cowboys quarterback Danny White complete about a 40 yard pass downfield. After this happens in a real football game (even though Donna let us know that the game was toward the end and a close one), it takes time for the officials to move the chains and for the two teams to get down the field, for a play to be called, etc. In spite of this, we see Danny white handing off the ball less than 10 seconds after we watched the end of the last play. I chuckled when I saw this. The timing was way off. There's a reason that it takes three hours to play 60 minutes of football.
I think Ray mentions it's tape delayed. Maybe he means they're just showing highlights, like one of those NFL Films shows. I noticed this too.

- Finally we see Jenna is thinking of leaving Southfork. I'm surprised this is the first that it's came up, that she has not already left and that she is going to keep hanging around at all. In the past, she has shown herself to be quite independent and even resentful of those who offer to support her in what she deems to be charity. Even if she were truly engaged to bobby at the time of his death, this would be a bit odd. The fact that she knew or at least suspected his feelings for Pam (what did she think he was doing over there in the morning.. Not having come home to SF the night before?) Makes this even more odd.
I think Jenna knows, but is hoping that no one else thinks about it and puts two and two together. Pam hasn't said anything yet, after all. Of course, you're right: there is no good reason for Jenna to hang around any more.

- Joe Stanganelli picked up that Pam's picked up her bad habit of talking through her chin, again.  In her phone conversation with Cliff, she has the telephone speaker far below her mouth and onto her chin.  I realize the producers want us to see Victoria Principal's face, but this is just silly.  Even Cliff knows enough talk directly into the phone!  But then again, I think Pam is more attractive than her brother (no offense to Ken Kercheval).

- Joe Stanganelli also mentioned that after J.R.'s meeting with his banker, demonstrating worry for Sue Ellen, J.R. picks up a picture of her on the bookshelf.  Isn't it convenient that whenever a Dallas character is thinking about a family member, a picture of that family member is readily handy (thanks to the property master who put it there but a few minutes ago).  I was reminded of the day before when Miss Ellie picked up the picture of Bobby that just happened to be there (though there were none of J.R., Gary, or anyone else).  And towards the end of the seventh season, when Bobby is having second thoughts about marrying Jenna, there just happens to be a picture of Christopher handy to remind Bobby of his son.  I'm not saying its impossible for these pictures to be around, but why haven't we ever seen them in their respective places before?  At least the Jock Ewing portrait remained in the same place for every episode.


Episode 195: Resurrection

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 2

- When Jenna ominously cabbages Donna's amniocentesis for us, I have to wonder why she left that big bowl of grapes sitting on the kitchen counter. She had three or four of them and then just left them there! Shouldn't she put them back in the fridge?

- Someone at Meadowlark needs to know their role. When the orderly offers Sue Ellen vodka, Sue Ellen presses the beeper that should alert a nurse or doctor or someone to come into the room. What I don't understand is why she has to press the button twice. Don't the people at Meadowlark know that she's Sue Ellen freakin' Ewing? JR Ewing brought his wife to this facility to have her taken care of, right? I don't think this is the kind of beep that a nurse or doctor should ignore.

AHN Joe submitted: I thought it was highly unlikely that the scene in the park with Pam and the stranger would play out that way.  Wouldn't Pam have seen that limo at the end of the scene?  After all it was only a few moments after she confronted the man.  How far away could she have been? Pam is not known for her powers of perception, but it is very unlikely.

Mike submitted: When the orderly offers Sue Ellen the vodka and she scares him into leaving, he just walks out with it in his hand.  Anyone in the hall could have caught him offering her booze.

Matthew Becker submitted: there is a continuity error. It shows Pam turn around when she is under stress. Then it cuts to an angle to show Mark and she turns around again. This is quite strange!

AHN Anne's corner:

- Did you notice Jackie's dress in the first scene? Talk about clash! I don't think even at the lowest point of the eighties that kind of outfit would have been acceptable.

- Was Bobby's picture on Pam's desk before? They said that this was Pam's first trip back to the office since his death, so she couldn't have set it out after he died and there's no way we would have missed that in previous episodes.
That used to be Christopher's picture. This is an awfully convenient change.

- Mail's on Pam's desk. Now Jackie and Pam might have been referring to the mail that's been piling up on the desk during her absence, but I kind of got the impression that Pam was expecting that day's mail as well. Then Cliff came in and said that he'd take her out to lunch. Now I'm not sure how efficient the postal service is in Texas, but in the Midwest, we never get mail before lunch. Back me up on this.
I believe you. Here in Ontario we usually get it in the morning, but this isn't hard to believe.

- I don't understand the logic behind Wendell's offer. All it will mean is that J.R. can go and buy another company. Well, what's the point? Why not keep the company they have and run that one, especially since it's a family legacy. Now that Bobby's dead and J.R.'s in control, I doubt if the oil business will cause heartache the way it used to. I don't know. I think there really isn't much sense to the whole proposition.
I agree. The whole thing is just a new angle to provide a monster Pam push. That said, JR could go and buy another company but it would only have 30% of the resources that Ewing Oil has right now - and he'll have to go out and find new customers and all that.

- It's not Larry Hagman's fault, but did you notice that he had pink eye when he was talking business with Pam today? He looked a little sick.

- AHN Joe S found: Why doesn't Mark arrive at Pam's house in his convertible with the GRAISCO license plate?  Instead, he's in a plain-looking ugly brown car. Mark probably READ THE SCRIPT, saw the camera shots, and decided it would be more suspenseful and better for the moment if he arrived in a more nondescript vehicle.

- AHN Jason found: Right before Mark comes in, Pam is on the phone with Norman, the head honcho at Wentworth... She tells him that she realizes with Katherine's death, she has a lot of voting decisions to make.  My question ---  Does this imply that Katharine (wanted for attempted murder and hiding under an assumed name) has been running Wentworth all last season while she was on the lamb?   Shouldn't Pam have been handling these decisions since the time Katharine was arrested for gunning down Bobby? I've had this on the back burner for some time, but I didn't know what to make of it...I just figured Katherine gave her proxy vote to someone, or that Wentworth had some mechanism for dealing with it. It's also possible, since it appears that Wentworth is a publicly traded company, that Katherine and Pam are just two members of the board of directors - and now that there's one fewer member, each member's vote becomes more important. But your point is well made. This shouldn't be anything new to Pam.

Introducing with a bang...AHN Joe S.'s corner

-  Money sure does make people rather presumptuous.  At least in Jack's case.  Did you notice that at the dealership, when Jack is checking out the hot little black number with the doors that open straight up and then goes to look at another car, he doesn't bother to close the door of the car.  He just leaves it wide open.  Maybe being on Southfork has gotten him used to the idea of servants doing things for him.

-  And speaking of cars, when Clayton is driving Dusty back from lunch, there is a stop sign just before the parking lot that he is pulling into, only Clayton doesn't bother to stop, or even slow down.  Instead, he just goes right through it.  He's probably channeling the spirit of Bobby. AHN Bill also noticed that the stop sign is on the left side of the road - very odd.
This is a great one! I haven't checked the tape, but AHN Bill saw it too, so I'll take your word for it.

-  Also, sometime between the last two nits I pointed out above, Pam and Cliff had a conversation that really scared me.  When Pam has a fit while Cliff is talking to her and decides to leave, she says (paraphrased), "Oh my God, I left Christopher home alone all day!" and barges out of the office.  Cliff replies, "It's not like you haven't done it before."  This got me to thinking.  Does Pam mean that she left him alone with Angela, the maid (in which case, there really isn't a lot to worry about, and Pam is just being hypersensitive) or does she mean she left him home alone with nobody? 
I think Pam means he's home with Angela [who has replaced Louisa, by the way] and she's just using it as an excuse to get out of the office. Slacker!

-  In the scene with J.R. in his office alone, when he is looking at some files, he is also presumably using his computer (indicated by him looking at it and hitting it on his way up from the chair).  However, the computer isn't on.  The screen is blank, and there aren't any horizontal lines going up and down the screen (like there are on television when a computer's pattern hasn't been synchronized with that of a television).  Either the tech. people and producers didn't think anyone would notice/care, or J.R.'s actions were misleading, and he just decided to hit the computer for no particular reason because he's upset (not a bad idea...).

- Also concerning J.R.:  J.R. states that Jeremy Wendell has already talked to Miss Ellie, Ray, and Gary.  However, there was no indication prior to this statement that Wendell had talked to Gary.  TNN couldn't have cut a scene with Gary because Ted Shackelford wasn't in the end credits.  The only possible explanation (aside from the writers just skipping any indicative scenes altogether to speed up the action) is that TNN cut a scene where Miss Ellie, Jeremy, or someone else makes specific reference to a conversation between Jeremy and Gary.
Wendell probably spoke to Gary over the phone, off-screen.

-  A continuity error concerning J.R. (and Jack as well):  When J.R. and Jack are at the bar having drinks, at the beginning of their conversation (immediately after J.R.'s toast), Jack's drink is filled near the top right after his sip from it (the liquid level is just below the insignia on the other side of the glass).  Then, after the two-shot of them resumes after the sequence of close-ups, Jack's drink is only half-full.  J.R.'s drink is a little lower as well.  Either J.R. and Jack took quick sips during the other's close-ups, or the director and editors just put different takes together (this is more likely; continuity errors like this happen more often than one would think because of the piecing together of different takes).

- The same thing happens toward the end of the episode when Jack is talking to Cliff in his [Cliff's] office.  Jack has a drink that is almost halfway down after his first sip.  On the next shot of him with his drink, Jack's drink has been mysteriously refilled near the top. Both are great calls!

-  When Jenna and Donna talk about going to lunch and later shopping, it occurred to me that Jenna still has the boutique (as bequeathed to her by Bobby).  Couldn't she get Donna some sort of discount at her own store.  It seems to me that Jenna would want to generate some extra business for her boutique.  Speaking of which, shouldn't she be at work?  What's she doing hanging around Southfork, riding horses with Charlie and baking blueberry muffins, when she has a job to do? Hey, that's right! What kind of management is this?


Episode 196: Saving Grace

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

AHN Anne's corner:

- Miss Ellie's jewelry has to get in the way. She wears these two gold bracelets (which she never wore in previous seasons --maybe something personal) and her big honking wedding ring. Is it logical that she would be wearing those, unprotected, while gardening? And would most women wear heavy bracelets to bed? I think not.
Agreed. Good call!

- Jack's burglar is such a loser! Burglary 101 should have taught him that when you make a big noise, especially if the burglaree is on the premises, you high-tail it out of there. And then if you see the victim coming at you, you don't shine a flashlight in his face as a quick fix! You shouldn't need to because you should be wearing a mask, in case the victim sees you and can identify you later on. Wendell or whoever hired a bigtime freak show for the job.
He was pathetic, wasn't he? Certainly JR would not stand for such incompetence, and neither would Wendell. I wonder if they're already setting up Angelica Nero...I don't remember.

- And once again, J.R. gets smacked, but escapes without a scratch. I guess I should have realized that if Bobby's best shot couldn't leave a mark, then Mark's wouldn't.

AHN's Jason's corner:

- I am not sure if this is a nit but did Mark come through her house when he surprised Pam  or did he sneak around back?  It didn't look like he entered from the back and I would have assumed that there would be some sort of property fence  around the whole back yard if Pam has a pool... Also shouldn't there be a fence around her pool?  Christopher is only a young kid at this point.... Some sort of safety law I think..  Rebecca mentioned that she was going to install one when she bought the house years ago.. Both are good points; if there was a way to get into Pam's backyard, Mark would surely know about it. :)

- OK lets start with the favorite topic of conversation with the newest MR. Ewing.  I will try to be as tactful as possible.  The man is a stuffer.. I bet anything..  Has anyone else noticed it is centered and hemispherical..  rather like... a hard cased jock strap  and it is the same whether he wears jeans or boxers....Not to be crude but it should shift slightly to one side or another... and not be so circular...
Which brings me to the next point.  I am a boxer man myself.  Unless he is also sewing the front fly(?) shut, I really don't see how when he sat up in his bed how he could avoid flashing the Ramboski to the TV audiences.. Mercifully the front flap was closed which goes against anything I have ever experienced with boxers  (I realize this two nits are rather graphic, but if we are going for realism, I had to speak my mind...hmmm  maybe Freud would like to comment on this part of Pam's dream...) I was really hoping to avoid any Ramboski discussions, but this is pretty funny. Comments are welcome.

- Did anyone notice that Jack's Passport has Dallas Texas on it (presumably as his address, yet seems to be stamped with foreign countries....  Didn't he move to Dallas AFTER he traveled abroad? 
I didn't notice that it says Dallas, Texas. It's possible he's been to the passport office.

- How is changing his locks doing to prevent a burglar from breaking in again? If he picked it once, he can again... Also why the heck did he break in when Jack was home.  Why not during the day?  Better lighting and less change of a disturbance..
Well, of course it can be picked again. Maybe he got a stronger lock...it's hard to tell. And of course, the burglar must not have realized his own incompetence.

- When Jack throws his hard hat at Cliff, his right hand clearly is empty, yet when  he gets into the car, he immediately starts up the engine.  The man left the keys to his BRAND NEW CAR in the IGNITION while walking around a construction site....AND  his parking is horrible.   He definitely is a Ewing....
I noticed this too. Although in his defense, Jack's parking isn't bad...no one's is. The Ewings just have no FREAKIN idea where to park.

AHN Joe S's Corner:

- First of all, there's something that's bothered me for a long time, many seasons ago and long before I ever heard of this website.  Have you noticed that no one on Dallas ever wears a seat belt?  No one!! Ever!!!!!  Actually, I think the only exception was when Bobby got Christopher from Jeff Farraday and took him to SF for the first time, and he strapped Christopher into his car seat.  Aside from that, you'll never see someone buckled up on Dallas, and this episode was no exception.  Watch closely the next time someone is in a car on Dallas (in which case they're unbuckled) or gets into one (in which case they don't bother to buckle and the car just speeds off).
You are right...seat belts seem to be an option on Texas cars. Robert Frazier reminded me that Sue Ellen also did buckle up her seat belt just before she crashed into Walt Driscoll.

- When Jeremy Wendell and Cliff are walking through the city, how does the ice cream vendor know what flavor and size of ice cream Wendell wants?  Or that Wendell wants no toppings???  I find it highly unlikely that the vendor has only one flavor in one size and no toppings. Wendell doesn't even break his conversation with Cliff for a moment.  He just gives the vendor some money and takes his ice cream.  Is Jeremy a regular customer at this stand with the same usual order?
Good call! I was busy making notes for the summary so I missed this.

- When Mark shows up unexpectedly at J.R.'s office, Sly simply identifies Mark as a "messenger," and doesn't give any indication as to who it is, nor does she sound scared or surprised.  Yet after Mark leaves, when she enters J.R.'s office, she seems very surprised and says, "I thought he was dead."  This clearly indicates that Sly knew who Mark was before, yet apparently it didn't strike her when Mark first showed up.  Very odd.
Maybe it did strike her at first, and Mark instructed her in no uncertain terms to tell JR that a 'messenger' had arrived. If she said that 'Mark Graison is here', it would have spoiled the surprise, right?

-  Did anyone notice that in his lunch conversation with Clayton, J.R. had one blue eye (his right) and one green eye (his left)?  I guess Larry Hagman was missing a contact that day. Didn't notice. I'll check.

- So we find out that Jack has a house.  When he first arrived in Dallas he had a hotel room.  Then, I got the impression he had moved onto Southfork, because he spent so much time there.  Now he has a house.  Not only does he now own a fairly nice-looking house in the Dallas area, but it is well furnished and looks particularly lived in and well settled in to.  Even assuming he could get settled into a house this quickly, how did he get so much furniture and wall decorum and get so well-organized in so little time?  The Ewing name must be more influential than I thought...
Well, he's a rich man now...and it's hard to tell exactly how much time has elapsed. It's been a few weeks at least, right?


Episode 197: Mothers

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

- Well, now we finally know. Jenna reveals in this episode that she has to go shopping to prepare to 'reopen' the boutique. In other words, the boutique has been CLOSED for some time. How long? Well, probably ever since she was kidnapped by Naldo, right? 25 episodes ago. Does she actually expect to have any customers when she reopens?

- The person taking shots of Jack should really get some of his face, don't you think? I think he or she realized it too late. The first couple of snapshots that we see show only a little bit of the right side of Jack's face! Then he turns towards the camera and it captures the big Ramboski in all his glory. Someone needs to read the manual.

- When JR breaks into Mandy's apartment, he finds it totally empty. He shouldn't be surprised, because he's got a different apartment! Remember last season? Mandy's door open straight into her livingroom, which was longer than it was wide with respect to the door. In this apartment, it's wider than it is long. Come on, JR. Dig out that address again. [Maybe you can chalk this one up to "it happened in Pam's mind"].

Kyle Wasko pointed out something very pertinent regarding the meeting in Cliff's office. Wendell hands Mark Graison a report which is supposed to be a comprehensive analysis of his company. The analysis includes (to paraphrase Wendell): financial statements for the past 10 years, as well as financial predictions for the next ten [years]. This is, of course, absurd. Any first year business student worth his salt will tell you that reliable financial predictions cannot exceed two years. Trying to predict anything beyond two years time would be dangerous (not to mention ridiculous). Add that to the fact that we're talking about the oil industry, a very volatile market, and the meeting in Cliff's office seems quite silly.

AHN Anne's corner:

- Mark's doctor friend has a weird intercom. Usually, when the secretary has something to say, she buzzes and then the boss has to press a button and say, "Yes?" and then she tells him what she has to say. But Jerry's intercom works so that she can annoy him whenever she wants to. Yes, this is strange.

- Patricia talked about J.R. and Sue Ellen's second wedding as if it was all unfamiliar to her. Is there a special reason why she wasn't there?
I know the reason: the producers didn't want to pay Martha Scott to be there. I leave it to you to decide whether this is a 'special' reason or not.

- And what is up with Mandy's door? If J.R. can kick the door in, Mandy better install a security system for the real threats!
Maybe that's why she left that cheap place.

- Finally, in that last shot, did you notice how Miss Ellie walked away from the door, past J.R.'s office and looked at Jock's portrait, then she was magically back in Bobby's doorway? Then her ordeal of looking at Jock's picture was replayed. How bizarre! Yes I did notice. This was weird.

AHN's Jason's corner:

- Sue Ellen's therapist says "So because your father was an alcoholic, that makes you an alcoholic".....Excuse me but isn't alcoholism hereditary.... I am not saying that Sue Ellen shouldn't take actions for her behavior but this is a valid fact that the therapist should be aware of...
AHN Joe pointed this out too. I think what the therapist means is that Sue Ellen is using this as an excuse for her alcoholism. Sure, we can say that it's hereditary, but that doesn't help us, does it? And Sue Ellen says she wants to overcome her problem, so the therapist wants to remove her excuse.

- Mark tells his doctor that he had Pam believing he was dead for "almost a year"    Lets' see....  Mark 'died' several episodes before the 83-84 season cliffhanger  and didn't appear again until fall of 85....  that seems to be more than a year.... and  Dallas time lawyers seem to run faster than real time (Just look at the kids growth spurts..) Well, this could be explained semantically...Pam didn't actually believe he was dead until she came back from Hong Kong, right? I know what you're saying though.

AHN Joe S's Corner:

-  Is Miss Ellie trying to act stuck-up towards Patricia or was she just not thinking?  She tells Patricia that John Ross is in his room, and Patricia goes in to see him.  How can Patricia be expected to know where John Ross's room is?  She hasn't been on SF since John Ross was a baby and his room was in the nursery (which is now Christopher's bedroom when he visits).  Plus, there do seem to be a lot of bedrooms on Southfork (the master bedroom, J.R.'s, Sue Ellen's, John Ross's, the nursery, Bobby's, Jamie's, Jenna's, Charlie's, Lucy's, plus the servants' rooms, etc..  I guess Patricia really is stubborn, because she goes right in without even asking where John Ross's room is. Yes! Yes! Yes! You are absolutely right! I can't believe I missed this. Although the point is, as we will soon see, that Patricia and Ellie don't see eye to eye on anything.

-  When she's at the big clothing store with Donna, Jenna mentions she needs to get things from there to restock her boutique.  Wouldn't it make more sense for Jenna to buy directly from the manufacturer, rather than from an expensive, swank retail store?  Not only would it save money, but it would make buying things in bulk a lot easier.  No wonder Bobby didn't leave her that much in the will; she'd probably squander it all in a few months.
Correct on both counts. Of course, if she bought from the manufacturer, Jack couldn't have his snapshots taken, and then they couldn't make goo-goo eyes at each other.

- If you look closely at the invitation to the Ball, you'll notice the stamp on the envelope of the invitation is uncanceled.  I doubt the invitation was hand-delivered, because the full name and address is written on the envelope.  Occasionally the P.O. forgets to cancel stamps and sends the mail anyway, but it doesn't happen as often as Dallas makes it out to be. Really? Missed it completely.

- When J.R. calls Mandy from his office and gets the recorded message saying the line's no longer in service, the message repeats itself rather quickly, more quickly than you would hear in real life.  Plus the three high-pitched beeps that precede such messages from the phone company (I call them the three beeps from Hell) are absent here. Here in Ontario, I would say that the recorded message is dead on, both in frequency and in ability to annoy. I don't know if the three beeps were around in 1985...but they would be now.

- Another thing about J.R.'s call to Mandy: J.R. is using the big office phone, and dials seven numbers.  You'd think he got it right this time, but wouldn't he have to dial eight numbers for an outside line on the office phone (He'd dial "9" first)?  It's possible the Ewing Oil phones aren't set up this way, but this is still pretty iffy.
I don't know. This seems to change episode to episode. Unlike Barnes-Wentworth, where Jackie once indicated that they use four-digit extensions, I have no direct evidence that the Ewing Oil phones work that way.


Episode 198: The Wind of Change

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

- Everybody, including AHNs Anne and Jason, thought it was really stupid to have a rabbit farm at a sanitarium. [If you missed the episode, there's a scene where Sue Ellen and JR talk about her recovery, and John Ross goes to play with some bunnies.]

- That first scene with Jenna, Jack, and Charlie, is really annoying. First of all, I'm beginning to remember why I dislike Jenna so much. Her shushing Charlie while she tries to play matchmaker is ridiculous - come on Jenna, you know you like him. Charlie's bad harmonica playing is an even stranger touch to what would ordinarily be a fairly funny scene.

- When Sue Ellen says goodbye to her friend at the sanitarium, she mentions that they were 'roommates'. How does that work? In a sanitarium? I seem to recall that during JR's internment in 1990, he also had roommates, which strikes me as odd now that I think about it.

- During Pam and Ellie's conversation at her home, there's a continuity problem. When the camera is focused on Pam, it sounds like a hose or sprinkler is working in the background. This sound is not heard when the camera's focus is on Ellie. Obviously the sprinkler was going during one take and not in another.

- About the Oil Baron's ball: as AHN Jason found, how the heck did Mandy get in? Who does she know in the oil business other than JR, Cliff, and Jeremy Wendell? If Wendell invited her, shouldn't she be sitting at his table? Instead, she's sitting at some random table where I assume all of the uninvited people sit.

- Speaking of which, how did Patricia Shepard get in? She's only been in town for a few days - who sacrificed a ticket so she could come? Maybe it's Lucy's ticket...or maybe the Ewings just buy enough seats to fill a table and happened to have one for her. I find the latter hard to believe because the Ewing table seems full even though Ray, Donna, Jack, and Jenna are absent.

- Jordan Lee's demeanor bears some scrutiny. When re-introducing himself to Mark Graison, he just says "Good to see you, Mark." Huh? Is this how you greet a guy who's returned from the dead? No one seems to be surprised at seeing Mark up and about again, which makes zero sense. The guy should be mobbed by old friends and acquaintances and interested media types.

- What about the Jock Ewing scholarship winners? Shouldn't they be announced? And whatever happened to the Digger Barnes scholarship that Cliff established last year? Or, in the true spirit of cheapness, did he not go through with it?

- It's clear that the producers didn't want to pay Morgan Woodward for being in this episode because it probably went over budget, but where the hell is Punk Anderson? He's chairman of the darn committee, right?

- Pam says something very odd during her emotional speech to the crowd. Did Bobby never draw a distinction between Ewing Oil and the family? It seems that that comment is more descriptive of JR than Bobby. Bobby left Ewing Oil on more than one occasion without abandoning the family, albeit much earlier in the series. Even during the battle for the company after Jock's will is read, Bobby only indicates how important the company is too him because of his father, but I don't ever recall him intimating that it dominates his life and validates his existence, the way JR often does.

Clint submitted: when JR talks to Sue Ellen in the sanitarium, JR says John Ross will stay at South Fork -- yet he tells Bobby's spirit, his mother, Mandy, those oil people that he is leaving and going to bigger and better things. Knowing how crafty JR is -- he couldn't have known his mother was listening in on his conversation with Bobby's spirit - but maybe he played a hunch -- he always does that so well.
I think what JR means is that Sue Ellen can't take his son away from him. Maybe he just doesn't want to hint to Sue Ellen that he might be leaving Dallas. This is interesting, though.

Kyle Wasko mentioned: Aside from the fact that it was grossly overdone, I just have a little comment to make about today's Ray/Donna debacle. Jack says to Jenna: "she could end the pregnancy" (or something like that) and Ray to Donna: "you can get pregnant again" (paraphrasing...). Two less than subtle references to abortion. The Dallas writers, however, seem intent on not using the A-word. More to follow, no doubt...
Yes, you are right. I find this very odd in light of the fact that they had no problem with the A-word when Lucy had hers two years ago. What changed between 1983 and 1985? Maybe something about aborting a child just because it has Down's Syndrome as opposed to a child begotten by a rape.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Good thing Donna got that bad news..  I really like her character but between that teased to death hair do and the black nighty that poses at a dress, she looks like the bride of Dracula.....
This is the first time that I actually feel inclined to say something positive about Susan Howard's acting. Not that she's a bad actress - she just doesn't get good scenes. But today's thing with Ray was quite good. That said, her outfits and hair absolutely do make her look hideous.

- I just knew that cream pie was going to fly... although I thought JR was going to be the thrower....  Did anyone notice the lady standing behind Cliff after he gets hit by the pie.  For the rest of the scene, she has an arm across her chest defensively like she's afraid someone will assault her with a pastry.. Kind of overacting...
I didn't notice that. Interesting. I bet in one of the takes she did get hit.

- Did anyone notice that after Pam accept the statue and gave her speech, she left the podium WITHOUT the statue..... Guess it really meant a lot to her....
I didn't notice that either. Good one!

AHN Anne's corner:

-Did you notice how Patricia opened the front door and then Sue Ellen had to put her suitcase in the back seat? Maybe this isn't a nit, just stupid on Patricia's part. There is a back door, you know. Didn't notice. Good call!

-J.R. is not the greatest guy in the world, but he does have some class. Is it logical that he would be wearing cowboy boots to the biggest social event of the year? I wouldn't think so! Wasn't that dumb? I don't understand this show sometimes.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- When the Barnes clan is having dinner at Cliff's condo, there is one point where Jamie pulls a chair back to sit down, then the shot cuts to a close-up of Pam.When the shot is back on Jamie just a few short seconds later, we find her pushed all the way in to the table and sitting very comfortably.  Is it just me, or did this seem rather abrupt?  It doesn't seem she would have had time to be sitting like that by the time the camera's back on her, but instead would be just settling down in her chair. I checked and you're right. Good call.

-  When Miss Ellie is on the balcony with Clayton, and Raoul is walking away after Ellie offered to take care of the dishes, she asks Raoul where J.R. went.  Without bothering to stop or even look at her, Raoul replies rather vaguely ("He took John Ross and left") and then leaves, before Miss Ellie can say anything else or ask a follow-up question. Raoul's been pretty rude lately, huh? Did he do that? I guess I was kind of spaced out at the beginning of the episode.

- What sort of accent is Angelica Nero supposed to have?  It sounds Eastern European (probably Hungarian or Romanian), but her surname Nero is Italian.  Maybe the director wasn't specific enough when he told her she was foreign.  Are all foreign accents supposed to sound like this?
It's a caricature, of course. For all we know, maybe her name is Brenda Goldberg and she's from Queens and maybe this whole thing is an act.

- Ellie must either be clairvoyant or hypocritical.  When telling J.R.that she'll stand by him and won't sell her shares of Ewing Oil, she tells him that Gary and Ray won't sell, either.  How does she know this? We haven't seen either of these Ewing sons make a decision one way or the other, and Ellie told Ray in no uncertain terms would she act as his "conscience" and direct him as to what to do.  Has she had a sudden change of heart?  Or is she acting out of desperation to keep J.R.'s spirit up and keep him and John Ross on Southfork? She must have talked to them about it, and like the boring jellyfish they are, they stood by her decision just like they said they would do.

- When Sue Ellen leaves the sanitarium with Patricia, they are only carrying one piece of baggage out (actually, Patricia's carrying it).  I was able to accept the fact that Sue Ellen was able to wear designer clothes at the sanitarium from time to time (q.v., the scene walking with J.R. while John Ross is playing with the rabbits) because I figured the Ewings probably sent some clothes over for her, but I'm surprised that all of those outfits would fit in that one suitcase, unless they were carelessly stuffed in.  Two suitcases would seem about right in this situation.
Agreed. And I'm also not sure where the outfit for the Oil Baron's Ball came from.

- Another nit about Sue Ellen leaving the sanitarium:  When Sue Ellen leaves the sanitarium, she has her purse with her.  How?  When Sue Ellen was picked up, she had nothing with her, not even a purse.  How does she have one now?  Is there a gift shop at the sanitarium?
Did she? I missed this too! Of course, it may have come with the designer clothes.

- This is more a nit about Wednesday's episode, but why did Mandy disappear?  This wasn't sufficiently explained in her reunion with J.R.. She was concentrating too much on looking seductive and acting like a porn star.
Agreed. There's no explanation for this at all, except that Deborah Shelton probably wanted a few days off and/or it makes JR seem more isolated if he can't seek solace in someone. As for acting like a porn star...well, based on some of the responses I'm getting for the latest Poll of the Week, this is exactly what the Dallas fans want.

- At last year's Oil Barons' Ball, Punk Anderson was the Master of Ceremonies only because Clayton Farlow couldn't do it.  Why was the Master of Ceremonies Jordan Lee this year, instead of last year's first pick, Clayton? I posted the nit that Punk should be the one because he's supposedly the chairman of the Blue Ribbon committee...but why not Clayton. Good point!

- When Pam is on stage, accepting the Bobby's award on behalf of Christopher, she says, "There's a lot of wisdom in what Miss Ellie said. I guess I know where Bobby got his from."  Excuse me, but did that Barnes woman just insult Jock???  I'm surprised J.R. didn't take any overt offense to that remark.
I spotted this too! Right away! I wondered why JR let it go, and that's why I let it go...I figured he read the script and realized it would work out in the end.

-  Finally, we notice that J.R. is certainly overeager to get Christopher's shares of Ewing Oil.  But if he had listened to Pam's speech, he would have heard that she wants Christopher to follow in his daddy's footsteps in the oil business, and basically inferred she wants Christopher to have that chance in Ewing Oil, eventually taking over what Bobby left behind.  Now think: How can Christopher do that if Pam sells his shares to J.R.???  Obviously, she's not going to sell to anyone!!!  I rarely have nits concerning things J.R. says or does, but this is really stupid. That's a good point. Pam says a lot of things and now that I think about it, it's quite possible JR wasn't paying attention until she got to the end and said what he wanted to hear.

- When Jenna leaves the lake after Jack has asked to escort her to the Ball, Charlie just stays behind, kicks back, and relaxes.  Jenna doesn't beckon for Charlie to follow her, or even ask if Charlie is staying with Jack (nor does she ask if Charlie will be going anywhere else).  Nor does Charlie make any prior indication that she wants to stay with Jack.  This is odd.  Southfork is a pretty big place after all.  It's not exactly your typical backyard.  Doesn't Jenna want to know where her
daughter will be (much less ask that Charlie come with her)?

- What is John Ross doing at the sanitarium?  Shouldn't he be at school?  It's possible that it's the weekend, but we've been seeing a lot of John Ross during the day lately.  Come to think of it, the same goes for Clayton.  Doesn't he have, like, a job to go to, or something?  Yet everyday, save the occasional trip to Texas City, we see him just wandering around Southfork (usually following Miss Ellie).  Maybe he and Jenna are soulmates.


Episode 199: Quandary

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 1

- As AHN Joe S noticed along with me, Phyllis must be awfully resourceful. Pam asks her for herbal tea, and Phyllis has a steaming cup for her lickety-split! How does she get it so quickly? Is JR a closet herbalist himself? Was Bobby or, dare I say it, Jock, fond of it? Yikes!

- And by the way, who unlocked Bobby's office? JR ordered it locked after Bobby died so it wouldn't be disrupted. He opened it a few days ago to talk to it, but then did he leave it unlocked so Pam could get in?

- I don't understand why the soccer game jobs to Ray and Donna. Donna picks up the ball and spends thirty seconds realizing how wonderful the handicapped kids really are. Then she passes the ball to Ray, who spends the same amount of time deciding not to be such a jerk anymore. Meanwhile, the kids are waiting for their ball back from the nice old couple without saying a word. Shouldn't someone from the crowd at least speak up?

Kyle Wasko mentioned: Did anybody else find the soccer coach/supervisor's response to Donna's comment somewhat strange? I sure did. Donna says "they sure look like their having fun" and then the coach says "of course they are,
they're winning." What? Shouldn't he say "it's a fun game" or "it's a great day" or... or... something else. Anything but the harmful "winning is everything" mantra (but then again, it is Texas). Also, about the soccer game (now I know this is a sensitive topic so I'll try and be careful), why are all the fans going ballistic on the sidelines? I know that the players have Downs Syndrome and that they need a lot of support, but c'mon, they're just kicking it around in the midfield. Even the
world's greatest soccer fan would have trouble getting exuberant about that. (Note: I am aware of the hypocrisy that exists between my two comments- one complaining about the emphasis on winning, and then the other nagging about the game itself.)

AHN Joe S's corner:

-  Mandy mentions that the place she's currently staying at belongs to a friend who's away temporarily.  If that's true, then where did Mandy put all of her furniture and other things (remember, she cleaned everything out of her old place)?  I find it highly unlikely there'd be enough room for her friend's stuff and hers.
Perhaps it's in storage. That's a good point.

- When Donna meets Ray at the building site for their new house, there isn't a car in sight; she just comes out of nowhere.  Hard to believe a pregnant lady would have walked all that way. I noticed Donna waddle away too...I figured it might be near their old house, but there's no evidence of that.

- Why would news of a national Space Bill be in the Business section?  Unless it has an immediate, obvious effect on local industry, shouldn't it be in the National News section? This is a good point, but a lot of these projects take place in Texas because there's a lot of available desert land.

- Why does Cliff hit "3" on his telephone to get Jackie on the intercom?  Was the intercom missing that day, or was "3" simply the handiest button to hit?  Also, when he's done talking to Jackie, he doesn't even hit it again to end the conversation.
This appears to be a new phone system. I'm not sure whether Cliff hit '3' or whether that's some other button. It's very hard to tell, but AHN Jason confirms that it was "3".

- Also, we know that Jamie is at Jack's place, and then Cliff calls her, hitting only one button ("3" again), presumably on speed dial.  My question is:  Why does Cliff have Jack on speed dial???  Did he really consider Jack that important an asset in the deal with Jeremy Wendell? Or was he just tired of having to dial seven digits and always get it wrong?
I think he probably hit the redial button. Are you sure it's the same button?

- Just before Sue Ellen meets Dusty, she is driving Ewing 2.  Isn't that Miss Ellie's car?  Why did Ellie let Sue Ellen borrow her car?  In fact, Sue Ellen hasn't even been to SF since she got out of the sanitarium. This is odd. You're right! I checked the tape and you're right! How did this happen?

- When Angelica meets J.R. for dinner, there are only water glasses and the usual place settings on the table.  When the waiter comes, they order drinks.  But in Angelica's close-up not much later, she takes a sip of something with a crimson hue.  This certainly isn't water.  J.R. also magically has a drink for his close-up.  Then, the waiter serves their drinks!  This makes no sense whatsoever. I'll take another look at this.

- Even though Angelica hasn't seen the menu, yet, she immediately knows what she wants upon opening the menu, without even looking at it.  I doubt she's a regular at La Champagne (since we can only infer she's new in Dallas), so this is kind of dumb. She seems familiar with French food. I'm not too sure what she's saying - forgotten all my high school French.

- In the last scene, Pam storms in on Mark in a bedroom in Pam's house. Pam also says "Is this how it's going to be -- You in your bedroom, me in mine?!?"  This leads us to believe that Mark is living with Pam.  My question is: Why???  Before Mark's "death," they didn't live together (though they did spend a lot of time with each other and one sometimes stayed the night at the other's place).  And Mark has a beautiful estate that would put Pam's house to shame.  So why does Mark have his own separate bedroom at Pam's house?
I'm not too sure about this one. I have a feeling we missed something as a result of a TNN cut.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Didn't Angelica invite Cliff and Jamie to dinner?  Doesn't look like she served Cliffy anything but a drink.....
Maybe they already ate and this is the after-dinner banter.

- Anyone notice that Pam barges into her first staff meeting with no writing materials, notes, briefcase  or such...  I know she was surprised to hear about it and rushed in, but you'd think she would have grabbed a notebook or something to jot down her thoughts... As Randy Savage is wont to say, "Oh....that's just my style!" I think that Pam just wanted to make it known that she knows her role within the company and everyone else should too.

- This is a question not necessarily a nit..  Wouldn't there be a conflict of interest to have Pam help run Ewing Oil  and Barnes Wentworth?   For example tonight, Angelica says she is looking into both companies for some deal. And JR asked Pam at the staff meeting what she knew about the Marinos deal with Barnes...Seems to be a conflict of interest or something unethical about running two rival companies.. This bears some scrutiny. If I remember correctly, Pam doesn't "run" Barnes-Wentworth: Rebecca gave it to Cliff for his very own. Cliff asked Pam to come and work for him, specifically as a PR person. The assumption has to be that Pam has quit her work at Barnes-Wentworth for now. I don't remember whether this is specifically addressed later or not. It's a good point.

AHN Anne's corner:

- Jenna's got a new boutique! This one is definitely larger than the shop she had before. I thought that Bobby left her the store, so does it seem possible that she'd go out and buy a new one? I figured she expanded with the money Bobby left her.

-The headline about the Weststar/Ewing Oil takeover in Cliff's newspaper is bad journalism. "Weststar/Ewing Oil Take Over a Bust." That headline needs an active verb and you really shouldn't use articles in headlines, either. Once again, they may do things differently down South. Spoken like a true journalism student.


Episode 200: Close Encounters

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 2

- Boy, these Texans sure are excitable people. I thought that the crowd at Friday's soccer game overdid it by cheering for every kicked ball [I do realize they were trying to encourage the kids]. But this rodeo crowd is ridiculous! They're cheering for every word the announcer says! By the end of the day, they'll all be hoarse!

- Early in the episode, Jack drags Jenna around to get herself registered for the events. What I want to know is how Sue Ellen got registered. She didn't even want to go to the rodeo until the day before! Seems unlikely she'd get so enthusiastic so quickly. Must be the bad aura she has at the ranch.

- The ambulance. I know it should be there at the rodeo, but 20 feet away from Donna, conveniently able to whisk her away to the hospital? This is ridiculous. Also, I don't remember for sure, but on a real ambulance, the word 'AMBULANCE' should be written backwards for the benefit of drivers looking at it through a rear-view mirror. I suspect that this particular vehicle did not.

- It might just be Jenna's way of talking, but she tells Ellie that she 'didn't tell anyone else' about Donna's accident. Then Ellie wonders where Clayton is, and Jenna assures her that Raoul will let him know what happened. Wait a minute: if you 'didn't tell anyone else', how would Raoul know? Or isn't Raoul 'anyone'? Boy, living at Southfork has gotten to Priscilla's head - either that or some Graceland flashbacks.

Kyle Wasko asked: Let me get this straight, the Governor of Texas comes all the way from Austin to Dallas (approximately 400 km or so) to say: "thanks for having me"? That's odd. Hmm. Good call.

AHN Anne's corner:

- If Angelica's car from the Ewings wasn't available (and I do realize that she was lying), how did Grace get back to the hotel? Do you think she could have requested a car back? I think Grace took the car, and Angelica fabricated the story. That's the only thing that makes sense to me.

- Donna's whole miscarriage was a mystery to me. Surely a fall like that wouldn't merit operation! Did the ram poke her stomach and tear her up or what? She doesn't seem the worse for wear from the outside. This was bizarre. Much like Pam's fatal fall from the hayloft way back in the mini-series...just doesn't seem right.

- Finally, towards the beginning of the episode, J.R. said that he would send a car for Angelica. Well, he knows her phone number but she never gave him an address. Maybe he took her home after dinner the other night, but you see where I'm coming from?
I do see what you mean. Hmm.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- When J.R. comes into the office toward the beginning of the episode, why doesn't Sly tell J.R. that Jack is waiting in his office?  Isn't it the usual custom of the Ewing Oil secretaries to let J.R. or Bobby know when someone is in his office?
Yes it is. Good call.

- Patricia mentions Mandy Winger to J.R..  How does she even know of Mandy's existence?  I don't think Sue Ellen ever mentioned Mandy specifically to Patricia.  Was there a TNN cut here?
We never saw it but I guess the implication is that Sue Ellen has mentioned her.

- When Pam excuses herself from Mark and Christopher at the rodeo, she says she has to use the phone to call Louise, her maid.  Didn't Angela replace Louise?  Or does Pam have two maids, now?
It looks like she's got two. Louise seems to have become invisible, though. Maybe she's become the inside maid and Angela is the outside maid.

- When Jack is talking to Jenna on the phone about Donna's condition, how does he even know what happened to Donna?  When Jenna left, she said to Miss Ellie that no one else knew what happened to Donna, and when Ellie told Clayton to go to the hospital, he said he'd leave right away. Presumably, he wouldn't have gone to find Jack before he left, and even if he told Jack, Jack probably would have left right away rather than hung around a while.
This whole thing was weird. I pointed out already that if Jenna was telling the truth, then Clayton shouldn't even know. I guess Jack finds out from that loudmouth Raoul too.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Not a nit but worth posting. Obviously the actors on the show are not professional riders.  For the most part the matching of Actors to Stunt people was done well..  I just found it a little hard to believe that Jack and Ray's hats didn't fall off when they were riding those wild animals..  And the close-ups of Jack had him moving much slower than his stunt double was doing on the real horse... Jack's hat did fall off the first time I think. I also thought this was well done.


Episode 201: Suffer the Little Children

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 1

- As we'll see below, everybody found it bizarre that Phyllis is willing to lose her job just because she wants to preserve Bobby's memory. Pam must really think highly of her to dream that she would be so noble.

AHN Mike and AOL Matt pointed out that when Patricia goes to Southfork, Miss Ellie is sitting around the pool wearing her usual sack dress and white cowgirl boots! Uhhhhg-lee!

- When JR finally arrives at the Oil Baron's Ball and asks Cassie to get him his 'usual', she takes an awfully long time! I guess she must have read the script and realized that she shouldn't interrupt JR's dramatic conversation with Angelica.

- Sue Ellen says to JR that her son is the only good thing that's come from their ten years of marriage. Hold on there, little filly. You married him in 1970. It's 1985 now. I know there was a lull of about a year or so, but wouldn't that be fifteen, or at least, fourteen, years of marriage?

Kyle Wasko pointed out that: A vodka-chugging, child neglecting woman who, over the past three months has spent a significant amount of time either: a) walking the streets of Dallas in an alcoholic haze, b) detoxifying in a hotel room
with her cowboy lover or c) committed in the local sanitarium, wishes to seek FULL CUSTODY of her young child. She seems to think she has a pretty strong case. So does her lawyer (and apparently, her husband). Is there something wrong with this picture?
I heartily agree. I can't believe JR is wasting time threatening her instead of just reminding her of all this.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Pam's conversation with Phyllis confused me.. Did Pam start to interview girls  for the job because Phyllis wanted to resign due to bad memories  or did she simply want to find the best secretary possible...  If Pam wanted her to stay, why not ask her before interviewing all those other secretaries. After all , she said Bobby spoke highly of her..  Just seems silly to search for a secretary when you have a good one already working there. And if Phyllis didn't work out, there always is JACKIE!!!!! (I had to say this.) LOL! I can't understand why Phyllis doesn't want her job anymore.

-  During the Rodeo episode yesterday,  Angelica tells Pam that Grace will be giving her the Marino's paperwork in the morning.  The next day (toady's episode) JR shows Pam his copy of some Marinos reports, then says Sly will give her all the papers.  My question:  A) why doesn't he simply give it to her then and there  (I know that  he likes to make her life difficult but why she accepts his stalling is another story)  or why doesn't Pam just grab it? B)  Why should she ask Sly if Grace is supposed to be dropping them off?  JR probably should have heard about this from Angelica by this point...
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when we try to figure out Pam's contribution to the show.

- I couldn't tell but was that Pam's office at Barnes/Wentworth that she was cleaning out?  Looked like an apartment.... and I didn't see Jackie's desk in the background when Cliffy opened the door.
I thought so too. I have a feeling that we see very little of Barnes/Wentworth this season so they decided not to use that set at all, hoping we wouldn't notice.  

AHN Anne's corner:

- Phyllis never called Pam "Mrs. Ewing" before, so why did she start today? And why would it be painful to have her around just because she was Bobby's secretary? I don't know. This is just stupid.

- Pam had the same photo of Bobby as Miss Ellie, which is okay, but it was also in the same frame. Maybe Bobby gave out multiple copies as Christmas presents or something. :) It's a nice picture [as I'm sure you'll admit]. I guess it must have been a Christmas thing.

- Secondly, how come Sue Ellen isn't using her first divorce lawyer? He was pretty successful with her case, so there doesn't seem to be much reason for a turn-around. Yes. Obviously the first actor was unavailable, but this is a very good point. He at least would be familiar with her history.

AHN Joe S's corner:

-  Just before Pam leaves J.R.'s office, after being told she'll be given all the pertinent information on the Marino deal, Pam says (after a lengthy pause), "I'll let you know what I think when I've read it." Well, no s**t, Pam!  Gee, you're quick.  What did you think he was giving you the information for?!?  The writers probably felt Pam should say something just before she left J.R.'s office, but this is just plain stupid. Bonehead line of the day...I like it. Unfortunately, it might make look like a Pam-basher because that's where all of the bonehead lines come from. I'll consider it.

- John Rettino must have gotten into Pam's office again.  As Pam is finishing her packing, she reaches into a box and pulls out two pictures of Bobby (one of the pictures I don't think we've ever seen before (the one of Bobby and Ray), at least not in Pam's office).  Wouldn't it have made more sense if Pam had her "moment" with the pictures as she was picking them up and packing them, rather than after they had been put in the box?  Or did she have another "moment" that we didn't see? This is a good point. If I know Pam, though, she's emptying one box and filling another.

- Isn't it amazing that Donna's eye makeup is so well-intact after lying in the hospital bed for a long time, and probably crying a bit, too.  I shouldn't really pick on this, though, because the make-up artists did a good job of making her look pale and weak. Another good point.

- When J.R. enters Angelica Nero's hotel room, neither he nor Angelica bothers to close the door.  It is left wide open.  However, as J.R. steps farther into the room, we see the shadow of the door moving and expanding, indicating the door is closing (all by itself, mind you), and we hear it click shut off-screen. Was Angelica's assistant hiding behind the door and in the shadows, or is the hotel room haunted by the ghost of an angry stage-hand?
It's the Phantom! It has to be!


Episode 202: The Prize

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

- I don't want to get too wrapped up in the "dream within a dream": namely, Sue Ellen's nightmare. Just one thing that I'll point out and then leave the rest to the AHNs. Sue Ellen and John Ross are magically transported from a field into a thickly wooded forest. How exactly does JR's car, without a driver, navigate through this dense woodland without crashing? It kind of reminds me of Ralph Wiggum on the Simpsons: "Sleep! That's where I'm a Viking."

- The scene between Donna and Ellie was a just a bit too contrived for my liking. They hug just as soon as we cut in to the Krebbs home. Just a little too well-timed.

- I don't understand JR. He's awfully subdued for someone who's about to 'lose' his son. Why isn't he dragging Sue Ellen through the mud instead of pussyfooting around the issue of her alcoholism and recent affairs with Dusty and Peter Richards? This is very uncharacteristic of him.

- Not a nit, just a comment. There's now a couch in the upper Southfork hallway. That's new.

- It never amazes how the producers never get this time difference thing down, given how often characters travel around the world. As the family scatters to search for John Ross, Pete Adams calls the ranch, and it's broad daylight in Athens. There is an 8 hour time difference between Dallas and Athens. So that means that if it's early morning in Dallas, it's the middle of the night in Athens. Sheesh.

- During Cliff's boring conversation with Jamie, it's clear that he's got a short memory. He tells Jamie that "It's been a long time since someone stood by his side." Excuse me, Cliffy. What about Pam? Didn't she offer you her full support when you took on the Ewings last season? Or did this not count?

- Something bothers me about John Ross's escape from the ranch. Clayton didn't wake him up, because he didn't want to risk losing the Lucy award today. Ellie didn't wake him up, because she thought Clayton would. Teresa didn't because she figured one of the Farlows would. The implication is that John Ross woke himself up. And dressed himself in nice clothes? And left the house without anybody seeing him? The second part I'll buy, but I find it kind of hard to understand why John Ross would take the time to dress nicely before running away.

- So Ellie finds him in Bobby's treehouse. All well and good. But then she just takes him for a walk and tries to straighten out his confused feelings? Shouldn't she alert his anxious mother and father first, so they stop worrying? This is very un-Ellie-like.

- Oh, and by the way, Ellie, it's very convenient that you decided to wear jeans today. Is it possible that you read the script and realized you'd have to hunt your grandson down, so you didn't put on a sack dress? At least you dumped those horrid cowgirl boots from yesterday.

AHN Anne's corner:

- Sue Ellen's mascara absolutely flowed after waking up from her dream. If you took your make-up off before you went to bed you wouldn't have that problem, dear.  Good call. That's why it's great having a female AHN. They notice these things.

- Then J.R.'s contact. J.R. says, "Are you telling me to hold off on this deal?" And the contact says, "I'm not telling you anything, but hold off until I get back tomorrow." So he is telling J.R. to hold off. Little contradiction there.
I noticed this. How silly. Let's call this one the "bonehead line".

From Kyle Wasko [on the verge of AHN-dom].

- This may be overstepping the bounds of nitpicking, but I find it very unlikely that Pamela would dream about Sue-Ellen having a dream. Although I think the real issue is that the dream was ridiculous and quite out of place. (Some may argue this about the entire 1985-86 season!) [Not me]. Anne mentioned this too. This was pretty dumb.

- Jack sure doesn't look very Greek. You know what? Neither does Dimitri Marinos.

- Dimitri lost track of Jack, but then re-discovered his son in the Dallas Society Column? Does the Society Column have a large circulation in Athens? Just wondering. Another one for the tote board! The media just doesn't have enough to do.

- Jenna's observation that Jack doesn't look like Jamie is overkill. Sometimes the Dallas writers are as subtle as a dumptruck.
I think the only reason they even had this scene is so Jenna wouldn't be a candidate for the Lucy award. And subtlety has never been one of the strong suits of the show.

- J.R. answers a phone that we never hear ring (TNN or production glitch?) I suspect a cut, but it's hard to say. 

From AOL Matt:

- Even though it is a dream, why is Sue Ellen running away in that outfit?  That dress, and the scarf, and those boots?  why not a sweat suit and sneakers? Seems she could run a little faster then. This whole thing was just dumb.

- Then, when Sue Ellen wakes up, she goes crazy.  Does she react the same way to a nightmare as she does to being in Detox?  It seems so. I'll say it again: this whole thing was just dumb.

- And we see Sue Ellen after she woke up, and Angelica, who is in a bathrobe, presumably just woke up, and both women are in full makeup.  Don't these two beauty queens like these two know that they should take their makeup off before bed?  Won't they break out? I don't understand it myself, but Anne did point out this weirdness.

- When Ellie visited Donna, she gave her a dozen roses.  A dozen FAKE roses. Are we supposed to believe that one of the richest women in Texas, who is giving a present to another one of the richest women in Texas, who just happens to be her best friend, and her daughter in law, who just had a miscarriage a dozen FAKE roses?  Unbelievable.
Were they fake? I didn't notice. Thanks a lot!

- When JR was looking for John Ross, are we supposed to believe that he forgot to call Sly and tell her that he would be late for the meeting with Angelica Nero because he was looking for his missing son?  I would accept this from a nitwit like Pam, but not J.R. FREAKING Ewing. That is another very good point.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- When Angelica and J.R. are discussing Jack and Dimitri at the restaurant, Angelica's drink is pretty much untouched for the whole conversation (while it is filled nearly to the top).  Then suddenly, a waiter comes to refill their glasses (even though neither Angelica nor J.R. seems to have summoned him), and Angelica's glass is only half-full.   First Jack, now Angelica.  Gee, this seems to be a common problem when drinking with J.R..  Maybe the Phantom of Ewing Oil has been following him around.
It is always a problem when shooting such scenes.

- I'm very surprised that J.R. let John Ross visit Sue Ellen and Patricia for dinner, especially considering how scared he was in
Tuesday's episode that Sue Ellen might kidnap him again.  But then again, if John Ross didn't go over there, he wouldn't have been tempted to want to choose his mom over his dad (i.e., when Patricia brings the cake out).  J.R. and John Ross must have read the script! I wonder whether this is JR's call. Probably Ellie let him go.

- I've noticed lately that Angelica's accent is lapsing from time to time.   Typically, foreigners whose first language is not English tend to be very careful about pronunciation, but Angelica has been carelessly dropping "G"s at the ends of words (i.e., droppin' instead of dropping, walkin' instead of walking, etc.) and even saying "gonna" in lieu of "going to."  I wouldn't even mind so much if she had the right accent to begin with (q.v. an earlier nit of mine).
Hmm. Interesting. I still think that Angelica is probably named Brenda Goldberg, she's originally from Queens and the whole thing is an elaborate scam.

- Isn't it SO convenient that Jenna just happens to find a picture of Jack's parents right after the scene where Angelica reveals to J.R. that Jack is Dimitri's son. John Rettino outdid himself this time.  I'm surprised he didn't leave an ultrasound photo of Donna's baby lying around when Ray had his silent scene in the Krebbs's nursery.
As Kyle pointed out, subtlety is not a strong point on the show.

- John Ross tells the judge that his daddy [J.R.] taught him how to swim.  Actually, if memory serves, although J.R. did help John Ross with swimming quite a bit, Peter Richards also had a lot to do with teaching John Ross to swim.  John Ross was probably just looking for good things to say about his daddy though, so maybe this is too nitpicky.
It's borderline. I remember before Peter came around JR did have a few scenes in the pool with John Ross. I think Peter Richards is just an experiment that the writers would rather forget - JR doesn't mention Sue Ellen's affair with him, which is odd.

- When Cliff, Jamie, Pam, and Mark are having dinner, the dining room their eating in looks not like the dining area at Cliff's condo, but suspiciously like Cliff's Barnes-Wentworth office (the large window with the Venetian blinds gives it away).
Hey! Good one! I didn't notice!

AHN Jason's corner:

- Observation...Donna seems to have gotten her figure back really quick. She was really bulking out with those pillows right before she miscarried a few episodes back..  I knew she was pillowing!

-Throughout the episode, JR and Pam state that they alone make the decisions in the company, although each only owns 30% of the company.  My question:  Don't the other owners have any input?  I would have thought since Ray, Gary, Jack and Ellie all control a share they would.  Especially after JR makes a comment that he may need Jack's (vote) to overrule Pam...
I think it's understood that Ray, Gary, and Ellie have no interest in running the company and just go along with whatever happens as long as it's not egregiously bad. In theory, if it were necessary, Pam and JR could assemble them together to settle a dispute or something, but this rarely happens in practice on the show. Having Jack around is probably meant to be pressure for Pam, so that she 'feels' overruled, should it come to that.

- Jack tells the waitress at the club he and JR go to to get fetch him a beer...  What kind? I guess he's not picky.

- Bobby's clubhouse looks pretty good considering it was 20-25 years old. Wouldn't the wood have rotted or the nails rusted?  Seems like that happened to my clubhouses when I was little in just a couple of years. Yes! Yes! You are absolutely right! Even though it doesn't rain that much in Dallas, it still does rain. Good call!

- Pam offers the waiting and impatient Angelica coffee (or tea)  after she has been there 15 minutes..  Shouldn't someone have offered it to her before (Of course they may have) Perhaps someone did. I don't know.


Episode 203: En Passant

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 4

Bonehead dialogue of the day:
Jenna: "We were going to be married."
Jack: "I know."
He certainly should know...he was at the Ewing victory party last season when JR announced it!

- It's finally time for a BILC [check the FAQ if this is new to you.] Today's fireside chat between Jack and Jenna qualifies. When Jack provides Jenna with a robe so she can get out of her soggy clothes, she comes out of the bathroom holding it together with her hands so that it doesn't come apart and get the big Ramboski too excited. Now wait a minute. Jack is a fair bit taller than Jenna and certainly quite larger. So certainly his robe can't be too SMALL for Jenna, right? So why does she have to hold it together with her hand, quite provocatively? Because it looks cool and titillates the audience who figures that she might have an 'accident' and the big Ramboski will see her in all her splendor.

AHN Anne pointed out that the framework for Ray and Donna's house wasn't up in past episodes, and he hasn't had much time to work on it recently, so how did he build the whole thing so quickly?
Ray must have latent Tim Allen tendencies. It's a good point.

AHN Jason's corner:

-  It's pick on Grace, the guest star voyeur today....

- How did she manage to not only get Adam's bosses secretary out of commission (but apparently not kill her since she says she will be in tomorrow)  and bypass the temp agency to get the job there just to steal a piece of mail... Grace is obviously a woman of many talents. She probably paid off the secretary - a small amount of cash compared to what she and Angelica plan to get out of the Ewing deal.

- There is a continuity cut when the mail man gives her the mail.  She appears to smile when he starts to hand the mail but when the camera cuts to her face as she accepts the mail, you see her normal frigid face. This may or may not be an error. Grace can probably do that.

- A similar thing happens when Sue Ellen finishes talking to Clayton and Ellie.  She is holding her purse in her left hand in one cut. As she walks to the door you see it under her shoulder and then she takes it back into her hand.... Really? I was busy making notes. Thanks.

- Sue Ellen is still driving Ewing 2.... Well, you would think so, but we never actually see the license plate. It certainly does look like the same car.

- And while she is looking through her mail at Patricia's, did anyone notice in the pile of letters she holds that the bottom letter's flap is unsealed. Not technically a nit but interesting..  Perhaps Patty is reading her daughter's mail.. I did notice this, but thought I'd let it pass. Okay, you've got it.

From AOL Matt: [also on the verge of AHNdom]

- When Ray walks in to his house, he takes his boots off....and puts them on the coffee table.  Even that half-breed Ray Krebbs should know that boots covered in mud, grass, and cow pies do not belong on the coffee table. Yes, you are right. I can't believe I missed this.

- Later, when Ray and Donna are talking in the kitchen, we notice that the roses Miss Ellie gave her are gone.  Now, since those were fake roses, wouldn't they last a while? It's unclear how much time has passed, but it's a good point.

- I always thought that Patricia liked JR.  She always wanted her daughter to be "Mrs. JR Ewing", and even recently she told Sue Ellen to get back with JR, but today told her to get John Ross away from Southfork, where JR was "poisoning his mind".  isn't this an abrupt turnaround?
I'm just glad she's leaving tomorrow for good. This is an abrupt turnaround, but I think she's resigned herself to the fact that Sue Ellen's not going to be his wife any more. She said as much in Episode 202. I think she understands JR very well, and was hopeful that Sue Ellen could bring herself to deal with it the way she feels she could in her daughter's position, but now that it's over, she knows the implications.

- And when Dusty and Sue Ellen were talking, we see Dusty's outfit.  the same outfit he has worn in just about every episode of Dallas.  Can't Dusty, who is the only heir to the immense Farlow Family fortune, afford a different suit?
I guess not. Sheesh. Maybe Jessica was right and Clayton sold him out.

- Also in that scene Dusty called Sue Ellen a wonderful mother?  Wonderful?  I like Sue Ellen a lot, and we all know that she loves John Ross, but wonderful? Wasn't she a complete drunk while pregnant with him?  Didn't she get in a car accident and almost kill him before he was born when she was escaping from the sanitarium?  Hasn't he had several affairs?  Recently, didn't she sleep around with Peter Richards (who was old enough to be her son), and Dusty Farlow?  Wasn't she in an alcoholic rage, sleeping with anyone with a  bottle of vodka?  Wasn't she in the drunk tank, then detox, then in ANOTHER sanitarium?  Didn't she neglect her son when he had appendicitis?  Now, JR isn't the model father, but Sue Ellen is by no means "Wonderful"!!!!
Well, everything you said is true, but I wouldn't say she 'neglected' her son when he had appendicitis - she just happened not to be there at that very second. My mom once sent me to school even after I told her I was feeling sick, because she thought I was faking. I wasn't. That doesn't make her a terrible mother - she's the best! You know what I mean. But I do see your point. Dusty's just saying the right things here.

- At the Mexican restaurant, there was an Italian Flag hanging.  It could have been a Mexican one, but I didn't notice the big symbol in the middle. Really? I didn't notice!

-Another nit about sleeping with full-makeup on.  When Ray came home and Donna (presumably) came right out of bed, or was ready for bed.  Maybe she hasn't taken it off yet, but this is starting to annoy me. It annoys me too. Good call.

Introducing...AHN Kyle's corner:

-. If the Lucy Award could be given to a corporate entity it would have to be Barnes-Wentworth. That whole plot line seems to have vanished. This is an obvious de-push (see? I'm even using the new lingo!)
Hey, great stuff! I didn't realize it would be so popular.

- Is J.R familiar with the expression "there's no sense getting all dressed up for the ball if you don't have a date"? It seems to me that he should have tried to bribe the appeal judge, too. I think you mean the first judge. I totally don't understand it at all. He didn't even try to paint Sue Ellen out to be a bad mother or anything. It's ridiculous.

- Furthermore, Harve Smithfield might be the worst lawyer ever. Maybe the Ewings should get rid of him. 1) He obviously doesn't like J.R. (lots of hostility), and 2) If he can't use the Alcoholism/Sanitarium/Illicit Affairs of Sue Ellen to get an appeal granted, than maybe he's getting a bit too old for the industry.
Agreed, but it doesn't even look like JR consulted him because he was so confident he would get custody. Why he thought so is beyond me because he made no effort.

- What's this, a job for Sue Ellen? What exactly is she qualified for? My instincts tell me that since she's a Ewing, she probably won't stoop to secretarial work, but really, what else can she do? It's too bad they don't pay people to drink vodka...
Obviously she and Patricia can have no idea at this point, but it looks to me like the beginnings of the Valentine Lingerie empire.

- Donna and Ray always seem to re-unite after the most arbitrary and odd occurrences. First it was the Down's Syndrome soccer encounter, than it's Ray's performance as the one man wrecking crew. I guess that shows how much he cares...
Obviously Donna thought so. They really are a boring couple, aren't they?

- Furthermore, when Ray's tearing the house down, he's sweating profusely. Know why? It's cause of those damn long sleeve work shirts! What's the deal with that? I've been to Dallas, and it's (obviously) very, very hot! So why is everyone always working in these chambray work shirts? I just don't get it. Good call!

- You've probably already pointed this out, but there's another time difference glitch between Dallas and Athens. It appears to be morning in both cities. You know what? I missed it today. Thank you so much for reminding me!

AHN Joe S's corner:

- Gee, Pam may have been really busy consulting her "experts" on the Marinos Shipping deal, but she managed to find time to redecorate and paint Bobby's office.  When I first saw her at her desk, I thought she was back at Barnes-Wentworth (the Barnes clan seems to have a fetish for Venetian blinds).
Did she redecorate? I don't remember seeing her at her desk.

- Once again, Donna has managed the distance between the Krebbs's home and the building site for the new house on foot (when she finds Ray tearing the framing down), instead of by vehicle.  At least she isn't pregnant this time.
Yeah, I noticed that too, but forgot to jot down a note.

- It's amazing that Grace manages to find the file on Jason Ewing and Nancy Shaw in the top file cabinet drawer in the very front.  I guess the Adams & Barker agency hasn't been in business very long, as it seems that they've never investigated anybody whose last name came alphabetically before EWING.
Maybe they sort things by date, with the current cases first. That's how I do things at my place, especially with 'unfinished' business.

- A continuity error:  At first, when Jenna is sitting at Jack's fireplace in a bathrobe, the robe is slipped down below her left shoulder so we see her neck, shoulder, and top of her arm.  Then there is a brief cut to the fire.  When the shot returns to Jenna, the robe is suddenly brought up over her shoulder, covering her arm, shoulder, and neck.

- When Ray came in from the storm, he had a large wet spot it the middle of the back of his shirt, and he wasn't soaked anywhere else.  At first I thought it was a sweat stain (Ray seems to get sweat stains in the oddest places -- I remember a recent episode where he had sweat on his back and navel, but no where else, let alone his armpits and chest), but then reference was made to the storm, and I assumed he was wet from the rain.  Yet I wonder how managed to keep all of his clothes dry EXCEPT for the one spot on his back.  Maybe the directors were just trying to keep Ray interesting.
Another eagle-eyed spot. I totally missed this. AHN Mike caught this too.

- When John Ross packs to leave with Sue Ellen, his entire room is cleaned out (save the furniture, of course) except for the wall decorations and pennants.  Why would John Ross take everything else but leave his pennants on the wall, rather than take the pennants with him to hang up in his new room at Sue Ellen's house?  Probably because John Ross realized he would stay on Southfork after all when he READ THE SCRIPT!!! Absolutely correct.

- Hey, by the way, how did Patricia manage to get a house in Dallas (and furnish it) so quickly when she first arrived in Dallas this season? She must know Jack's realtor... Must be a rental. Some of them come furnished, I think.


Episode 204: Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

Bonehead dialogue of the day:

Dusty to Sue Ellen: "You'll just have to RIDE this one out." Nominated by AHN Joe.

- There was some pretty awful cabbageing at the beginning of this episode. For thirty minutes, no one could begin a conversation without talking about Sue Ellen's dramatic decision to leave her son at Southfork. I almost thought Angelica would mention it too, but I guess she doesn't get time to read about these things because she's too busy picking out awful outfits.

- At first, I was going to say that the room from which we see Clayton call his lawyer was new. Then I realized it was part of the newly redecorated Ewing livingroom! When did this happen? Suddenly we see Raoul or Paco or whoever it is coming from all different sides of the room, instead of just from the kitchen and dining area. All this for Sue Ellen's return? Wow.

- I'm trying very hard to understand why JR admits to Sue Ellen that she would lose custody of John Ross if she moved back to the ranch. This is not JR's style. Yes, I know that Sue Ellen can practically read JR like a book and will probably guess that he's up to something anyway, but why come right out and say it? I don't get it.

- When Dusty and Sue Ellen are having dinner, take a look at the guy in the background in the restaurant - the one sitting in the distance beyond her. At one point, Sue Ellen is talking for a continuous forty seconds, and the guy spends the whole time chewing one small piece of meat!

- If anyone out there doesn't think that Ray Krebbs is an uncivilized boor, I beg you to consider this evidence: when Jack comes over to visit him, he tells Jack to get his own beer from the fridge? Just when I was getting some sympathy for him for putting up with Donna's self-pity for so long, he goes and does something like this. Come on, Ray!

- Speaking of conversations centered around dinner, the talk Sue Ellen has with Patricia is weird too. Who arranged the candlelight spread at their house, not to mention all that food, for two people? I don't think they have a maid or anything and Patricia doesn't exactly strike me as being a domestic. Nor does Sue Ellen for that matter. This is weird.

- And by the way, if you look at the table, there appears to be a big plate of delicious fried chicken. All well and good except that neither of the ladies is EATING the fried chicken. What's up with that?

- Let's see. The writers needed another gimmick for Mandy, so they had her find out about Sue Ellen's return to Southfork from Cliff Barnes. All well and good. Except for one thing: they bump into each other because Cliff was picking up his DRY CLEANING from a small corner plaza. HUH? Cliff Barnes, CEO of a rather large oil company, has to go to pick up his own dry cleaning? I know that Cliff's a cheapskate and all that, but this seems ridiculous. I do some consulting for some fairly big companies in downtown Toronto, and believe me, even the Executive Secretaries to the Assistant Vice-Presidents at some places feel that they're much too important to pick up their own dry cleaning.

- Actually, I would let the previous one go if not for one other thing: let's say for sake of argument that Cliff likes to go get his dry cleaning himself. Fine. But at least you would assume that he would go to some place close to his home, right? Looking at the scenery, I would hazard a guess that he's not near the office because it doesn't look like downtown Dallas. So my point is, what the heck is Mandy doing walking around Cliff's neighborhood? Nowhere has it been suggested that Mandy lives near there. Given her line of work, it's unlikely that modeling brought her there. So why is she there?

AHN Anne's corner:

- There is something that really bothers me about Jenna closing up the boutique. Maybe it's that nobody else appeared to be working there. Maybe it's because I don't know one person who can justify locking up at three in the afternoon. Maybe it's because the name of her boutique has nothing to do with clothes or her own name. Maybe it's because her expensive store requires only a sign and a key to keep it safe. Something wasn't quite right. Can you help me put my finger on it?
All three things bothered me. Of course, all of the things can be justified...but it is very strange.

- When J.R. and Sue Ellen met at cocktails, he mentioned that she had given John Ross up that day. Well, if she did, she would have had to come for him in the morning, because she had plenty of time to get her hair done and change clothes before meeting J.R. later on. Sue Ellen had one busy day if we can believe it!
I believe that Sue Ellen did come in the morning, when JR and Angelica were having their meeting. She did have a very busy day...a late afternoon meeting with JR, and then dinner with Dusty. She really gets around! She might [gasp!] have had to skip an AA meeting!

- Ray didn't sneak up on you, Clayton. Even someone very deep in thought could hear Ray pounding behind him. Maybe it's your old age, because those subsidiaries wouldn't make you lose your head.
Yet another one for the OX-files. [Sorry, couldn't resist.]

How could Angelica not sign page three of her contract with J.R.? Isn't it customary to go in order of the pages? Or, when it's a big business venture, do the heads skip around? Did she skip page three? I didn't notice!

- When John Ross came downstairs and said hello to Miss Ellie and Clayton with his mother, I guess that Ellie was in too much of a hurry to kiss Sue Ellen because Junior put his arm up to give her a hug and had to bring it right back down: Miss Ellie kissed him on the cheek and stood up right away to talk to Sue Ellen. Little John Ross got the shaft! LOL! It's tough being a Ewing child sometimes.

- Did you find it bizarre that Mandy Winger said she didn't care about Sue Ellen? For the last god knows how many episodes, her primary concern has been J.R.'s wife. "I just can't help thinking about Sue Ellen.." Mandy is joining the contradictory gang on Dallas, right alongside the champs, Pam and Clayton.

Introducing AHN Matt's corner:

-In the scene where JR and Sue Ellen sit down to eat, Sue Ellen has a big, full head of hair, but in later scenes (namely the one with her eating with Dusty), her hair is much smaller, much less 80's like. Maybe she used less hairspray, but it looks a lot shorter. Sue Ellen's hair is very strange from here till Pam wakes up.

Ray and Jack are both a couple of slobs.  They both drink beers and just fling the bottle caps anywhere.  Now, I pointed out yesterday that Ray has little respect for his property, but Jack should be courteous enough to put the bottle cap in the trash. Well, Ray made him get his own beer, so I guess it serves him right, the inconsiderate host!

-We all know JR likes her looks and not her brains, but how stupid is Mandy Winger?  OBVIOUSLY he is going to choose his son over her, and sane parent would.  What an idiot. Someday I would like to begin a rant about Mandy Winger's stupidity. Unfortunately Geocities only gives me 11 Megabytes of storage space.

- I always thought that Mandy and Cliff were on bad terms, but when they 'bumped' into each other today, they seemed very amicable.  I wonder if Afton would be this nice to Cliff. Well, getting dissed by JR does strange things to people.

AHN Mike's Corner:

- Regarding Sue Ellen getting a job: as we know, she starts a lingerie business after this season. And this is one of my pet peeves about Dallas. Why is it that every character on this show, no matter how unqualified or inexpereinced they are in business can seamlessly become a CEO of any business and be successful? Even Jenna, a society dilettante her entire life, can start up a successful boutique with no problem. Well, give Jenna a season and this will become comical.

- I think we're at the point where Angelica's clothes and hats go from just plain outrageous to comical. Last night's outfit verged on being a female Bozo the Clown costume. Wait till you see today's lineup.

- In the scene in Jack's apartment, was I the only one amazed at how he was instantly able to start a raging fire with just one match and no preparation? At my house, it takes kindling, newspaper, special flame enhance chips and several matches to even get a flicker started. Jack must have got the deluxe model installed. Or maybe the fireplace read the script and realized that Jenna would leave early.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Ray tells Clayton that he needs help picking out quality horses.. hmmm I may be wrong but isn't he a COWBOY  and a RANCH FOREMAN!!  Come on...
This was pretty dumb. It must be tough being a Dallas writer. I can imagine coming to work one day and being told you have to write dialogue for a Clayton story line.

- More of a note than a nit.Steve Kanaly's hair seemed darker today. I think he is combing the darker sides of it over his forehead or he is dyeing part of it. I think the second is true.

- John Ross's fancy dress shoes don't seem to match his outfit.  They are light blue and his suit is dark.  Who dresses him?  Angelica Nero? I didn't notice. Good call.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- Perhaps this is pushing it, but in the first scene in the episode with J.R. and Angelica, J.R. is wearing a different suit than he was previously, but the same tie.   I should think if you're going to change your suit, you should change your tie, too.
I didn't notice. Thanks.

- When Mandy storms into J.R.'s office, it is still presumably during office hours. So why doesn't a secretary try to stop Mandy, or at least follow her in then apologize to J.R.?  Was everyone out to lunch, or did they just stop caring about who storms into J.R.'s office? Excellent! Everyone missed this.

- Not a nit, but I loved it when Jenna completely rejected Jack (I think it was outside of her Boutique).  What made this even better was the classic line she used: "It's me; It's not you." The Big Ramboski REJECTED!!! HA HA HA!!!  This was probably the funniest part of the episode (next to the scene with Jamie and the seamstress).   Maybe Jenna's letdown line should be the line of the day.
I noticed the "It's not you, it's me" thing. Jenna's pathetic sometimes...most of the time. The trouble is it only gets worse from here on in.

- So Patricia gets one of those powerful, meaningful, silent scenes. We see Patricia at her house, packing her bags to leave Dallas, when what does she find?  You guessed it!  A PICTURE of Sue Ellen and John Ross.  How convenient!  Now she's able to stare at the picture and lament for ten minutes (not to downplay the scene -- I thought it was powerful and effective -- but this was a little too convenient).  You know what this means, don't you?  Yes!  John Rettino has been here!!!  Dusty also gets a silent scene (unfortunately, John Rettino must nothave had enough time to plant a picture of Sue Ellen in Dusty's room). Yet when Dusty exits the room (presumably for the last time), he leaves the lights on.  Dusty's apparently not much of a conservationist.
Well, it's a motel room. This is iffy. Good call on John Rettino striking.


Episode 205: Curiosity Killed The Cat

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 1

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Anne]

Sue Ellen: Miss Ellie is something wrong?
Miss Ellie: Is it that obvious?
Well, yeah, Miss Ellie it is kind of obvious, being that you have a faraway look in your eye and are unusually laconic! On this show, it is incredibly apparent when someone has a problem. They broadcast it, if not in so many words, don't you think?

First, a guest editorial RANT by AHN Joe S:

Whatever gave Mandy the idea that she was more important to J.R. than John Ross when she says, "Then you've chosen him over me,"?  Does Mandy honestly believe that J.R. is going to say the hell with his 6-year-old son, his own flesh-and-blood, just for her?  Please!  Mandy is on the wrong T.V. show.  She doesn't belong on Dallas, she belongs on Jerry Springer.
When Mandy's character was first introduced, I didn't have much of a problem with her character.  In fact, I thought she was a great plot contrivance at first, with J.R. and Cliff both using her for personal gain.  Nor could I stand why so many Dallas fans hated her.  However, I expected her to just leave Dallas eventually, sick and tired of Cliff and J.R.. But then J.R. fell in love with her, and she stuck around. That's when things really went downhill.  I should have known Mandy was trouble when she was first introduced.  I mean, she falls in love with some guy at a bar on first meeting him, and he's dead drunk!  What does that say about Mandy to begin with?   The writers really goofed with Mandy.  At least we felt sorry for Afton (though it took a while), because Audrey Landers is a good actress and the writers eventually gave her decent material.  You could feel all the pain she felt when Cliff treated her like crap.  But Mandy isn't nearly as good an actress.  I swear, she acts like a porn star in every scene she's in!  Every time I see her (usually with some very pouty expression on her face), I expect to see everyone rip off their clothes while some really bad rock music plays in the background.  I would die a happy man if, during another "passionate" scene with Mandy, Jim Davis burst through the door and "put her in her place."  Then he would yell at J.R. for getting involved with such a bad actress.

Great stuff! LOL! I think you're dead on, especially about the fact that, as 'the Rock' would say, Mandy needs to know her role and shut her mouth.

- Not a nit, just an observation: Pam finally got around to putting her name on her office door.

- Watch carefully after Grace re-enters the elevator at the Oil Baron's Club. The door begins to close even before Grace pushes the floor button. Lest you say that maybe it's on a timer or something, let me remind you that there is about forty seconds of dialogue between the time the door opens and Grace re-enters. That seems awfully long. The door must have read the script.

- When JR asks Jenna where Jack is, he refers to them as an 'item'. Now how would anyone get this impression? That cold fish has never even kissed him! I can't believe how badly the big Ramboski gets shafted by this temperamental tease in a dress.

- Mandy says she saw JR leave Angelica's house at 5 AM in the morning. What? It's way too bright outside to be 5 in the morning at any time of year! Except perhaps at the North Pole on June 21.

- And speaking of this, if Mandy really stayed up until 5 AM waiting for JR, shouldn't there be some wicked bags under her eyes? And she's remarkably well-rested in the morning!

- AHN Anne and I both wondered how the guy from the Woodgrove School knew Donna was at Southfork? Anne also wondered how he knew that Donna had lost her baby. Did she leave a note on the door: "Miscarried and moved into the big house?"

AHN Anne's corner:

- Just had to mention that when Cliff says to Mandy "You don't care about Sue Ellen?" she says, "Of course I do!" Some peace of mind for me on that one, because she has contradicted herself at least three times on that front now.
See Joe's rant above.

- Did you think it was funny that Ray and Donna could just get into the house so easily? We heard the door open and shut and then they were there. It seemed as though the help had gone home by this time, so that can only mean that the Ewings leave their front door open. Are they nuts?!
Yes, they are nuts. Good call!

- Since when does Grace join in on business lunches? I realize that she needed to be there in order to meet the detective, but it's still a contradiction.
No, it's actually classic plot trickery! It's very subtle, but she's never been at a business meeting before. So why is she there now? So she can run into Sam Barker. Classic. And I missed it. Thank you.

- I couldn't help but cringe when Donna and Ray were standing in their flooded living room and just contemplating the thought of building a new house, no resentment whatsoever that their things were ruined. On a personal note, I as a Minnesotan was victimized by a huge flood in 1987, and losing half my baby pictures and well as my mom's high school and college diplomas, among other things, was not something I could shrug off that easily. Are the Krebbses human?
This isn't real life...it's Dallas. This is a great point though.

- So whose bedroom are Pam and Mark sleeping in now? It looks like Mark got new linens if it's his.
I noticed that too, and the only thing odd about it is that it indicates that the hired help is doing its work by changing the sheets once in a while.

Back after a long absence...AHN NIS's corner:

The last time John Ross was jumping on the bed Sue Ellen scolded JR for getting him worked up before bedtime, now it seems to be OK (maybe because she was putting him to bed or because he's seven now).
That was a long time ago..you still remember that?

- As JR was sorting through Jack's mail you can see a flap open on a letter. What's up with the Dallas mail?
I didn't notice this but it appears to be quite common on the show.

- Seemed like a large story in the paper for Pete's partner that met with the accident. So soon after his death too.
Agreed. Another one for the tote board.

- JR didn't press 'end' on the cell phone when he hung up after talking with Sly. Maybe he doesn't have to.
I bet he does and he just conveniently forgot.

- Mandy didn't seem to step very far into the bathroom to flush the bracelet down the toilet.
No she did not. Good call. I'm trying hard to refrain from making some snide remarks here.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Mandy and the bracelet...   I found it a bit hard to believe that she would keep the bracelet in the box on the kitchen counter..  This is a woman who obviously appreciates jewels.  I am really surprised she wouldn't keep it in a jewelry box or something...

- How deep was the water in the Krebbs house?  Ray said he opened the door and they walked into what looks like mid way between their ankles and knees deep water..   Wouldn't it all gush out the door once it was opened?
Yes it would...unless it was already that deep outside.

Soon to be AHN Jake's corner:

- After Jenna goes through telling Jack that she doesn't want to see him anymore -- and quite clearly, I might add -- Jack says, "I'll call you in a few days."   Obviously he doesn't get the picture.  Jenna is sorry that she strung him along, but she is not interested in him.  If I were him, I wouldn't tell a woman who doesn't want to see me anymore "I'll call you in a few days." Yes, you're right. The whole thing is just to get Jack angry and make Jenna look like a total bitch. It serves both purposes well.

- Jack tells Jamie that he is going to leave town for a indefinite amount of time.   Why? she asks.  He says it has to do with Jenna and working at Ewing Oil.   I know it has something to do with Jenna, and I know he's not the office type, but just a few episodes ago he agreed to go on staff at Ewing Oil for about six months.   And why would a guy just about to go in on a big cattle ranching venture -- something he loves to do, from what we've seen -- skip town?  I think he's a little obsessed with Jenna. Definitely. But you've got to forgive the big Ramboski. I mean...though I get on her case for being such a stupid character sometimes, Jenna is an absolutely gorgeous woman! If she expressed interest in me, you can be damn sure I'd want to return it in kind. Not only that, but with the absence of Bobby, Jack is by all accounts the most attractive man on Dallas [according to the ladies]. The guy deserves a break...and not a heartbreak.

- I don't understand why Clayton's in big financial trouble.  Were did this come from?  From what we've seen, he's a pretty good business man, so why the selling off of his subsidiary. companies?  I know he wants to retire, but Clayton's a logical and practical man -- no reason to sell when the market's bad.  He must be in a lot of trouble... I think he is in a lot of trouble. I also think it has to do with the fact that he hasn't done much for his businesses since he moved in to Southfork. It becomes more clear later, if I'm not mistaken.

- After the luncheon at the Oil Baron's Club between Ewing Oil and Marinos Shipping, the parties get off on another floor.  The sign next to the elevator reads, "Oil Baron's Club". I was aware the restaurant was called "Oil Baron's Club", not the entire building.  We always see the same scene when they are eating, so I doubt the restaurant takes up the entire building.  It's very unlikely that the offices or whatever else is in the building goes under the title "Oil Baron's Club".
Yeah, I wasn't sure what to make of this. Something about this bothered me. Thanks.

- The writers of "Curiosity" took the murder of the private detective a little lightly, don't you think?  We find out that Grace killed a man so there'd be no complications in her and Angelica's little scheme, and there's not even any big dramatic music to accompany the surprise.  The Marinos Shipping deal is the biggest storyline (although Sue Ellen's addiction held that title early on in the season -- in my opinion the best this year), so what's with the no-big-deal attitude?
This is just to make Grace look like a bad-ass woman you don't want to mess with.

- I find it very odd that Mandy disposed of J.R.'s necklace in a toilet. I understand she didn't want it, but flushing it down the toilet -- come on! It may not burn in a fire, but if I were her, I would have smashed it against the wall or something, then threw it in the garbage.  She probably didn't want J.R. to see it, though, or have some bum find it in the landfill.  Still, there was something weird about it.  But even more weird, the sound of the toilet flushing was very muffled -- like she only pushed it halfway. Either that or it broke when she threw the necklace in it and flushed -- a really dumb thing to do!  It might not go down!
You know...if this were a Seinfeld episode, this would have been what caused the Krebbs' water main to go belly up! And then we would have had JR at the end of the episode looking into the camera and muttering "Newman!". Check out AHN Joe's rant about Mandy in the nitpick section today. For the real world, it just sounded like the sound mixer guy turned the volume down for some reason.

- At episode's end, Mandy tells Cliff that "J.R.'s hurt me for the last time.   Now I'm going to do it to him."  As far as I know, this is the first thing he's done that would hurt her.  Sure, he's spied on her once at a restaurant she was modeling at, but nothing like this. Well, JR did refuse to commit to her last season, but you're right. That's hardly significant.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- Cabbage-a-riffic!!! Starting with John Ross bouncing on his bed yelling "Mommy's home! Mommy home!" and finishing with J.R and Sue Ellen's discussion outside his room, the first three minutes of the show were (ridiculously and obviously) chockfull of rehash.

-. After Phyllis hands Pam the package from Matt Cantrell she then asks Pam: "would you like me (Phyllis) to open it?". Now Pam may be inept when it comes to the oil business, but she's not that inept... Hey...we have no direct evidence of Pam's business competence.

- While trying not to insult the dead, what kind of a sissy bar drink was Sam Barker drinking when Grace approached him? Last time I checked, they only include maraschino cherries with Shirley Temples' (or Roy Rogers' for those of you south of the border). I wasn't paying attention to the drink. Good call!

AHN Joe S's corner:

- When J.R. leaves the Oil Baron's club (with Pam, Angelica, and Grace), the hat check girl gives J.R. his hat.  You'll notice that J.R.'s hat was just lying underneath a tray in a very small place all by itself.  I'm surprised no one else in the restaurant has hats in check, as well as the fact that the hat check area is so small (room enough for one hat).  Maybe there is no official hat check, but they make an exception for J.R..  Who knows? Great point!

- When Cliff makes a call from his office (I think it's Mandy that he calls), he dials seven numbers.  However, I thought that the Barnes-Wentworth offices were connected by five digit extensions. Therefore, wouldn't Cliff have to dial "9" first to get an outside line (i.e., eight numbers)? Yes he would. Thanks. I didn't notice.

- When Mandy drops her bracelet in the toilet and flushes, she reaches to the right to flush with her right hand.  However, don't most (if not all) American toilets have the flush handle on the right side of the toilet (your left if you're facing the toilet).   Therefore, Mandy should have to reach to her left (probably with her left hand) to flush the toilet .Perhaps the camera image was reversed in a mirror or something. Interesting.

AHN Matt's corner:

- I have posted two nits already about Ray's neglect of his own personal property, and I am aware that he is a Ewing, but he just barges in?  No doorbell, no knock.   Just walks in.  He is family, but this is an unexpected visit, and at a strange hour, and it is very rude to just walk in the house. What was also rude was when he comes in, he just says, we need to spend the night here.  He was never known for his politeness, but isn't a please in order?

- And then Clayton says that he will get Ellie up.  Is it really that important to wake her up?  can't Raoul or Theresa show them to a room, or can't Clayton or Sue Ellen get a couple of sheets and some extra pj's?

- How could Donna's dress be wet the way it was?  Wasn't Ray carrying her over the threshold?  If you say that he put her down while in the house then that would make no sense.  He would've opened up the sliding door, and water would've poured out, and he would've put her down outside.

- When Ray and Donna are sitting in their flooded house, are we supposed to believe that they would leave all their furniture and stuff in there to rot? And wouldn't they have some pumps getting the water out of there?  Idiots. This is great stuff, man! Ray is well on his way to becoming an oxling, in Clayton Farlow fashion.

- When Jack is gathering his stuff together to skip town, did anyone else notice how funny he bounces around.  I think that the padding in his jeans make him walk very strange. Another thing about Jack.....He only needs 1 suitcase?  With a large apartment like that, I would think that he has more clothes than just a few shirts. No pants?  No SOCKS? LOL! This is great.

- When Cliff is bribing the man from the hotel, we notice that he put the money in an envelope to be discreet.  Then why take the money out in full view and count it?   Doesn't that defeat the purpose of being discreet?
Yes it does. Good call.

- Just something that struck me as being funny... Sue Ellen says that 'No one has ever offered me a job before,' The fact that Sue Ellen was offered a job as the head of the fundraising just shows that this MUST be a dream.  She does have experience with those DOA clubs, but the HEAD of fundraising?  That's pushing it.
Someone else [maybe it was you] pointed out how it seems that whenever anyone does anything, they do it from the top down. Donna's first foray into the oil business is as a CEO. Jenna gets to own her boutique without really having any sales experience. And so on and so on.

- Also in the scene with JR and Angelica, the bellhop, or whatever he is, just walks in.   No knock? Nothing?  Where did he learn how to do this?  Ray Krebbs?
LOL! You almost expect him to come out and say he lost his key or something.

- I don't want to get into specifics, because it is gross, but most things that are flushed in a toilet are soft, and are broken up in the water pressure, so that they can flush, but wouldn't a gold/diamond bracelet clog the drain? Or at least take a couple of flushes?? Yup. You're right

Episode 206: The Missing Link

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 0. [He was in one scene]

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Anne]

Miss Ellie: Clayton's in some kind of trouble.
Punk: What kind of trouble is he in?
Well if she knew that, she wouldn't be wasting her time with you, now would she Punk?

- When Mandy calls Cliff, she holds the phone in such a way that it's difficult to see what she's doing. But I don't think she dials seven numbers...looks like more. Can anyone else tell?

- All of the AHNs caught the nonsense at the breakfast table. Sue Ellen took some orange juice and some food and consumed none of it. She didn't even allow her growing son to have breakfast, the most important meal of the day. Both Kyle and Anne thought it wasn't anything to worry about because John Ross is so excited about having his mom drive him to school that he yells "Neat-O!". Jason pointed out that Jenna, who had maybe three bites, even had the nerve to dab her clean lips before she leaves. You know, for all of the nice things that I say about Jenna, she's a real bitch sometimes, especially with her daughter. Can't Charlie pick her own breakfast? Jenna immediately tells Teresa to get them both some eggs. Everyone knows I try not to be indelicate on the nitpick page, but I'll make an exception here. Jenna must be having a EXTREMELY long time of the month!

- Matt Cantrell quietly strolls in to Ewing Oil, expecting to surprise his old friend Bobby Ewing. He asks Phyllis to be quiet so as not to ruin the surprise. Sly plays along. Okay. That's fine. But where the heck is Kendall? She's the receptionist, right? So shouldn't she be 'receptionisting'? Or is she conveniently absent today, and Doris the temp couldn't make it either?

- I will never understand why JR keeps asking Pam to let him know when Jack calls. Why her? She's not a secretary. If Jack calls, the first person to know about it will be either Sly or Phyllis. Not Kendall, since she's taking a holiday, I guess.

- Not a nit, just a side note: Donna's bought a Cadillac. I guess that oil company was a good investment. AHN Jake pointed out that she loved that oil company (spent ten million on it), and told Ray she didn't want to be just a housewife, so what about it?  I can understand when she was pregnant she couldn't go down to the oil drilling site, but they never even mentioned it.  It's just what happened to Pam's exercise place that she owned -- it just disappeared.

- I'll have to review the summaries, but I don't believe that Jerry Kenderson has met Sue Ellen Ewing. This is her first day on the job, yet he calls her "Mrs. Ewing", without being introduced to her by Mark, as if they've met before.

- As was pointed out by Kyle in yesterday's episode, Phyllis needs to know her role. After giving Pam the letters that Bobby wrote to Mark, she hangs around in the office waiting for Pam to say something. Would it not be more appropriate, charming and delightful Phyllis, to leave your boss alone with your former boss's private letters?

- Okay, let's review our Dallas history, shall we? Eleanor Farlow. She was married once before, I think...yes, she was. A fellow named Jock Ewing. Nice guy. Texas born and bred, in fine macho tradition, a real man's man. She bore him three strong sons...well, two strong ones and that one that ran off to California. But I digress. Are you with me so far? Good.
Punk Anderson tells her that her current husband is in financial trouble and Ellie is surprised, nay, flabbergasted, that he would not come to her and ask for her help in this situation. Someone please explain how this makes any sense. This woman was once married to Jock FREAKIN' Ewing, and she doesn't understand the whole male ego thing? Give me a break.

- It was probably unavoidable, but when the pile of oil drums falls on 'Jamie', you can clearly see that her stunt double has a ponytail, which Jamie does not. Nice try, but the producers never reckoned with the power of the nitpickers.

- That Mark Graison. He opens up a research clinic and suddenly he's "Mr. Blood Type." As soon as the doctor says that they've run out of blood to keep Jamie going, Mark says "You don't have any AB negative?" How the heck does he know that Jamie has AB negative blood? Cliff was the only one around when the doctor mentioned Jamie's blood type. Has Mark developed a habit of casually asking people what kind of blood type they have? AHNs Kyle and Jake caught this as well.

- I'm going to need some feedback on this one. Another history lesson, this one about Wentworth Tool and Die. When Rebecca Wentworth passed away, she split the company equally among her three children. In Episode 160, Cliff sold his share of the company to Katherine. In Episode 191, mean old Kathy killed Bobby before jobbing to death herself. With me so far? Good.
Now someone please explain why Pamela Ewing only owns 25% of the company, as she herself states. She started out with 33%, right? So what happened?
And more importantly, how the heck did Cliff get himself involved with the company again? He sold his share to Katherine. Katherine died. Are we to believe that she left Cliff part of the company? She hated Cliff, to the point where she tried to frame Cliff for shooting Bobby. Someone please unravel this mess!

From the newsgroup, Leo Black found: During the 11/24/98 episode Pam and Matt Cantrell were watching a football scrimmage. When the scene cut to the players on the field, I noticed the film was backwards - all the jersey numbers were reversed!! Check it out if you have it on tape. Pam sure has strange dreams!! I can't believe we all missed this.

AHN Anne's corner:

- Matt Cantrell did not go over very big with me, but I won't rant too much about him. My main nit is that he called Bobby his best friend. He remembers Jenna, which implies that he was around years ago when Bobby and she were dating; also Miss Ellie asks what he's been up to all these years. So he's been gone forever, obviously not kept in touch with Bobby, if the latter's death is news to him, and yet he and Bobby were best buds?
That might be explained by the fact that he was in the jungles of Colombia...but how the heck does he not know Pam? They were married for quite some time! He knows Ellie and Jenna, but not Pam?

- Mandy tells Cliff to meet him at the park by the bridge. That wall behind her was not a bridge. It's amazing that Cliff found her! Must be her radiant aura.

- Is it just me or is Mark a bad companion for Pam? Before you go off on your list of reasons why that's true, let me clarify: I'm referring to his refusal to listen to her problems from the office. She really needs someone to talk to and I think he's being unreasonable for not helping her out.
Thanks for not getting me started. I agree. I never really liked Mark that much at all.

- When Jamie and Cliff kissed, I noticed that Jenilee Harrison opened her eyes right before the cut. That kind of cracked me up: How soon is this over?

- Since J.R.'s door was open when Angelica left, wouldn't we as the viewing audience be able to hear Sly's voice from outside as well as the intercom? Absolutely correct.

- Okay, one more nit for Matt. Where does he get off yelling at the football team on the field? Unless he's the coach (and that would make no sense since he's heading right back down to South America), he should keep his big mouth shut. I'm surprised one of the players didn't tell him as much. Agreed. Go Vikings!

AHN Jason's corner:

- I laughed when Mandy tells Cliff that she doesn't want to be seen with him yet she meets him IN A PARK to discuss business.  And what about their dinner a few episodes back? Check out the Poll of the week if you want to gripe about Mandy.

- Did anyone notice that the doctor only asks Cliff and Sue Ellen if Jamie has any brothers or sisters?   What about her parents?  and several of her cousins are in the area.   Blood types are hereditary but not exclusive to siblings...Since her life is in danger, you'd think they would try every option..   She is a Ewing (by blood, snicker snicker)... Agreed. It's just a gimmick to make Jack's departure more ominous.

- I still say that Pam running Ewing Oil is a conflict of interest..  Her tiff with JR today seems to show how having a control in each company could affect her decisions in the other.. This is a tough one. Obviously if it were not for the Barnes/Ewing feud it would not be an issue. But it's clouded by the fact that Wentworth Tool and Die and Ewing Oil are not DIRECT competitors. Ewing Oil doesn't make machinery, it uses it. It's a very grey area.

Introducing...AHN Jake's corner:

- Someone on the web page mentioned that we never get a look at Barnes-Wentworth this year.  They said they probably didn't use the set.  Well, tonight, when Cliff was talking in his office to Mandy, I could clearly see his bar in the background.   It looks like they are using the set. Good call.

- Hasn't J.R. wondered what happened to Mandy's bracelet?  It was very expensive, and he just bought it for her.  That's a pretty big thing to overlook. Good point, again.

- What was the deal with the scene at the football practice?  It seems like Matt Cantrell goes on forever about how he and Bobby used to play football -- going into the details and positions of the game itself.  For someone who liked cheerleaders more than the game, he sure talks a lot about it.  And I doubt Pam was too interested in it all, unless she's a closet Cowboys fan. I think he's just being modest...he was all-conference twice. And you're right about Pam's being too interested.

- Clayton wanted to keep his selling of his companies secret, yet Punk Anderson found about it.  Unless Punk Anderson is also a private eye, I find it pretty odd how he uncovered such discreet business dealings.
Clayton should fire that lawyer right away. You're right. Punk shouldn't have been able to find that much out.

- In the final scene, after J.R. tells Mandy he is going to take a shower and kisses her, he leaves the room, exiting away from the curtain in the back. Yet, a few moments later, he opens the curtain discreetly and sees Mandy looking at some folders about his deal with Marinos Shipping.  I was aware going through the curtain was the only way into the bathroom.  How did he get there?  And did J.R. suspect Mandy, or did he catch her in the act?  If he didn't have a hunch that his mistress was going behind his back, then why did he open the curtain so as not to be noticed?  Or is it his practice to peek into a room before he walks in?  I think he had a hunch, and I think it's going to be more fun this way...wait till you see what JR does.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- If Matt Cantrell really did consider Bobby his best friend, why didn't he try to contact him (Bobby) over the past year? First, he should have called to give Bobby updates on his investment (yes, he was in Colombia, but they have phones there). Secondly, if Bobby was his closest friend, than he should have called just to keep in touch. Strange...
And Pam should know him and he should know Pam. This is strange...and stupid.

- A couple of gripes about the Dallas hospital system. Why are doctors and nurses always leaving patients alone that are in critical condition. If they're hooked up to an EKG chances are they are still in danger. And yet the doctors and nurses always LEAVE so that a Ewing (or in this case, a Barnes) can visit. Then the patient FLATLINES! This keeps happening!! Well, otherwise it would be pretty boring, wouldn't it?

AHN Joe S's corner:

- In case any of you were asleep, there is a hugely obvious BILC in the beginning of the episode, which begins by showing Mandy's legs.  In this scene, Mandy is nude at first, then we see her get dressed into a slinky nightie.  However, Mandy's attire (or lack of it) doesn't advance the plot one bit.  So why include this scene?   Because It Looks Cool!!! (Although I will admit, this scene is a great attention-grabber for the start of the show). Absolutely. BILC. It got my attention.

- When Jenna and Charlie are talking about Jack on the SF stairs, they stop towards the bottom of the staircase briefly, then continue on. When they resume moving. Charlie steps in front of her mother, taking the lead into the dining room.  However, when we see the Wades enter the dining room, we see Jenna in front of Charlie.  Somewhere between the bottom of the stairs and the dining room, did Jenna shove Charlie out of the way and step in front of her just to create a continuity error? Lately, it wouldn't surprise me.

- Matt Cantrell tells Pam that he will call her the next day, but that may prove hard to do since he didn't ask for her number.  He might mean that he'll call her at her office, but why doesn't he just get her direct office line number while he's there rather than have to bother looking up the Ewing Oil number in the phone book and go through the secretaries? Good point. But maybe Pam doesn't have a direct incoming line. Many executives don't, though JR does for private calls.

-  Boy, does that Matt Cantrell have a keen eye or what?  When he arrives on Southfork, he instantly recognizes Jenna, even though (a) he hasn't seen Jenna in years, (b) he has no reason to suspect that Jenna would even be on Southfork, and (c) Jenna has undergone two separate plastic surgeries since he last saw her.  Maybe more.   Perhaps Jenna looked like Suzanne Somers before "Dallas" was even on the air.  Who knows? That's great! I forgot to use the plastic surgery angle here.

- Is Jerry Kenderson channeling J.R.'s spirit?  When Jerry is talking to Sue Ellen and Mark Graison, he mentions that he's not very good at raising money, but very good at spending it.  This remark is similar to a comment J.R. made to Sue Ellen that very morning concerning her money-management skills.  A few seconds later, when Sue Ellen tells Jerry that people feel richer when they're dressed up, Jerry replies with the J.R.-patented, "Is that a fact?" Interesting.

- The doctor at the hospital tells Cliff that Jamie's loss of blood is especially serious for her because of her blood type -- AB negative -- insinuating that it is a rare blood type and thus extremely difficult to find suitable blood to give her to match it.   Now part of this is true: type AB blood is very rare indeed.  However, rarely does the blood of the donor have to exactly match the blood of the receiver.  There are four types of blood:  type O (the most common of all blood types), type A, type B, and type AB (for the sake of simplicity, I'll leave out the positive/negative Rhesus factor).  Type O patients can only receive blood from type O donors.  Type A patients can only receive blood from type O and type A donors.  Likewise, Type B patients can only receive blood from type O and type B donors.  However, type AB patients are known as "universal receivers" (just as type O patients are known as "universal donors").  This is because they can accept blood from all four blood types.  Therefore, Jamie should actually be very lucky to have that blood type, and it should be no problem to give her blood, since she can take any blood type.   Actually, it shouldn't be much of a problem anyway regardless of her blood type, because type O blood can be given to all four blood types, and type O is the most common of all blood types.  Apparently, the writers never paid attention in Biology class (or maybe Pam didn't pay attention -- it's her dream, after all), nor did they even bother to check their facts.  There is ABSOLUTELY NO WAY the logic presented here could work.  It is in direct conflict with scientific fact.  This whole plot contrivance is completely bogus. Well, ordinarily I would totally agree with you but at least the writers make an effort. In the next episode they will invoke a very 'rare antigen' in Jamie's blood which is a difficult cross-match. I do not believe that such an antigen exists in normal, healthy people, but at least they're trying.

- Of course, the worst part was when the doctor came back and claimed that none of the AB negative blood they had was "a close enough match" and she needs an immediate family member's blood.  Oh, please!  Jack may not even have the same blood type as Jamie anyway (not that it should really matter, but if it didn't, it would contradict the writers' own logic).  Without getting too technical, for Jack to DEFINITELY have type AB blood as well, one of Jack and Jamie's parents would have had to have purebred type A blood, while the other would have had to have purebred type B blood.  If one of their parents had hybrid blood or type AB blood, then it would be possible for Jack to have a blood type other than AB.  But apparently the writers didn't take that into account, and believe donating blood is like donating a vital organ.
Or maybe it's simpler than that.  Maybe the writers realized they needed to add such a plot twist to get Jack back into the picture when they READ THE SCRIPT (if that's not a great paradox, I don't know what is)!!!
This is simply a contrivance, plain and simple. You're dead on there.


Episode 207: Twenty-Four Hours

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3.

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Kyle]

Cliff: Did you see her?
Jack: Yes, they let me see her for a minute. She didn't even know I was there.

No kidding? Well Jack, she is in a coma.

- I would be completely remiss if I didn't mention that the Professor somehow managed to get off the island! First it was Ginger, who came back under the identity of Julie Grey and was JR's secretary and sex kitten in Season One. Now the Professor is here, as the new sheriff in town! Are Gilligan and Maryann on their way too?

- Something that's bothered people for a while got even muddier today. Apparently, Jenna's hired an employee to take care of the boutique while she grieves over Bobby and toys with the Ramboski's emotions. I'm still not sure what to make of this.

- Yet again, Sly shows a bit of Jackie in her. After JR finishes talking to the Professor, Angelica waltzes in to his office without a word from the secretaries. What gives?

- Take a look at Matt when he arrives at the hospital. He looks totally grungy! Hasn't he had time to take a shower? But then when he walks out of the hospital he looks squeaky-clean again. I guess the folks at the blood bank took the time to disinfect him.

- And that's not all they did. Look carefully at the bandage Matt has when he goes to his car. The bandage is right around his elbow joint! This is ridiculous. It should be much lower, on his upper forearm. That's normally where blood is drawn from.

- Whatever hospital this is, it's strange. Did anyone notice the 'Cafeteria' sign above a door in the waiting room? A cafeteria, next to the ICU waiting room? HUH? Does this seem right?

AHN Jake's corner:

- Speaking of Matt, I am finding it very hard to believe that he did not hear about Bobby's death until he came to Dallas.  His close friend? Obviously Matt liked the emeralds a little more.
I'm not too sure what to make of this, but this seems to be a popular opinion. It's possible that he was incommunicado for a while.

- When Jenna was leaving her shop with Donna, I noticed it was a different building then they used a few episodes back when Jack came to see Jenna, who was having problems locking the door.  Don't tell me she moved just because of those darn locks! I thought it was a different building too, but it could just look like a different place because they filmed it from a different angle. I'm not sure.

- When Cliff is watching the news at the hospital, he sees J.R. offering a reward for finding Jack.  When it is done, he phones Mandy and asks if she was watching the news.  Yes, she was, and the same channel.  I find that to be a little too convenient.  Afternoon news broadcasts don't draw extremely large crowds -- and it is not too often you find someone on 'Dallas' watching the tube -- especially someone like Mandy.
It is very convenient. You're right. Maybe Mandy doesn't have cable.

- When Jenna was in Jack's apartment, she noticed pictures related to fishing hanging above his desk -- and got the idea where he could be.  I never noticed them before.   Yes, that's a minor detail, but the people behind 'Dallas' do a lot of setting-up (foreshadowing things to come), and it seems to me like the whole storyline involving Jamie's accident wasn't planned.  Not to say there's anything wrong with it -- the storyline just plays to me that is was thought up as it was written.
Yeah, I hear you. This season they had to do a lot of fancy footwork to accommodate certain things. Certainly propmaster John Rettino had his hands full with stuff like this. We've never really gotten a good look at this part of Jack's apartment before, though.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- Why would the research center have a better blood bank than a hospital? That really doesn't make much sense.
They probably don't, but at this point anything's worth a try.

- Sue Ellen's bit about donating blood was just so lame and corny (not that it isn't a good cause). They're sure trying to make her look like a caring person again, aren't they? The cabbageing and public service announcement were very egregious indeed. That said, please do go out and donate blood when you get the chance.

- Does it really take 7 and a quarter hours to test someone kidneys? Watch the beginning of the episode (8:00 am) when they take the test, and then later on (3:15 PM) when they get the results.
Actually, it's 8 PM and then 3:15 PM - 19 hours! Sometimes very technical tests can take this long - and they certainly did 13 years ago.

AHN Anne's corner:

-Where is Grace from? She has an accent, but not as thick as Angelica's and she doesn't look Greek.
I'm not sure where Grace is from...she and the Ramboski will get fairly intimate soon but I don't know if they talk about this.

- Would Cliff really be so tolerant of the Ewings? He hates all of them, yet they're hanging around the hospital like a plague. I'd be ticked if I were him.
This is the 'Dynasty' nit. Everyone on Dynasty hates each other until someone gets sick and suddenly they're all lovey-dovey. At least JR isn't around to get on his nerves.

- When Ellie suggested that everyone go to bed, Ray just ignored her and talked about Jack going to see about a horse. That was rude! Good call.

- Donna has not been thinking about being a volunteer for a long time, as Ray said. Maybe a week tops.
Yes. Good point.

AHN NIS's corner:

-Speaking of the professor ..er.. The Sheriff - it looked like he only pressed three numbers on the Southfork phone.
I'll double check.

- Shouldn't someone have called to prepare the Ewing jet for Ray?
Unless it was already on standby for some reason. This is a good question.

-How did Miss Ellie know that Clayton was selling 'two' companies. Did Punk tell her this?
I will double check this too.

AHN Joe's corner:

- No one (i.e., a secretary) tries to stop Angelica Nero when she barges into J.R.'s office. Good one.

- When Cliff dials from the pay phone, he doesn't wait for his quarter (or whatever the price was in texas at the time) to register before dialing.  Usually, it takes a few seconds (at least, it does in my dealings with pay phones).

- Hmm... in the previous episode, Matt seemed to not know of Pam's existence before he heard of her after he sent her the emerald.  But today, he relates to Pam that Bobby (who remember, is dead right now) told him that Pam's "one in a million."   How would he know this?


Episode 208: Twenty-Four Hours

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 1

- The APEX 2000 really bothers me. In 1985, most of us were lucky if we could afford a 286 computer! The 386 chip was just being introduced and was only available in superservers. 4 Megabytes of RAM was an outlandish amount, and you couldn't buy a hard drive bigger than 500 Megabytes - and even that would be several thousand dollars. However, Graison Research can afford this unbelievable machine, with 20 Megabytes of RAM and 5 Gigabytes of hard drive space.
Even if you grant that Mark Graison must have special friends at IBM, Intel, Microsoft, and Seagate who owe him favors, I find it very hard to believe that a facility that could spend this much money on a computer has to resort to fund-raising dinners.

- And I really think they got shafted anyway! If you look at the computer screen that we are shown, you'll find it very closely resembles that of a PC Junior! Remember those? I do. They were XT-class machines with 256K of RAM and no hard disk.

- And when the APEX 2000 searches its database for names, they appear in a random order...not alphabetical, or sorted by any criteria that I can tell. If I were doing this, I'd want to sort alphabetical by last name at least.

- It's hard to tell for sure, but for most of the time that Fred and JR are banging on the keyboard of whatever this thing is, the keystroke sounds don't seem to match what's happening on the screen.

- And today the other shoe falls, from five seasons ago! Back in Episode 55, after he was shot, we were told that JR's blood is a difficult cross-match for transfusion [sound familiar?]. Well, today we learn that he has O positive blood - the most common type in the world! If I were JR, I'd sue that incompetent doctor for fraud!

- And in the continuing vein of public service announcements: Mandy puts on her seat belt before driving away from her meeting with Cliff.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- The whole computer thing gave me a funny feeling. Mostly it was the logistics behind the blood database that bothered me. First of all, by consulting my Young Students Encyclopedia (circa 1982), I was able to find that the population of Athens was 870,000. Now it's nearly 1986 on Dallas, so we'll have to factor in potential growth... let's say there would be about a million Athenians at the time of the episode. How uncommon a name is Marinos? In a Greek city the size of Athens, there's got to be thousands (or at least a thousand), Granted Dimitri is more of a Russian first name, but come on! There's a fairly good chance that there's more than one Dimitri Marinos floating around Athens! Which leads me to the point that I don't think that there was a date of birth column on the computer screen (I'm not sure about this part). So what would happen if you looked up Bob Smith from New York, New York (uh-oh)? Furthermore, how does J.R. even now that Dimitri was born in Athens?? He doesn't. Finally, how exactly would they be able to compile a worldwide blood database? This was several years before the internet. Maybe they just called up every country in the world and asked for a file ("Hello, Bangladesh? We really need that disk!"). That's about it [I guess you could call it a RANT]. You're right. Good call.

- Is that the same Dick Fenneman as earlier in the week? It seems to me that the one today was taller and wider than the earlier incarnation. Although, I may just be losing my mind...
He didn't seem like the same guy, did he? I thought so too but I thought I was just hallucinating. Thanks.

- I was skeptical of the Mark Graison bashing (all right, I guess it wasn't bashing, but nobody seems to like him). But after today's episode, I'm starting to see the light. Man, what a jerk. I'm sure he's jealous, but today he was bordering on being abusive (albeit verbally abusive).
I don't like Mark Graison at all. I remember when I first started the Dallas Poll earlier this year, about February. I could not believe that the favorite male guest star was Mark Graison by such an overwhelming margin. Punk Anderson was also winning for a while there. I don't understand at all. Today was a good example. I remember the first time I watched "Sleeping with the Enemy" with Julia Roberts playing an abused wife. When her husband hit her, I swear I wanted to punch him out right then and there. I feel the same way about Mark Graison.

- When J.R. sells the first two-thirds of the Marinos deal off, he asks for 15% royalties. But then, when he's talking to Jordan Lee, he doesn't mention the 15% royalty. However, he tells Sly to draw up the exact same contract. What's up with that?
Did he leave that out? I was too busy laughing like a loon to notice. I love it when JR does this to the cartel.

AHN Jake's corner:

- When Angelica and Grace leave J.R.'s office after telling him the "truth", they wait for the elevator in the reception room.  But, there is no receptionist - again!  I guess if she had been there, Angelica and Grace wouldn't have been able to have their dramatic little talk. Agreed. Where the hell is Kendall?

- I know the only reason J.R. had lunch with Miss Stone was to offer her one-third of his deal with Marinos Shipping, but she seemed to think otherwise. I find it hard to understand why Miss Stone would want to get romantically involved with J.R., let alone conduct business with him, after he used her to set-up Cliff (1982-1983 season).   Sometimes she loves him, sometimes she hates him.  Make up your mind.
She changes her mind about him more often than Sue Ellen. This was really funny, though.

- J.R. buys Mandy a fur coat, yet she is surprised -- why?  Hasn't he bought her things from the beginning?  He makes a big deal out of how he bought it with the money he received from Pam buying him out for the emerald deal.  I know he told her this so she'd tell Cliff, but he never talked much business with her before, so wouldn't she be a little suspicious?  Plus, J.R. Ewing has tons of money -- he could have bought her the coat even if Pam didn't buy him out.   I guess he figures after being with Mandy for so long, she's bound to become stupid -- more each day. JR does talk about business quite a bit around Mandy - more now than he did before, but that's okay. And Mandy is on a downward spiral in the intelligence department. Without giving away too much, it won't be long before she's jobbing to Sue Ellen - and liking it!

- Also, when Mandy and J.R. are snuggling on her bed, he tells her that they'll going out to a fancy restaurant.  Remember, J.R., you must be discreet.  Sometimes he takes her to quiet, out of the way places, sometimes he flaunts her.  It's like some days he remembers Sue Ellen's rules, and sometimes he forgets. Yes. This is a good point.

- When Mark and Pam are in bed, she starts to tell him about her trip to Columbia.   He tells her he's getting out of bed to put some clothes on; he doesn't want to argue when he's naked.  Yet he only puts his robe back on -- no pants.  A few minutes later, he storms out the door.  Either he wasn't naked or anyone who sees him is going to be in for a big surprise.  This was his house (or hotel room), so what is he going to do, rent another room? LOL! Excellent call.

- He better rent another room, because if I were Pam, I wouldn't let him back in.   When Mark first appeared on the show, I didn't like him (because he was a major factor in the collapse of Pam and Bobby's marriage), but now I hate him. A few months ago, he went out of his way to come back at just the right moment for Pam.  Now he treats her like crap.  For some reason he doesn't like the deal Pam is making (not that he knows anything about J.R. and Matt) and hates the fact that she still loves Bobby.   The way he screamed at her tonight, I just wished he would drop dead of his disease.  And for a man who still has a disease, he's doing a lot of yelling -- seems in better shape and condition than when he was well.
As I said to AHN Kyle, I cannot for the life of me understand what people like about Mark. I was shocked out of my skull when Mark started topping the Dallas poll as the favorite male guest star. I just want to smack the bastard, the way Bobby did at the Oil Baron's Ball. And if I were Pam, I'd weld my knees shut until I woke up.

- I know Charlie Wade is a nice girl and wants to see her Mom happy, but I've never seen anyone so persistent to set her mother up with men.  I know she loved Bobby like a daughter loves her father, but I still think she had a bit of a crush on both him and Jack. You're probably right. The big Ramboski is a very likable guy and a fifteen-year old girl like Charlie would have pictures of guys like him in her locker.

AHN Jason's corner:

- I won't get into the blood antigen thing too much b/c it was obviously just a plot device--  Just a note...JR's blood type has changed from episode 103 when Bobby and Pam found out about Kristen's first baby..  He was B back then and now he is O. Someone needs to do some research when writing for this show...
Was it B? Thank you so much for reminding me. Back in Episode 55, they said it was a difficult cross-match like Jamie and I remember thinking that it was strange because of what I remembered about this episode.

-One bit of advice for Jack when he was driving Grace home...  Don't let her touch your car!!!!!!

- Mighty convenient that Sue Ellen gives JR a tour which concludes with that ultra modern computer...(snicker snicker)    Also it is so convenient that JR is left alone to access confidential medical records off of that thing. And would Graison Industries really have records on people in Greece?  Kind of far fetched.

AHN Anne's corner:

- The only unusual thing I noticed in Thursday's episode was that the doctor who handled Jamie's case could lend J.R. a book about blood types so quickly. First, as if he'd know where to find a book like that right away and secondly, can a hospital lend out a book to a normal person? It's not a library, for Heaven's sake!
And he's a hematologist I would imagine, so he should have plenty of books around on the subject. When I worked in a doctor's office, I could borrow books any time I wanted from the private library. And it is JR Ewing we're talking about here.

AHN NIS's corner:

- Does Jenna get get $25,000 for helping find Jack? JR rambles on to the media about finding the person.
He had to make something up. Personally I think he doesn't want to give Jenna the money because she'll just dump it into her failing boutique.

- HEY: Mandy puts on her seat belt! Yes she does. The third time on the show -- ever!

AHN Joe S's corner:

- This is really reaching far back into the deep recesses of my mind's memory banks, but it seems that the outer office of the Graison Research Center looks awfully like the place where Clint Ogden worked several seasons back.  The set-up seems almost exactly the same!  I remember that he [Clint Ogden] had some job involving advanced technology and he took Sue Ellen to his workplace once. Interesting. You always make me scramble for my old tapes.

- Not really a nitpick, but it really aggravated me when J.R. told Sly exactly what he did involving the Cartel and the Marinos deal.  We just saw, in consecutive scenes, J.R. selling a third of his share of the Marinos shipping deal to the three major Cartel members (Marilee Stone,Andy Bradley, and Jordan Lee), and now we have to see J.R. explaining it in detail, as if we couldn't figure it out on our own?  Just how stupid did CBS think Dallas fans were?  I can understand cabbageing when related incidences are several episodes and weeks apart, but this same-episode cabbageing is highly insulting to my intelligence.  This scene with Sly really spoiled the moment. Agreed.

-  By the way, aren't there any other Cartel members aside from Jordan, Andy, Marilee, and Cliff (who took Wade Luce's place some years ago)?  I remember that Holly Harwood was in the Cartel (even though her father apparently wasn't when he was alive), and then she disappeared, taking her oil company and place in the Cartel with her.   I also seem to remember Punk Anderson being involved with the Cartel, as well as many nameless faces in a Cartel meeting back in the fifth season.  What happened to these people?
I don't recall for sure whether Holly or Punk were IN the cartel, although they may have done business with them. As an independent investor, Punk certainly did. There were others but I think only these three have stood the test of time and stupidity.


Episode 209: Blame it on Bogota

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 8 [signifying a huge Ramboski push to come soon!]

Bonehead dialogue of the day:

JR [surprisingly] - "If you can't believe what you hear, what are you going to believe?" HUH?

- Slim pickings for this episode. One thing I did find was that Jenna's lock seems to changed again. The last time we saw her lock it, at was at chest level. Now, suddenly she has to reach up to get to it. What's up with that?

AHN Jake's corner:

- The emeralds J.R. took out of the bag to show Matt looked pretty fake to me. J.R. may be trying to screw both Matt and Pam, but Matt has seen emeralds before.   And these aren't emeralds.
Maybe they're uncut emeralds. Even so, they do look small - unlike the big chunk Matt first showed her. And of course, they ARE fake.

- I noticed that the wall in the hallway outside Mandy's apartment was painted red. I remember it being painted blue a couple of episodes back. Really? Good call.

- When Jamie awoke in the hospital, her nails looked like they had just been done. Don't tell me Sue Ellen has been painting Jamie's nails while she was in the coma. Excellent call. Thank you. Maybe Sue Ellen thought it was the end of a season.

- I know that J.R. fed Mandy the phony information about Pam's emerald's deal so Cliff would invest, but isn't that getting a little old?  I never thought I'd tire of J.R. setting up Cliff, but if he keeps doing it in the same ways, I might.  Sure, Cliff's stupid enough to fall for them again and again, but I'm not stupid enough to know the writers were having a little trouble coming up with fresh ideas.
Well, he's setting up both Pam and Cliff. And is this really the same way as the other times? It's iffy.

- I know Jenna's going through a great deal of emotional difficulty, but if she keeps on closing her shop early, it's going to go out of business. Amazingly, now matter how mad or sad Jenna is, she still looks absolutely stunning.  That goes double for Pam.
Next season this becomes comical. If I remember correctly, we NEVER see Jenna working again after Pam wakes up. I remember commenting in Season 10 about Jenna never doing anything at all. I swear I had forgotten she ever had the boutique.

- When J.R. goes to the ranch to see his mother, he tells her he was doing work at the office and when he saw her and Bobby's picture, he decided to pay her a visit.  That would mean it was a weekday.  Yet there are Charlie and John Ross washing a horse.   Those two have been making a regular habit of playing hooky.
Yup. And it looks like Christopher's gotten their bad habit too.

- J.R. asks his mother if she wants anything -- and she responds with something like like "An early Christmas present?"  Since this episode was aired January 24, 1986 -- a month after Christmas -- wouldn't that be "a late Christmas present"?   Someone's losing track of time.  Maybe this episode was filmed before Christmas.
Perhaps. I thought this was an odd comment too.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- I think J.R.'s legal claim against Pam would pretty much be crap. If we're to believe that he's serious about taking her to court (for her incompetence in terms of business deals), than J.R. doesn't know too much about the legal system. Apparently J.R. believes that if Pam screws up the emerald situation, than he can get her thrown out of her position at Ewing Oil. But it doesn't work that way. Pam would pretty much have to be found to be insane (in the legal sense) to lose her role at Ewing Oil. Than again, this is the same crazy legal system which allowed (recovered) drunk Sue Ellen full custody of her child, so anything's possible! [My guess is that this is a moot point seeing as there's only about 3 weeks left in the dream season...]
It is a moot point. JR's plan strikes me as being somewhat far-fetched, though. You're right. Unless he plans on using Pam's guilt for wasting a fortune against her. That would be consistent with his style.

- Did anybody find John Ross saying that Sue Ellen's Walkman plan was her way of "filling my head with ideas" strange? I sure did. It's mind control, I tell you!

AHN Matt's corner:

- When Jack and Grace were walking, she asked about Jamie, and Jack said she was getting better.  I guess in his world a coma is still better.  Idiot. I noticed this too when Jamie woke up.

- Pam skipped a date with Mark and Sue Ellen to pack?  Number one, doesn't she have maids?  And number two, you would think that she would be able to keep a date especially after all the lecturing she gave Bobby when they were married.
Good call, my friend.

- When JR tucked in John Ross and leaves the room, it is still bright in there, like there were lights on. 

- When Franklin Horner told JR about the talk with Miss Ellie, he said it was unethical. Isn't it also illegal?  If he had questions wouldn't he call the brokerage firm, or Ellie's lawyer?  JR is not her keeper. I also don't understand how the checks can come from JR's account.
Because he's JR FREAKIN Ewing, that's why. I'm sure you're right that it is both unethical and illegal.

-What was that yutz Cliff Barnes watching on TV?  A gladiator porn movie? He is the stupidest character on the show. I usually don't mind the cabbageing on the show, because if people miss an episode or two, they can get caught up, but sometimes it goes way overboard- like today's conversation between Cliff and Jamie.
Actually I kind of liked that scene...it was the only nice one I can remember with Cliff and Jamie. It seemed heartfelt and well done. But what WAS up with that movie?

- I LOVED Ellie's riding outfit when she was with Jon Ross, Christopher, and Charlie. Where does this woman shop? Miss Ellie's Sack Dress Shack. Has to be.

AHN Jason's corner:

- JR tucks John Ross in and proceeds to leave without shutting off the light. I don't know about you, but when my parents used to tuck me in, they always shut off the light.... Yep. Pointed out.

- This is a continuity error.  When Grace and Jack are walking and talking about her career at Marinos, they pause (by a tree I think) and you see Jack's Left hand towards the top of the canister he is holding.  When they switch cameras to face Grace, you see his right hand on top.  Obviously Jack moves his hands between takes, even though there isn't suppose to be a pause in the scene. I'll check this.

- Barnes Wentworth seems to have changed offices.. or at least the reception area and Jackie's 'work' station seems to be a different angle than previous episodes...  (Did you catch her blank looks today when Cliff started blabbing out orders to her.  I laughed quite a bit..)
Jackie is such a moron. It does look different but maybe they redecorated after Pam left.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- There is an abrupt continuity cut in the first scene with Sue Ellen and Jerry.  We hear Mark knock on the door, and then we hear the door clicking open.  Immediately after we hear the door just starting to open, the camera cuts to a shot of Mark walking through a WIDE OPEN door.  There isn't even any evidence of the door moving into that position.  It's as if the door had been wide open all along. I'll check this.

- When Cliff enters the Barnes-Wentworth offices, we see the door close behind him, and the glass door is a single door which reads Barnes-Wentworth Oil, with each word underneath the other.  In every episode before this, the door leading to the Barnes-Wentworth offices was a set of double-doors which read as follows: "Barnes-Wentworth Oil Company."

- You'll notice that when Pam and Matt arrive at their hotel in Colombia, they only have one suitcase each.  You'd think for such a major, physically trying excursion as this, they'd have brought a bit more stuff with them.
I guess Matt advised her to travel light.


Episode 210: Shadow Games

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 0 [Yikes! What happened?]

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Kyle]

PAM: "Feels like we've been climbing for hours!"

No kidding! Maybe its because you HAVE BEEN CLIMBING FOR HOURS!

- Not that I'm the least bit interested in the goings-on in South America yet, but why is Matt Cantrell speaking Spanish to the guy at the post office, who obviously speaks fairly good English? Same thing with the guy at the hotel. This is silly.

- What's with the little bench by Bobby's grave? That's cheesy. Did Ellie ask for it to be put in because she read the script and realized that Jenna would need it for her frequent visits?

- Speaking of Jenna: while she has her session, her breath is visible and most of the people around the ranch are wearing jackets. Why aren't the kids from Woodgrove wearing any coats? This makes very little sense.

- Not a nit, just an observation: did anyone else expect Jenna's soliloquy to Bobby to become a full-blown conversation? I half expected her to say, "What's that, Bobby?", like they do with stuffed animals on kids' shows.

- For those who don't know, part of this emerald mine storyline was crafted to give Victoria Principal some time off from the show. I don't mind that at all. What I do mind is that her double, who was seen momentarily in this episode, is pathetic. She has black hair, she looks rather fat...come on! Who casted this part, Deborah Shelton? [Sorry, Kyle...that was uncalled for. I apologize.]

AHN Kyle's corner:

- What's the deal with Victoria P. today? Correct me if I'm wrong, but Pam never actually appears on the show. We hear her voice and see her back, but we never see her. Does anybody know why this occurred, in early February of 1986?
It wasn't her. It was a stand-in. She needed some time off for some reason...I don't remember for sure.

- When Jenna visits Bobby's grave, I believe its the first time anyone's visited it the entire season. What's up with that? I know that everyone really misses him, but they really should come visit his grave more. It is on freakin' Southfork!
It's the first time they've shown it. Jenna mentioned something about visiting it in the previous episode. It would be gloomy/creepy if it was visited on a regular basis.

- Jenna today: "I want to go back" [in time]. Jenna last week: "Things are never going to be the same again". Pam: "Tell me I'm not dreaming". In retrospect, it appears as though the Dallas writers (never known for their subtlety) have been dropping hints as to what is to occur at the end of the season. (Although this really doesn't jive with what I've heard, mainly that they weren't sure how they were going to bring Bobby back and that Patrick Duffy's wife came up with the idea right near the end of the season). Yes, be assured that it was a last-minute decision, because Patrick Duffy's decision to return to the show was last-minute as well.

- Remember way back (think Season 1 and 2) when Pam was likened to Cartman's sentiments about Kyle's mom? Well there's a new Kyle's mom in town... and it's Jenna. Absolutely. Too bad you can't substitute 'Charlie' for Kyle or you lose the rhythm. All you need is Mr. Hankey and a "HOWWWWDY HO!" and you're all set.

AHN Jake's corner:

- I know it's been a few weeks since she signed up to work with the down syndrome kids, but Donna's just a little too good at sign language. Well, she's a quick learner. She started doing it while she was pregnant, right?

- When we first saw Matt and Pam climbing the mountain (Pam was asking when they would take a break) their voices seemed a little too close -- like they were talking right into the camera.  Yet there they were, about 10 feet away, walking their horses up the mountain.  The second time we saw Matt and Pam, I heard Matt talking, but his lips clearly weren't moving. .

- The nurse taking care of Jamie at her and Cliff's apartment offers to make them popcorn.   I assume she's never been there before, yet she doesn't ask where anything is -- not the popcorn, not the pans, nothing.  Seems like a weird thing for a nurse to do, anyway.  And Cliff renting 'Bambi' for Jamie...how corny was that? Very odd. And very corny.

- When a very angry J.R. informs Clayton that Miss Ellie has been buying his companies, Clayton says he's going to find her right away.  Yet he goes to Houston first. Oops! Actually, I think he says he's going to find OUT right away. I'll double check this, though.

- Why did Ellie cry when Donna told her the baby she used to be pregnant with had down syndrome?  Ellie didn't cry when Donna was hurt or when the baby died, yet she cries about 6 weeks after the baby dies after finding out it had a disorder.  Weird... I thought this was strange too, but I usually don't find fault with BBG's acting. Maybe there was a cut and we missed during this conversation.

- I find it odd that they choose to have the benefit and auction for the blood research center at the Oil Baron's Club.  I guess the producers of 'Dallas' thought it would be for the better -- budget-wise.
Yes, I absolutely agree. It only makes sense if your primary target was the oil community...but why would that be? Wouldn't you want to invite doctors, lawyers, other rich people? This is silly.

- J.R. seemed to be dancing oddly.  J.R. was never one to dance that much, and everyone else who was dancing was dancing slowly and calmly, yet J.R. sways like a swing in the wind.  Guess he's really happy!
Well, he's probably got his hands all over Linda Gray. That would make me very happy.

- Miss Ellie and Clayton seemed to resolve their problem a little too quickly.  He swooped her into the bathroom and was steaming, and a few minutes later, it's all done, and he says "I'm not furious at you.  I'm mad at myself".  Sure didn't seem like that to me.
This whole thing was stupid. At least now we can forget about the mandatory Ellie/Clayton existence justification storyline for the season.

- When Clayton came to the table with Ellie after their little chat in the ladies' bathroom, no one seems to notice Clayton -- not even Ray -- for about two minutes.   Guess they were so interested in Sue Ellen's pitiful and unconvincing speech.
Hey, you're right! Good call.

AHN Jason's corner:

-What is this 3 day rule with Ewing Oil?  So much for taking a honeymoon or any serious vacation.....
Yes. This is certainly not the first time someone's gone away for more than 3 days. I don't have a problem with the rule, just the fact that this is the first time it's been put into effect.

- Did you notice that when Jack introduces Grace and Jenna, he just uses first names..   Usually when you introduce your friends to strangers, you'd give a full name..   (Even though Grace's has not been given to us)  But if she has dated Jack, you would think he would know it...
Maybe he doesn't. Remember what she said about Marinos' glasnost policy. But he should at least introduce Jenna by her full name.

- Bobby's tombstone..  Says Bobby James Ewing..  I would have thought that they would have said something like Robert "Bobby" James Ewing..  I mean what will Ms. Ellie's say?   Ms. Ellie Ewing Farlow  (Maybe drop the Farlow if JR is in charge of the burial....) LOL! I know, but everybody since his birth apparently has called Bobby 'Bobby'. Except once in the first season when that jabronie Kent Jackson called Southfork and asked for Robert, but never else.

- Did anyone notice that Ray has the kid ride a pony (horse?) without a bridle? The kid was pulling on the horses mane to keep steady....Didn't notice. Thanks.

- Jamie's conversation with Cliff kind of bugged me...  It went like this..
    - "Cliff, you're not going? "
    - "I bought a table but want to stay here with you, poopsie" (OK I added this comment)
    - "But you must go,  It is the least we can do for Mark's clinic"

Now if he bought a table full of $1000.00 plate dinners, I would say he did his share for the clinic....
Yeah, I would think so. But I think Jamie might be thinking that Cliff is just trying to avoid going to the auction so that he won't have to bid on anything, since we all know he's a cheapskate and doesn't want to get stuck with the bill for anything. If he had an excuse not to go, no one could accused him of this.

- Also if you do view this scene again, pay attention to what Jamie says..something about how she knew the dinner  was that night that kind of confused me....I would be interested in your input.
Yeah, this seems kind of odd given that she just woke up from a coma. Probably Sue Ellen mentioned it in all the talk about the blood transfusion and the trouble with finding a donor. That's my guess.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- I see Jenna has the same annoying habit as Pam of smiling when she cries.  It must be all the plastic surgery affecting her facial
expressions.  Next thing you know, Jenna will be talking through her chin during phone conversations.

- Why does Floyd Erickson call J.R. at home on Southfork?  Since Floyd is directly involved in Miss Ellie's deals, wouldn't J.R.'s detective work be revealed if Miss Ellie picked up the phone and Floyd said he wanted to speak to J.R.?
Yes, you are right. Mike also pointed out that Ericson could have called JR at the office instead of flying up from Houston.

-  Something that's bothered me for a long time, but really hit home tonight with Mark directly in the public spotlight at his charity auction:  Shouldn't Mark be having a number of legal troubles and problems with the insurance companies since coming back from the dead? The man faked his own death, after all.  Not only should the life insurance companies that had a policy with him be pissed off right now, but the IRS should be chasing Mark for their share of cash, too.  Gee, I guess a world without insurance companies and the IRS would really have to be a dream.
Well, remember when Mark's lawyer told Pam that he wanted his estate left the way it was for 2 years after his death? I figure Mark had some kind of plan. I bet the insurance was never pursued and taxes were paid.

- Why is Jordan Lee sitting at the same table as Mark and Jerry at the charity auction?   Wouldn't it be more typical of him to sit with Andy Bradley or Cliff? Yes it would. Good call.

AHN Mike's corner:

- My wife informs me that she read in a one of the Dallas coffee table books that Pam's absence in the last episode was due to a back injury that prevented her from filming for a while.
Thanks. I remember it was something like that.

-On a completely different note, one of my pet peeves about Dallas (in the vein of people ordering a drink or food and then leaving before it comes) is how people get on a plane at the drop of a hat and travel to have 30 second in-person conversations that they could have easily had on the phone. Last night's episode had Miss Ellie's broker fly up from Houston to meet with JR for about a minute to have a nothing conversation. And did Nicholas have to fly all the way from Greece to tell Angelica Dimitri died? Don't they have phones in Greece?
Good call. I agree about the broker - Nicholas's news may have been more pressing, given Angelica's master plan. But it's a good point.

- Re Miss Ellie's dresses, my wife is convinced that the wardrobe people have one sack dress pattern and they simply use the same pattern every time but with different colors. She claims Miss Ellie had basically the same dress on three times last night but in three different colors. They may vary the collars and sleeves a little, but that's about it.
I think your wife is an astute judge of fashion.

-Watch Kenderson and Sue Ellen on stage with the microphone and notice the geeky guy on guitar in the background basking in his 15 minutes of fame. At one point, he's really hamming it up. The director must have noticed because in the last sequence, while you can see other band members where the guitar player was, he ain't there anymore.
Really? I'll check! Thanks!

AHN Matt's corner:

- Ray, Clayton, and "Eddie" are all hanging around the children with Downs Syndrome.  Now it is nice and great that they are there, but don't they have work to do?  Clayton is a big ox, but he usually helps out, and doesn't Ray have to feed some cows or anything?  And can "Eddie" the ranch-hand give up his time to watch a few children feed horses?  Southfork is supposed to be a big sprawling ranch, but why are there so many people just loafing around?
I agree with you - but how is this different than any other episode? :)

- Someone made a comment about all the help Miss Ellie did. Yeah, all she did was hug a couple of kids and say it was OK to pet the horses.  Big help Ellie.
She gave her permission to let the kids come over. Doesn't take much to get Donna happy anymore.

- And Jenna is riding a horse in the middle of the day.  Isn't she supposed to be running a boutique?  Bobby must have been a bad business man, because he bought two businesses and trusted two people to run them, and they just ignore it.  Pam's aerobic studio, and Jenna's Boutique.  And he lent all that money to that idiot Cantrell. Yeah, Bobby was a genius.
Agreed. Totally agreed. When it comes to business, he's no JR.

- Why would a cheapskate like Cliff Barnes buy a plate (an expensive one) at a charity auction, and then not plan on going?
Hmm. Maybe he really does love Jamie a whole lot. I don't know. I suspect it's to avoid the auction so he won't have to bid on anything - cheapskate.

- Why are Donna and Ray hanging around Southfork?  Is their water pipe still broken? Oh, yeah! I forgot about that!

- Looking at what the women (Sue Ellen, Donna) wore to the charity auction, I just had to notice one thing.  They bought these disgusting dresses at Jenna's.  No wonder she never works there, a dump like that just sells those ugly clothes. No wonder she doesn't need to work. Well, we don't know for sure whether they got them from Jenna, but it's a strong possibility. Then again, her boutique has been closed for a while, right?

- When Matt was in the jungle, he showered, and just put clothes on.  Don't most people dry off?
Matt Cantrell is NOT most people. He's weird.


Episode 211: Missing

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 0

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN NIS]

Ray: [coming down the stairs and finding Clayton restraining Jenna]: "What's wrong?"

She's freaking loony, Ray. That's what's wrong! AHN Jason nominated the whole scene as pathetic and I heartily agree.

- I wonder why, at the beginning of this episode, Matt doesn't cry out for the men in the group, who are also obviously missing? Wouldn't that increase the likelihood of finding someone and figuring out what happened? Or is he only worried about Pam because she has more interesting body parts?

- As was pointed out yesterday, the doors at the Barnes-Wentworth executive offices have been redone. At least they remain true to form. Instead of saying 'Barnes-Wentworth Oil Company" across both doors, both doors now just read 'Barnes Wentworth Oil".

- Aside from being a cheapskate, Cliff has a very short memory. He tells Jamie that until he married her, Pam was the only family he had. What about his mother Rebecca? What about his father Digger? What about his half-sister Kath...oh, wait, forget about Katherine. But what about his mom and dad? Don't they count?

- There were comments yesterday about the fact that Pam and Mark only brought one suitcase each to Los Gatos. I was almost ready to dismiss it until JR showed up with two suitcases for the one or two-day trip.

- Grace either did her homework or is psychic. Despite the fact that Jack introduced his ex-flame Jenna only by her first name yesterday, Grace refers to her as 'Jenna Wade'.

Deranged Clint asked: Why does Jamie act like a sexy porn star when she's talking with Cliff, but acts like a woman who escaped death when she talks to Sue Ellen. She acts like she's Cliff's love slave or something while Cliff's around.
Well, she has no other gimmick

Deranged Clint also asked: Would you say Patrick Duffy resembled Elvis Presley? I only say that because Cilla seems to be overacting making people think she really cared about Elvis. That money grubber wouldn't even remarry because of "the name", "the man" Strange how life imitates art, huh?

A new AOL submitter asked: Hello--I've been enjoying your page for a couple of weeks now, especially the daily nits!  This is not so much a nit as an observation about Miss Ellie's scene with Christopher.  She says her recipe for chicken soup was one of Bobby's favorites, which led me to wonder if she got the recipe from Campbell's, BECAUSE....in the mid-eighties, BBG did commercials for what was then a new line of soup for Campbell's called Home Cookin--I swear she was wearing those glasses on a chain around her neck just like in Episode 211 (my memory may be failing me on that part) but she was definitely hawking, you guessed it, chicken soup!   In fact, the commercial ended with BBG copying the ingredients off the can label--so she could make some for Christopher? Maybe she read the script!  I thought this was just a bizarre "coincidence'" and wondered if anyone else noticed!
I certainly did not. Thanks for the kind words - this is kind of stuff that gets posted!

AHN Bill commented about the fight between Matt and Mark.  These are two big and built guys.  They have this big fist fight.. several punches landed, falling off tables, etc.  And of course, at the end.. not the tiniest bit of blood.. no redness.. the next day, we see them with no bruises.   When big men like this hit each other this many times, they tend to hurt each other.  I didn't see this mentioned and it really stuck out to me. You are right about this...except in the WWF, I suppose. Good point.

AHN NIS's corner:

- When Matt calls the research center, there is no line light on the phone even though Sue Ellen says to Mark that Matt is on line 2. I didn't notice. Thanks.

- Grace appears to be wearing a bra or something when she is getting cozy with Jack for apparently the second time. I would think she would be just wearing just the shirt after the first time.
I suppose you're right. Grace doesn't strike me as being the shy type.

- After the kid delivers the 'ransom' note to Matt, I would think they would want to question the kid about who gave him the note before he gets away.
I don't believe we ever see the kid again, but I could be wrong. He probably wouldn't know, but you are right.

AHN Joe O's corner:

- Basically I take issue with the fight scene in today's episode.  I did find it amusing but was surprised to see the police take no immediate action to break it up.   Aren't the police responsible for "restoring order?"
Well, yes. It is Colombia, but you're right. This is a BILC [because it looks cool]. And did you see that Lou Thesz press by Matt? Stone Cold Steve Austin would be proud!

- The second thing I found peculiar about this scene is how the officer shoots his gun yet no one in the background even flinches.  I would think that would at least startle a person just a tad.
Hmm. Yes, I suppose you're right. The locals might be used to it, but Cliff shouldn't be.

- Finally, who the hell does Angelica Nero think she is?  Why does J.R. have to report to her?
JR doesn't have to report to her but she seems to be a control freak.

- I found the conversation between Ms. Ellie and Christopher to be a little odd.   What did Ms. Ellie mean when she said "if your mother has to stay longer than she expected."  Does  Ellie know something no one else knows.   Supposedly Pam's disappearance in Colombia is only known between Mark, J.R., Cliff, and Jamie.  So what is Miss Ellie referring to here.
Well, Sue Ellen knows because she was there when Mark got the call. This is probably how Ellie found out. Or maybe not - maybe she's just being ominous.

AHN Jason's corner:

- This one was from both yesterday and today.  Matt was swimming right before Pam (Or her stunt voice) was kidnapped.  He was shown nice and wet but when he runs through the "jungle" (I will get to this next)   and arrives at their tents he is dry. Then today he walks around in a mosquito infected, supposed to be steamy jungle, at night no less,  with no shirt and a vest only worn on one arm, the rest just dangling..   I admit he has a great body, but this is overkill.......
Correct on both counts.

- I just don't buy this jungle.. Yesterday Matt and VP's Body Double were walking through a very unexotic jungle that looked like a hiking trail I saw in New Hampshire!  I am no geography expert but it looks like a lot or a part of the Southfork riding trails, not a humid jungle near the equator.....
Three for three so far.

- Also, why is it that JR, Mark, and Cliff wear heavy business suits to the jungle and don't even break a sweat...  Why not wear shorts and boots?
Well, they're not in the jungle...they're at the hotel. But I see your point.

- Speaking of mismatched jungle attire...  Is a trip in the jungle the best place to wear an extremely valuable brooch?  Pam's body double seem to think so..  tsk tsk..
The hotel probably didn't have a safe...or maybe it does but it doubles as Chief Rueda's private stash.

- When a boss (Pam) is away from an office where she knows her partner doesn't exactly level with her, is it a smart policy to send your personal secretary off on a vacation?   You'd think she'd want Phyllis to keep tabs on JR while she is away....
I see your point, but from a real-world perspective, what the heck could Phyllis do?

- I liked it when Mark says Pam may have run away...  Sure I'd set fire to tents to run off into a jungle I have never been in before just to get away from a guy I begged to drag me off to this bug infested place..  Happens every day...., right guys?
(You know for an episode that she wasn't seen in,  Pam sure got a lot of nits today!!!)
I didn't think about it this way. Okay.

- Is it a good idea to fire a pistol in an enclosed public place like a hotel? Granted, it sounded like a cap gun but in real life, that bullet could have ricocheted (sp?) and seriously injured someone...(I know.  It was done -Because It Is Cool)
Yes. And so was the fight, although Matt really impressed me with that Lou Thesz press.

- JR has a few nits today too.  First, he takes a briefcase into a meeting and has the money he needs in his jacket pocket..  Why bring the briefcase? Good call!

- Secondly, the trigger happy multi-lingual police guy leaves the first envelope of $$ JR gives him on his desk and pockets the second one..  Why not pocket both?  Money is still money.... Yes, you're right! I was going to make a note of this but I was busy typing in the summary and it slipped my mind.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- Near the end of the benefit Sue Ellen says she's just waiting on the accountants to finish tabulating how much money was raised. In today's episode, back at Southfork, she mentions that it will be at least a couple of days before they can figure out how much money was brought in. The only thing that happens between Sue Ellen's two statements being Angelica donating a cool mil, one has to wonder just how incompetent these accountants are.
Okay. Good call.

- The whole concept of the benefit confuses me. At first I thought it was just a way to get some good P.R, but today Jerry Kenderson seems all excited about being able to purchase some much needed equipment. But how much money was raised? 2 million? 3 million dollars? If the clinic really did need money why wouldn't Mark (who's richer than God) just give them the cash?? I totally agree. They can afford the APEX 2000 with its 5 Gigabyte hard drive, but they have to go begging for pocket money? The whole thing is far-fetched, and I said so before.

- Does Barnes-Wentworth have automatic doors going into the office? It seems so. This seems to be an incredibly tacky idea (very Kmart-ish). Hard to tell, but I think so.

- The Pam that Cliff speaks of sure doesn't sound like the Pam Cliff new just a few short months ago (when he told her that she abandoned him etc., etc.). Apparently all it takes to warm Cliff's heart is a near death experience (i.e. Jamie's accident, Pam's disappearance). He's such a sweet guy... Yes, you're right.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- Is the soft radio music that Matt turns on when J.R. comes by really enough to deter any bugs that may be in his room.  Usually, people following this tactic turn every noisy electrical appliance on to nearly full blast, but some soft cantina music isn't going to cut it. I thought so too, but I wasn't sure. Okay.

- When Jenna goes loony when prevented from visiting Bobby's grave, Miss Ellie offers Jenna to sit down and have some coffee.  Coffee for Jenna???  Gee, I hope it's decaf for the Ewings' sake.
Good call! At least they were smart enough to make the call for sedatives.

- Where the Hell have Phyllis and Kendall been for the past several episodes.  We haven't seen them!  Shouldn't Phyllis especially be quite busy answering phone calls and such since Pam is out of the country?
Well, Pam says she gave Phyllis time off, which is silly. I don't know where Kendall has disappeared to, though. Awfully convenient so that Angelica can creep in whenever she wants.

- Doesn't it seem to quick for Angelica to be standing comfortably at J.R.'s door so soon after he arrives.  He's only been in the offices for a few seconds, and we know Angelica hadn't come up while he was in the reception area, because we didn't hear the other elevator door open. Was Angelica hiding in Pam's office all this time?  Or maybe the Phantom let her in!
I blame the Phantom personally. Maybe Angelica is the Phantom!

AHN Matt's corner:

- In a big company like Graison Research, is it accurate to have Sue Ellen Ewing tallying up the money on a little calculator?  How about on a computer, where you can list who gave the money, and what they bought.  It may be more accurate than Miss Texas doing the job. Agreed. Why don't they use the awesome power of the APEX 2000? Or is 20 Megabytes of RAM insufficient for this?

- There are always accent inconsistencies with grace and Angelica, and it is starting to piss me off.  Grace said "North Shore" in a European accent, and Drillers in an American one.  All in the same sentence!!! UGGGHHHH!!!!
Yes. This gets worse as the storyline goes on. Thankfully not much longer.

- Miss Ellie was all for putting Sue Ellen in a sanitarium just because she was a drunk, and Jenna has been a raving lunatic for weeks, and all that she gets is a hug from Clayton.

- When Miss Ellie talked to Christopher, she said that maybe Pam and he can move in. Isn't Pam going to marry Mark?  Wouldn't it be WEIRD if Pam and Mark moved into Southfork, her dead ex-husband's house.  Wouldn't it be strange for Pam and Mark to live with Jenna and JR, and such. Makes no sense. She doesn't want to hurt Christopher's feelings, I guess.

AHN Jake's corner:

- After Matt wakes up after being unconscious, he walks over to the still-burning camp and finds his gun.  I find it hard to believe that they took his jewels, but not his gun.  If he had woken up soon than expected, he could have hunted them down with the gun. That small pouch he found...weren't those the jewels? You are right about this, though. I mean, no matter how it turns out, it would make more sense to make it look like a planned robbery.
CORRECTION:  Upon closer inspection, AHN Jason says that the bag looked empty.

- Does Jenna not know how Bobby died?  Jenna says that if she had married Bobby, he wouldn't have died.  That's right, he wouldn't have died, but Jenna would have been killed.  Katherine Wentworth would have made sure to kill Jenna if they ever were married.  And why does Jenna say she should have married him earlier?  She never postponed the marriage or anything.  It was Bobby who took a while to ask. At this point, Jenna does not know that Bobby was engaged to Pam. No one other than she and Mark know. I believe Jenna's going back to fifteen years ago when she walked out on Bobby the first time. Then he would have never met Pam...yada, yada, yada. And let's face it, she's completely nuts right now.

- Cliff says to Jamie that Pam is the strong one.  She is stronger than Cliff, but a while back, Cliff told Jamie or Mandy that Pam was emotionally unstable for a time...and very weak.
Really? I don't remember. Good call.

- What bedroom were Cliff and Jamie in when he was getting ready to leave? It is a different one than from the last episode, when Cliff rented her the movies.  I'm sure of it.
Maybe it's just a different angle. Hard to tell. You're probably right, though.

- When J.R. comes back from Los Gatos and goes to Ewing Oil, Sly tells him about Mandy stopping by.  Then he asks about Harve.  But she says nothing about Angelica calling.  Then a few seconds later Angelica walks in.  I guess the writers didn't want Sly to waste her breath telling J.R. about Angelica when she was going to walk in any moment anyway.
Good call. Sly read the script.


Episode 212: Dire Straits

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 2

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Jake]

When Jerry Kenderson drops Sue Ellen off at Southfork, she tells him how he made her laugh so much.  Then she thanks him.  For what, he asks.  For the good time and the laughs, says Sue Ellen.  My, this guy has a short attention span.

- Jerry and Sue Ellen are already starting to bother me. First of all, Jerry brings Sue Ellen home after dinner. Where's her car? Did she get a ride that morning, expecting to go out to dinner and be dropped off later?

- And Jerry seems to get a parking spot right up against the driveway. There don't seem to be any other cars. Shouldn't JR's car be there, in addition to Ray's, Donna's, and Jenna's?

- And I would be remiss if I didn't point out that it's a damn shame for a talented actress like Linda Gray to have to sell Jerry Kenderson's stupid attempts at humor.

- When JR is examining the press clippings about Dimitri Marinos, Sly knocks on the door and then enters without a response from JR. This is a not a good habit. What if JR was having a private conversation...or doing something else private?

- Pam's lone suitcase is full of surprises. Remember, she only brought one suitcase with her to South America. Along with a whole bunch of other necessities, she managed to pack a very enticing frilly nightie! Was this for Mark's benefit, because she knew he'd be down sooner or later?

- We've seen that the divine Ms. Nero is a woman of many talents. She's also perfected an anti-aging formula! When we see the newscast of her from 1977, she looks almost exactly the same! This was ten years ago!

AHN Jason's corner:

- Bobby's picture on the mantle while Jenna talks to the shrink.  I considered this was kind of convenient but let it pass b/c then I realized it could have been there all along this season.  Anyone notice it there before?
Didn't notice it before. I'm sure Joe will point out that John Rettino strikes again!

- Cliff and Mark are still were their shirts and pants from the office and this time they are IN THE JUNGLE. Couldn't they remember to pack something more practical?

- What was with that handmade sign on the news broadcast?  Don't they have something more professional to record the date?  Kind of cheesy... Yes, they certainly should...unless it's from a special archive or something. It did look cheesy.

AHN Jake's corner:

- At the beginning of the episode, when Cliff was re-reading the ransom note, the Chief was sitting at the bar.  At the end of the last episode, he was sitting at the table, when Matt was reading the ransom note for the first time.  Only a couple of seconds must have passed, yet there is the Chief at the bar.
It's possible that more than a few seconds of past. They talk about 'waiting' a lot...maybe it's been a few minutes. It's a good point, though.

- Donna says that when she was talking to Jenna about Bobby, Jenna said she needs time to get over it.  But a few episodes ago, she said she'll never get over him.
No disrespect at all, my friend, but I think you're the only one who's interested in this right now. [I'm kidding. You're right.]

- I noticed the picture of Bobby on the fireplace mantel than Jenna was looking at was the same one as Miss Ellie had in her room in the season premiere, "Family Ewing", and the one Pam had on her desk a few episodes into the season.
This picture will be ubiquitous from now on. In a few seasons, Ray will have a framed 8 x 10 glossy of this in his house.

- For the second episode in about a week (the last time was when Jenna was at Bobby's grave), Jenna manages to stop crying almost instantly.  One second she's bawling and tears streaming down her face, the next second she's under control and not a tear in her face. Must be the sedatives from last night kicking in.

- Also, the conversation J.R. had with Sue Ellen up in her room about Jerry Kenderson having eyes for her reminded me very much of the one they had over Peter Richards -- almost word for word. I believe you are absolutely correct.

- Also, Sue Ellen doesn't seem to be spending a lot of time with John Ross. She gave him up so he could live with both parents, but J.R. seems to be spending the majority of the time.  I guess the job at Graison Research is more important...
Hmm. Where does this sound familiar? Oh, yes...Pam's work at the store, Pam's aerobics, Donna's oil company, Lucy's modeling...

- When Matt comes back from dropping off the ransom money, he goes right to the bar and starts drinking out of someone else's beer bottle.  I found that weird, and disgusting. Matt qualifies on both counts.

- The phrase "Oh, I didn't hear you coming" is becoming quite popular. Jenna said that to Charlie when Charlie came to talk to her outside.  No, really, Jenna?   If you had heard Charlie, you would have said something!
Another candidate for Bonehead Dialogue.

AHN NIS's corner:

- Clayton knew Dr. Danvers phone number by heart. Not bad ox-man. He may have only dialed six numbers but I would have to look again. It was hard to tell because I believe the scene was cut abruptly.

- Hey it's Sgt. Joseph Getraer from CHiPs. Looks like he has a new job. Maybe Ponch drove him to it. Really? I didn't realize it was him.

- Not sure what Cliff was looking at with the binoculars. It looked like only jungle in front of him. Except when Pam magically reappears with newly dyed hair.

- JR calls Sue Ellen and tells her Pam is OK? Couldn't that tip his hand in the matter? After all, it wasn't Pam, Mark, or Cliff that called him. I don't recall the details here...I'll check.

- Mark doesn't have to be at his auction dinner? Maybe not except that it is his fund raiser. I would think he has a certain obligation. Good point.

- JR asks Sly to call Alex Garrett in New York. It's seems late but Alex may have an answering service. I assume he does.

- Mark says something like 'the kidnappers will ask for money'. Cliff replies 'What, are you some kind of expert!'. What the hell do you think they will want? To trade Pam for Jamie? or that crystal sculpture? I missed this completely.


Episode 213: Overture

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Jason]

- Donna-  "How can you go back [to the psychiatrist] if you never went in the first place?"
- Jenna-  "What do you mean?"
To be fair,  it looks like they are finally making some progress here....

- Mark must have jungle fever today. In order to convince Cliff to stick around and see the mine, he tries to make him think how great it would be to strike it rich. Two problems with this, Mark. First of all, Cliff is already rich! Second of all, Cliff knows all about the joys of striking it rich...remember Gold Canyon 340? It can't get much more thrilling than that, can it? I mean, Cliff was almost penniless and then hit at the last minute.

- I think Ellie probably doesn't give instructions very well. When she and Donna are trying to move the couch in the livingroom, they are unable to even budge it. It doesn't look that heavy, so I can only assume that Ellie pulled one way and Donna the other. Either that or it's bolted to the floor.

- Did you catch the classic plot trickery today? This time, the emerald group takes a helicopter to a point near the mine. Very convenient, Matt. Why didn't you guys take a copter the FIRST time? Perhaps that way Pam might not have gotten kid...oh, never mind.

- I think I know why Donna has had such a hard time getting pregnant. She has a very poor grasp of anatomy. Tony claims he has a stomachache, so Donna feels his head. I didn't hear anything that would suggest the possibility of fever.

- But Donna must have an iron grip with those fists of death! Did you see the way that she held Jenna back at the restaurant? Jenna wanted to leave but all it took for Donna to hold her back was to grab her wrist! I'm impressed.

- Sly tells JR that Alex Garrett is calling on Line 2. JR picks up the phone and immediately starts talking, despite not having pressed a line button.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- It seems sort of strange that Grace and Jack had this really intimate and romantic scene and then finished it of with a tender... hug? Yet another instance where the Ramboski gets shafted. What is wrong with these women? Shouldn't they be throwing themselves at him?

- It seems like the decision to address the Down's Syndrome children with sign language or spoken word is fairly arbitrary. Case in point: when Donna talks to the kid with the stomach ache, she signs and speaks. Then Ray comes up and just starts speaking. I'm sure that doing both (signing and speaking) is just to facilitate the child's understanding, but the kid didn't seem to have any problem with Ray just talking.
Yes, you're right. And speaking of the kid, he becomes more and more important in the next two weeks.

- Why would Pam think that Cliff was involved with the emerald mine for anything else than turning a profit? She genuinely seems taken aback. Why would Cliff care about pursuing Bobby's dreams? He hates the Ewings. Which leads to the question: how well does Pam actually know Cliff?
Not as well as she thought. Or maybe she's just blinded by her own feelings for Bobby so she can't see it until now.

- What the hell is Donna wearing near the end of the show (when Jenna comes home from her "appointment"). It looks like a blue dress with... a tie! Abso-freakin-lutely ridiculous!!
Terrible. Not even Angelica would be caught dead in something like this.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Why doesn't Ms. Ellie ask Raoul or Paco to help move the furniture...Isn't that what servants do?  Help around the house with manual labor? Especially since she and Donna can barely push it...
Good call. I forgot about them. Maybe this is Ellie's other passion, besides gardening.

- Matt calls JR from a lobby phone.  How? with a calling card?  Did they have them in 86? and would that kind of phone (in another country) accept it? Also he seems to be taking a big chance by talking about their plan with Mark (his enemy) walking right next to him.... I didn't notice. You're right! I wonder how many numbers he pressed...

The return of AHN Bill's corner:

- This isn't really a nit, but how ridiculous is it for Cliff to squabble about $12?   He sunk $2 million into this little scheme.. what is another $12 for laundry to a millionaire? This is just to illustrate what a cheapskate he is.

- And also, this has bothered me for a while.  I accept that maybe J.R. would know Harry McSween's home number by heart, but in general it is ridiculous how often when people call each other on Dallas, they just remember the phone number off the top of their head.  Of course, it's expected that J.R. would know the number for Southfork, for example, and I can't quote a real good specific (and the McSween is borderline, since he's been around at while even if it's his home #), but in general, this is something that always bothers me. Yes, sometimes it is egregious. But today's instance is excusable I think.


Episode 214: Sitting Ducks

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 6

- When Cliff and Jamie are getting cozy in his office, Jackie knocks on the door and walks right in. She sees them kissing and proceeds to go about her business! How did she know there wasn't MORE going on? Sheesh.

- As I indicated with the Line of the Day, Sue Ellen looks so scruffy today - that sweatshirt! And that hair! What is going on here? Is she deliberately trying to make herself look bad to keep the attention of Jerry Kenderson away?

- For all you folks who've been wondering - the Oil Baron's Club has finally hired a new waitress! Shelly takes over for Cassie today because the producers didn't feel like paying Cassie to wear a skimpy red dress and say "Are you ready to order?"

- And did anybody notice that when Mandy came to JR's office, as Sly was walking out, Mandy was giving her kind of a weird look? I knew it! I knew it! Back in Episode 211, when Mandy came to Ewing Oil looking for JR, she found Sly there all alone. I'm absolutely convinced that after the cameras were dropped, they shared an afternoon of passionate uninhibited lust. You can take it to the bank.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- Ray's signing was ridiculous! He can't remember how to sign the phrase "you're welcome", so he asks the kids. They tell him. He then touches his mouth and proceeds to say the words "you're welcome". Geez Ray, did you really need a translator for that one? I know. Absolutely ridiculous.

- Should Ray really allow children (let alone children with Downs Syndrome) ride around in the back of his station wagon without a seat belt? This seems quite hazardous. Well, he has a reputation to maintain as a redneck. Good point.

- Pam and Mark's gift to John Ross is an abomination. Its a monstrosity! It seems rather presumptuous of them to purchase such a large and, in my opinion, incredibly tacky gift. Couldn't they have got him a tee-shirt or something?
"My aunt Pam got kidnapped in Colombia and all I got was this lousy T-shirt"! I love it! But it was better than the jobber gift that Charlie got. Earrings? That's original. Must have been Mark's idea.

- I guess this isn't too serious, but when Pam puts Christopher to bed (right before he tells Mark that he loves him), Pam covers Christopher's nose with his new hat. Now, I may be being slightly paranoid, but this seems to be not such a great idea. Children (especially younger ones like Christopher) really shouldn't have their airways blocked. Agreed. Pam's care for her uggie-wuggie snookums has been lacking since he changed from a cute toddler to an ugly four-year-old.

- If what Alex Garrett needs to tell J.R is so life threateningly important, couldn't he just call J.R from Belgium (or wherever he was going from Geneva). This would seem to be a logical solution. The real reason is because the writers badly need to create some suspense.

- Is it believable that Jamie, in Cliff's absence (which maybe lasted a week, ten days tops), changed the production methods of a multi-million dollar company the size of Barnes-Wentworth? Furthermore would Cliff really be able to notice the effects of Jamie's changes (assuming she actually made any)? Furthermore (yes, two furthermore's!!) what kind of changes might Jamie of made? "Um, could you guys maybe pump the oil faster? Great!!" This was really lame. Agreed.

From AOL Jake:  If they want Jack to be seen far away on the yacht with JR so that he'll pass for Dimitri, why did Angelica make that stupid remark in the limo about Jack passing the test of the photographers who could see through the limo windows (why were they not blacked out anyway?) when he wasn't made up to look older (like he was in the photos of Dimitri), and was dressed in his usual Dallas faux-cowboy drag, etc...??
Well, let's see. I believe the windows were tinted...from the inside, tinted windows look relatively normal. So the photographers could probably see some of the features of Jack's face but not much.

AHN Mike's corner:

- Both Sue Ellen and Pam changed their hair color. Sue Ellen is now frosted blonde and Pam is back to that dark auburn color she goes to every now and then. Has anybody noticed how bad Victoria Principal looks since she returned from the back problems that caused them to have her kidnapped for a few episodes? Her face looks older and harder, even a little puffy. I've noticed that she doesn't look great [being a Pam 'mark' I notice these things.] I also noticed the hair changes, but the characters [and actresses] can change their hair if they want, I guess.

- Speaking of hair, I've been meaning to mention the fact that it doesn't appear that the Big Ramboski ever took a comb or a brush to his hair this entire season. He always looks like he just rolled out of bed. And speaking of rolls, did anybody notice those love handles in the "Jack wears a Speedo" pool scene?
I'm sure most of the ladies were too busy checking out the Ramboski's unit underneath the Speedos. You are right about the hair. The gel budget this season must have been unbelievable.

- When JR rushes out of the hotel lobby, he and an extra are supposed to shake hands and exchange pleasantries. Both parties miss the timing and it looks really stupid as JR is past the guy before the handshake is even over. Yeah. I wasn't too sure what to make of this. Probably an extra who at the last minute thought it would be cool to shake Larry Hagman's hand, and the Hag-man ad-libbed.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Does Matt always conduct business in a hotel?  And does that Rueda character run his "law enforcement office" out of that hotel?  Seems like we never see him in a police station........ Well, he's in his office sometimes. But he seems to be awfully interested in what Senor Cantrell is doing. You're right.

- Alex Garrett calls JR about an important matter on what appears to be a house phone (lobby phone) in some airport or hotel.. Let's assume that he has a calling card and it would work... Would he really talk that kind of important business in public. (This is just like Matt calling JR in the hotel lobby a few episodes back) Good call.

- Did anyone notice that when Jack gives Grace the necklace at lunch, there is only one wine glass on the table (looks like hers)... What about him? Doesn't he have a drink..  (OK this may not be a nit but worth the comment....)
I didn't notice. I'll look again.

- Shouldn't they take attendance when the Woodgrove Kids come back from a field trip? It seemed like they all just got out of the van and left on their own.. some with parents, others just head off to wherever..  Kind of sloppy considering these are special needs kids....This must have been before permission slips. Or maybe Southfork doesn't count as a field trip. Strange, but then again, it's the Krebbses we're talking about here.

AHN Jake's corner:

- When Jack and Grace are at the restaurant, Grace wants to order, but Jack says he's in no hurry.  If the lady wants to order, let her order.  With the luck you're having with women, Jack, you better be nice...LOL! Agreed.

- When Pam gives Charlie some earrings, Charlie remarks, "How did you know I wanted earrings?"  Well, let's see Charlie: because you're a girl, and girls like earrings! Good call. Not to be chauvinistic, though, but young girls Charlie's age are typically crazy about them..

- Why does Christopher never cry for his dad?  I know he's little, but he was very attached to his dad.  Could have been an interesting sub-plot for a while (better than some of the crap they've given us).  And now he's telling Mark (a man he's only known a few months) he loves him.  Ugh!
Agreed. Now that you've reminded me, the way he blubbers over Pam in a few seasons makes me sick.

- Doesn't Mark know when to leave? Pam was talking to Christopher, and he didn't even have the respect to let them have some time alone.  Boy, he is selfish. Strike two against Mark.

- Jamie comments on how Cliff reads the reports really slow, and how's there's speed-reading classes in Dallas.  Is she crazy?  He was reading those reports faster than I've ever seen anyone -- three seconds, he's done!
She's just impatient. This is weird, though.

- Nicholas's demonstration of the ship exploding was neat and dramatic, but it wasn't really needed.  If other people see it (like the help or others on the beach) they might wonder what's going on.  And I'm also surprised why J.R. or Jack didn't see it.   Nicolas could have just told Angelica the plan, not blown up a rowboat to show her...
Because it looks cool. And someone else also wondered why we didn't see it. Remember that Martinique is 425 square miles in area - that's one-third the size of Rhode Island. There's plenty of isolated areas there. The better question, if they went somewhere isolated, is why they all would have gone off together and left JR and Jack alone. Isn't there the possibility they might do something to disrupt the 'grand plan'?


Episode 215: Masquerade

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Kyle]

- First Nominee
Sue Ellen: (on the phone) ...thanks for the donation.
Jerry: Still raising money for Graison Research?

No, Jerry, she's decided to quit after one dinner party. Besides, she's far to smitten with you to concentrate on work.

- Second Nominee
J.R: I'll see you Saturday at the masquerade ball (or something like that).
Alex Garrett: We will be wearing masks?

No Alex, it's the worst masquerade ball ever!

Oh, boy. We're having some fun today!

- Let's see. Where to begin? Okay, how about Martinique. The very efficient hotel clerk who informs JR about Alex's message did a great job. It's a shame that he didn't get an AREA CODE to go with the phone number. I guess he expects JR to know what city Alex is in. NOTE: Several people are asking what the '011' in the number means. From my overseas travels, I know for a fact that "01" is for an international call, and "1" is the country code for the US or Canada. But after dialing 01 and then 1, you need an area code for sure.

- Pam and Sue Ellen got new hair-dos yesterday. Today Jenna decided to join them. Too bad they couldn't have given her a lobotomy at the same time.

- Ellie and Pam went shopping, did they? Good. It must be nice to shop when you're Ellie - you only have to go to "Sack Dresses 'R' Us". She must have gotten awfully tired going to all of Pam's hangouts. Of course, for real fun, Pam should have gone to Jenna's boutique.

- I've said it before. I will say it again. I will continue to trumpet it from the highest mountain. Ray Krebbs is a neanderthal sub-humanoid uncultured half-breed. He comes in from a hard day's work and sits down at the Southfork table for dinner. In his work clothes. Without taking a shower or even washing his hands. He's lucky JR wasn't there to teach him his role. Remember what he said to Jamie when she first arrived at the ranch about dressing up for dinner? And Jamie didn't look half bad that day. Ray should have been tossed out on his butt.

- Charlie is told by Sue Ellen and Donna that the phone number for Jenna's psychiatrist is in the book next to the phone. Okay, I'll buy that, though I'm not sure that I should. But should the book be open to that very page? Why?

- Pam. Oh, sweet, darling Pam who everyone adores. Have you learned nothing in seven years of being a Ewing? Let me give you a tiny hint: SHUT UP! Everybody doesn't need to know everything about what you do. And that goes double for psychotic rivals who are haunted by ghosts of your dead ex-husband. I slapped my head when you allowed Jenna to provoke you into saying that Bobby loved you too, but that was all right. I understand. But then, instead of leaving the matter be, you continued to tell her all about what happened that fateful night. You and Bobby got engaged. He said it was over with Jenna. He was on his way to tell her. He died. Why didn't you include graphic descriptions of your night of passion? About how good it was to have Bobby in your bed? How many times did you...well, you get the point. Or did you finally come to your senses and realize that that would be somewhat over-the-top? Yikes. You know what? I am officially no longer a Pam acolyte. [You're welcome, Kyle.]

- Jerry Kenderson is a bit confused. He tells Sue Ellen that he thinks he's found the right woman for him but she happens to be 'married'. Uh, no. Sue Ellen is divorced [or at least legally separated] from JR. That would mean that she is NOT married, Jerry. Why doesn't Sue Ellen clarify this?

- This foreshadows one of the things I think I think this week. During all of the arrangements for the masquerade ball, did Angelica run out of money for Grace's mask? She's not wearing one. I think there's a good reason for this, which I will elaborate on later - but it is interesting. NOTE: AHN Jason said that he saw the tape today and she did have a mask. It was a hand held job like what Angelica had.....

AHN Kyle's corner:

- Yes, Barnes Wentworth does have automatic doors! I can't believe it! Revolving doors are okay but come on, automatic? That's silly. Furthermore, it's not like Barnes-Wentworth is in the lobby, it's at least a few stories up (probably at the top). Attention Kmart shoppers... I didn't notice this. I'll look again.

- Did I miss something about Ray and Donna's "new" house. Last I saw, Ray was tearing it down. I know their house got flooded and then they moved to Southfork, but I don't remember hearing anything about the new place.
We haven't heard about it. I think it's Ray's excuse to mooch off Ellie and the other Ewings.

- Angelica played the James Bondesque villain to a T today. I love it when the evil person reveals their nefarious plot in a public forum. Although when Angelica says to Grace (her partner in crime no less) "When he dies, in the yacht" I had to laugh. That's the most blatant example of cabbageing I've seen in a long time.
Yeah, it was pretty blatant but it serves to turn Grace's mind.

- The crossbow was pretty cool, but really, wouldn't a gun (maybe a sniper rifle) have been a lot more effective to kill Jack? I think so. Agreed. I think the crossbow was easier to assimilate into the costume, though. And that guitarist sold the bump pretty well.

AHN Jake's corner:

- Sue Ellen's hair color has gotten much lighter in color since yesterday. She must have dyed it.  Not only a new hairstyle, but after a few days, a new hair color. She must have found Leslie Stewart's secret stash.

- When J.R. was on the phone with the lawyer who used to work for Marinos Shipping, he wasn't being very careful.  He was talking quite loudly, in fact. If I were J.R., I would have whispered or used a phone from town. Agreed.

- Jamie says she's been back to work for some time.  Does she use a different calendar than we do?  She just got out of the hospital about a week and a half ago.   Back to work for some time?  I don't think so.
It's iffy...okay. I'll buy it.

- When Charlie gets up, Sue Ellen and Donna tell her it's not morning anymore.  I don't think such an active girl as Charlie would be getting up at noon...
If she was anything like me at her age, noon is early on Saturday. It is still early for me on Saturday.

- Angelica is sure conspicuous!  Standing right next to J.R., she glances up at the shooter.  Then J.R. notices and gets out of the way.  Did Angelica hire this man to kill J.R.?  If she did, she would have been better off not to keep looking at him.   And if she didn't hire him...well, I guess I'll see tomorrow. Oh, she did...but Jack was the target, right? Stupid of her to look, though.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- Jackie really pisses me off -- I know that if she worked for me as a secretary, she would have been fired a long time ago for her incompetence; and it surprises me that Cliff still keeps her on, since Pam got her the job to begin with and now Pam's gone from Barnes-Wentworth.  Today's Jackie blunder: When Pam strolls into the Barnes Wentworth offices (which have been redecorated again, I see), Jackie buzzes Cliff to tell him his sister's here, to which Cliff replies, "You're kidding!"  So far so good, but before Cliff can say anything else (such as, "Send her in" or "Wait a minute" or ANYTHING for that matter), Jackie doesn't wait for her boss's reply.   She just lets go of the button and begins a pleasant chat with Pam.  I swear, if Cliff really wants to get back at J.R., he should just send Jackie to work for Ewing Oil.
I know you hate spoilers, but I'll give you these: first, Jackie becomes a LOT worse as a secretary. Second, eventually she DOES start working at Ewing Oil.

- I understand that Ray and Donna are building a new house of their own, which is why they began living at Southfork for the time being, but isn't their old house "unflooded" by now?  Can't they move back?  Or did they just decide that Southfork is so much nicer than their old cabin that they'd rather stay there? The latter is true. It keeps them around the house so we have to continue to be subjected to this Woodgrove storyline.

- Not a nit, but I found it interesting how the outlandish costumes Angelica picked for J.R. and Jack so well reflects her fashion sense. Yup. Jack looked like a Yeti.

-  Did anyone else get the feeling that something was going to happen to John Ross while he was waiting in Pam's car at SF?  After all, it isn't safe for a child to be at the wheel of a car, whether the car's running or not.  If Patrick Duffy didn't come back, that would have been a decent cliffhanger:  Pam's car rolls out of the driveway and crashes with John Ross still in it, while Jenna loses it completely and she and Pam have a major, life-threatening catfight in the house.  This whole scene seemed completely ominous. Interesting.

- As far back as I can remember, whenever an episode of Dallas gets really exciting, the writers put these really boring scenes from plotlines that no one cares about in between the action (i.e., Sue Ellen's various love affairs, stuff concerning Ray and Donna, anything with Lucy, etc.).  Just when things were really heating up for J.R. and Jack, it cuts to Sue Ellen's dinner with Jerry Kenderson.  I understand that the writers need to fan out the main action, and put minor stuff in between, but this is a major contrast!  I just didn't think Sue Ellen's dinner with Jerry was interesting at all.  Maybe they should have had that thing with Pam, John Ross, and Jenna. Yes. I agree.

AHN Mike's corner:

- I was howling at some of the nits posted on this episode. One thing everybody seemed to overlook: how incredibly stupid was it for Nicholas and then Angelica to pull out guns and attempt to kill Dimitri/Ramboski in front of dozens of witnesses? Sure there was a bit of panic going on but you can't kill somebody with a gun without a silencer in that situation without several people witnessing it. How are Nicholas and Angelica going to take over Marinos Shipping if they're in jail for murder or attempted murder? Ah, there's the rub! And that allows the storyline to continue....Angelica, it seems, got away, but Nicholas did not yet, did he? Things will get very interesting now...and what of Grace?

- Kudos to Miss Ellie for taking a fashion risk. Her usual sack dress featured a ruffled collar when she wore the burgundy model. Yes it did! Must have been the result of the shopping trip with Pam.

- How did the former Marinos lawyer recognize JR at the party before JR recognized him? JR knew what costume he was wearing but not vice versa. And didn't you wonder just briefly if that clown figure between them was going to actually turn out to be a mime planted by Angelica?
I actually didn't think of that...maybe it's JR's goo-goo eyes. :) About the clown figure...yes, that would have been neat, and I hadn't considered it. Interesting,

The return of AHN Todd's corner:

- Aren't JR and Sue Ellen still married?  I think they are just separated, and they have had a custody battle.  You don't need a divorce to have a custody hearing. Why would you have a custody hearing if you're still legally married? Maybe if you're separated. There was talk of divorce, but perhaps it never materialized.

- You were talking about the shooter with the crossbow.  In Ottawa nearly ten years ago, this deranged ex-husband shot and killed his ex wife with a crossbow.  They are fairly easy to get here in Canada, because we don't have the overly relaxed gun happy killer endorsed gun laws like that of the United States.  Maybe Martinique has stricter gun laws for its citizens, and not everyone can get access to firearms so the crossbow was the way to go.  This had more style than when April was killed when everyone was shooting with machine guns....
I thought it looked cool. I don't know why others seemed to think it was lame.

AHN Jason's corner: [rounding out a busy day!]

- Ray's place was set at the table- shrimp cocktail and all...  Kind of strange if they didn't know he would be there for dinner... (You shouldn't leave seafood out for long. Teresa should know this....)
Agreed. She read the script. Good call.

- How the heck was anyone going to tell that Jack was Dimitri under that big mask?   Heck JR could have posed as him.  Only his eyes and mouth were visible... Some people might have been able to tell from the facial features and they way he walked or something.

- Why does Nicholas shoot the bowman before he aims for JR and Jack?  Why not kill the targets first..  He obliviously doesn't care if people see him b/c he tries to get them in the middle of a crowded room.  So why kill his own man first?
Well, we've seen the Marinos Shipping corporate policy for dealing with incompetence...I guess he was worried about his career, as stupid as that sounds. I see your point.


Episode 216: Just Deserts

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter:1

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Jason]:

Jenna's whole lame explanation to Pam about how she thought she was the one who hurt most when Bobby died.

- When Angelica opens the balcony door, weird things happen. Grace's dress feathers go all over the place but for the few moments, the curtains don't wave in the wind.

- Couldn't help noticing that Pam's wearing make-up, her hair is impeccably done, and she doesn't seem a bit tired - at four in the morning! Same for Mark, who doesn't even yawn. Mark is a very sound sleeper, too - his side of the blanket isn't even ruffled! I wish I could sleep this well.

- Why is Pam wearing that leather jacket on both occasions when we see her at Ewing Oil? Is it cold in the office? A stylistic statement? What's up with that?

- When Jenna wanders into the livingroom and looks at the mantle pictures, why is the fire crackling away? There's no one else there. This is an awful waste.

AHN NIS's corner:

- JR talks about involvement in satellite communications. I thought he said on more than one occasion that oil was his only business. Why would Ewing Oil be involved in communications anyway?
I have to think about this a little bit. There might be a good reason.

AHN Jake's corner:

- When Pam was staring out of her window at 4 in the morning, it appeared to be very light outside.  I don't think any streetlight could be this bright...Could be a house light. Hard to tell.

- Angelica isn't very quiet when she's in Grace's room.  The police from Martinique and other international organizations want her for murder, yet she slips into Grace's room and starts talking -- not even that loudly, but if I were her, I'd whisper.
Well, there is that wicked wind blowing through the balcony. Actually, you've made me think of something - why the hell didn't Grace scream or something?

- And speaking of Grace, why didn't she scream?  She knew she was going to be in big trouble, so she could at least try to get out of it and have Angelica caught.
Oh...sorry about that. You thought of that too. Excellent call.

- When Mark drops off John Ross at Southfork, John Ross has a very old and worn piece of luggage.  For a boy who's part of such a rich family, you'd think his mom would be him something nicer!
Maybe that's a really fancy design...I don't know for sure.

- I found it odd that Mark talked to Jenna.  Mark didn't want Pam to go to Southfork so she wouldn't have a run-in with Jenna.  Yet Mark has a run-in with Jenna!
Yeah, Kyle mentioned this. But Jenna wouldn't have any of it and told Mark to know his role.

- When Mark is done his talk to Jenna, she says "Can't you see I'm very busy right now?" and then leaves.  You didn't look busy to me, Jenna.  You were sitting on the patio staring off into space. Real busy...
If she had said it to anyone who mattered, I'd be upset. But I think that I don't mind because it's Mark.

- A couple of episodes ago we saw Miss Ellie moving the couch, saying she wanted it in a new place.  Yet there is the Ewing couch, in the same place it always has been. Hey, you're right! I forgot about that.

- The picture of Lucy & Mitch that Jenna was looking at is new -- just for this scene, most likely.
Yup. John Rettino strikes again.

- I noticed the stairs at Pam's house have changed.  When she was coming down and saw Jenna, the stairs looked very different, not even in the same location.
Or perhaps Pam just got the new mirror put in. Tough call.

- J.R. has an "awakening" after Angelica points the gun at him and tells Sue Ellen he wants to fix their relationship.  How come Sue Ellen never flashed across his mind when Kristin shot him or when Edgar Randolph tried to shoot him?  Actually having someone shoot you (a la Kristin) would probably make your life flash before you.
It's a story. Plain and simple. If JR were really dying, he'd think of his son first, don't you think?

AHN Jason's corner:

- When Mark drops off John Ross, he parks right up close to the ranch.  But he sees Jenna there.  Where is her car?  Did Donna and Sue Ellen take away her keys for skipping her doctor's appointment? Hmm. Good point.

- When Jenna and Ellie talk, they say good night, and it looks kind of light out the kitchen window too... (It does seem darker when Jenna enters the parlor to cry in the next scene but that may have been Mood lighting.....) You're right!

- How the heck did Angelica get into Grace's room?  Aren't there cops swarming the resort?  Nice security...
Good question. I'm sure if anyone can find a way it's her, though. Actually, now that I think about, the cops must think that the immediate threat is over...they figure she's gone in the Marinos jet, right?

- Jenna talks about the last time she speaks to Bobby was when she canceled the wedding..   Wait..  She spoke to him again at the hospital... (and his grave..snicker snicker....)  I am assuming she meant the last time they had a real heart to heart about their marriage plans....
But the hospital room was a dream, right? HAH HAH HAH HAH.

- I liked it when Pam and Jenna hugged and Pam taps her fingers on Jenna's back..   looked really artificial...
It was a nice scene but looked strained. You're right.

- How did JR know the binder that Pam brings in is her proposal for the buyout? He doesn't open it and I am sure it doesn't say  "BUYOUT"  on it... He did open it...bad continuity here. One millisecond it's closed and the next he has it open.

- How did Jenna get into Pam's house?  We don't see her enter or a servant announce her.. She just is there...
An excellent question.

- Jenna mentions a woman she works with at her boutique offered her a job...  Since when has she done anything productive at that boutique? Who would hire a zombiefied emotionally cold person who walks around all day in a trance thinking about her lost love? This is very hard to believe. You are right.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- It's all well and good that both J.R and Jack think that Grace saved their lives, but the fact of the matter is that she didn't. True, she did warn them not to get on the boat, but the effect that had was to actually speed up the killing process. If anything saved their lives it was Angelica's blatant tip-off that was mentioned yesterday. [I suppose you could argue that Grace's action changed the course of events and thus saved lives, but who's got time for that?]
Yeah, this is iffy. I see your point.

- Speaking of which, that Grace fan club sure was short lived. By the way, Grace's death sure was handled indifferently. I think
J.R. summed it up best: "Oh, Jack. I know how much you felt for Grace [half-second pause]. Now let's get the hell out of here."
I will keep the Grace fan club alive, single-handedly if I have to!

- Apparently Grace was shot. So why isn't their any blood, anywhere? Angelica sure does clean up nice.
I don't think she said anything about not shooting her...she just said she had taken steps to remove Grace's gun, that's all. And it was a good clean-up job.

- Oh, the Cartel. I always thought that they were pathetic (as in not in the least bit threatening), but now I think they're inept, to boot. Do they really think that J.R. would buy back (even at 50%) out of the goodness of his heart. Marilee, I can understand (she's probably just looking to score), but the other two... I just don't know what's going on in their heads (apparently neither do the writers).
The cartel is so LAME! These are my favorite moments on the show...when JR does something 'out of the goodness of his heart'. I swear I laughed like a loon when he convinced each of them to take a share in the first place, and then I laughed like a loon again when I saw the look on his face today. This was freakin' priceless!

AHN Joe S's corner:

- Speaking of hair, I see Jenna's hairdo is back to normal.  Unlike Pam and Sue Ellen, she realized the awfulness of her curly hairstyle and fixed it.  Now if she could just do the same about her acting...Agreed.

- A continuity error: When Donna and Ray pull into the parking lot, Donna's window is down more than halfway on the exterior shot of the truck.  However, when it cuts to the inside of the truck, Donna's windows are rolled down less than halfway.
I'll check this. Thanks.

- Maybe it's just me, but right after Jack told Cliff and Jamie, "It's [Dallas] not my town," there was a long pause, during which Cliff gave Jamie a look which seemed to suggest, "Isn't it your line, here?"
It's not just you. I think you're right.

- Speaking of which, if you consider what happens at the end of the season, it's amazing that Pam knew exactly what happened at Lucy's wedding (in imagining Jenna's flashbacks), considering she wasn't there. Maybe it was a psychic dream. Good point.


Episode 217: Nothing's Ever Perfect

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter:2

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [courtesy of AHN Jake]:

Donna: "...we're going to adopt!"
Jenna: "If there's anything I can do, let me know."

What are you going to do, Jenna? Sleep with the judge?

- I'm confused about something. When JR talks to Franklin Horner, he says he wants to make Ewing Oil the biggest independent oil company in Texas. So does that mean it's NOT the biggest? Then who is? And why hasn't JR done everything in his power to mess up this powerful company?

- Ellie frightens me. When she's getting ready for dinner, she tells Clayton, "I was standing there looking at all those dresses...and I didn't see a thing!" I just had to pause the tape and belly-laugh. Does she mean she couldn't find anything other than her sack dresses? How come they don't count all of a sudden?

- When they are discussing the sale agreement, why are JR and Harve sitting in the dark? Certainly an old fuddy-duddy like Harve wouldn't stand for this, even if JR likes it.

- Christopher amazes me. Mark throws him a frisbee and then asks him to throw it back. He says he can't throw that far. He then takes five steps...FIVE steps, and then nearly sends it over Mark's head. What are they feeding this kid?

- Jenna permed her hair again? Why? She was almost starting to look good again.

- The floodlight over Jock's portrait at the office is new - and very cool! I don't know what it is about these scenes with John Ross and JR, but they really strike a chord with me. They sort of remind me of the penultimate scene of next season's cliffhanger, which I think is one of the most awesome scenes ever on the show. For Joe Stanganelli's sake, I will decline further comment on the details. I'll just finish by paraphrasing the immortal words of Eric Cartman: "Today, I learned that Jock Ewing KICKS ASS!" And that's the bottom line.

- I really liked the final scene too. Angelica putting Nicholas on ice rocked. Unlike so many other dramatic scenes on Dallas, this is one where the execution [pun intended] looks real. Just one problem: why is Nicholas unarmed? This does not make sense for a guy who knows Angelica [and presumably others] are potentially out there looking for him.

AHN Mike asked how does Nicholas get released even if he does spill his guts? Did they forget he shot that archer in the balcony and tried to kill JR and Jack. Even in Martinique that has to be murder and attempted murder.
Plea bargain, I guess. They figure that he's not dangerous without Angelica around and he was just acting on orders. It is a bit out of the ordinary though.

AHN Anne pointed out a potential line of the day, because it was so hilarious: "Hey!" --Clayton in response to Ray and Donna adopting. He looked like such a dork! I seriously laughed till I cried. Did you notice that, too? Maybe I missed Clayton so much that everything he does tickles me now. :) Yes I did and I cracked up too! It reminds me of that episode of South Park where Cartman starts laughing uncontrollably at something and then says, "That is so lame!" The way the camera abruptly cut to him and then cut away...it was classic.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- I think I've reached a vital stage in my Mandyholic Anonymous program: acceptance. Mandy's just a pathetic loser today. By that I mean waiting around the house (and phone) for J.R. to call (like a giggly teenager waiting for the captain of the football team to give her a ring). Today's episode also seems to signify the end of her role on the show... Alas, in less than a week, everything old will be new again (so I'm not too worried).
Keep the faith, man! Remember, it all starts over next Friday, and JR will be madly in love with Mandy again. Don't worry. She'll stick around.

- Something about Angelica's murdering Nicholas left me with a strange feeling, but I can't quite put my finger on it... What was the diameter of the hairpin? Did she puncture his heart? Something just doesn't seem quite right... (it was pretty hardcore, though). That was a true mark-out moment! Hardcore barely captures the essence of what happened. It did seem long enough to puncture his heart [though it was quite small in diameter] but I'm sure it must have had some kind of wicked poison to kill him that quickly.

AHN Jake's corner: [a record-setting corner!]

- Ray says "Now I'm finally going to be a daddy."  Let's see Ray: I know your child died in the womb, but you still were a daddy, and you're not really the daddy of an adopted child. I know what you're saying, but let Ray have his fun. It's short-lived, it's totally lame...you can fast forward through it if you want. It's over quickly.

- It seems strange that Cliff is so delighted over Pam's selling to J.R. I know he doesn't want to have to deal with J.R. anymore, but I expected him to become quite angry -- after all, his sister sold 30% of Ewing Oil to his arch-enemy!
I was going to say that this is a tough call...but you are absolutely right! He should be pressuring Pam to sell it to him, not to JR, right? I agree with you 100%.

- Mark seems to be taking the PAM out of Pam.  He talks for her, orders for her, and brainwashes her into getting out of the oil business and sitting at home.  In the long run Pam really wouldn't be happy like this...Also, proposing in front of Christopher was not a very nice thing to do. It's like Pam was pressured to say "yes."
Mark Graison needs to be depushed immediately. Such a damn shame we have to wait until next Thursday before this happens.

- Jerry just walks into Sue Ellen's office without knocking.  If he wants Sue Ellen, he better be on his best behavior!
Yeah, I noticed this, but I think Jerry just hoping to catch Sue Ellen in some stage of undress.

- It doesn't seem like anyone understands about Sue Ellen and what would happen if she moved out.  Both Jerry and Miss Ellie seem to think she could just leave Southfork and take John Ross.  No.  We all understand that once she moved back, both she and J.R. were his parents and she'd didn't have full custody anymore.  Get with it Jerry and Ellie.  All right, so maybe Jerry wouldn't know, but Ellie sure would.
I don't believe [though I could be wrong] that Ellie knows the ramifications of Sue Ellen's return to the ranch. Tough to say.

- When Pam asks where she could go where no one ever heard of Ewing Oil, Mark responds with something like, "Paris, London...most of Europe."  No, you idiot!   Ewing Oil is a very large company and London and Paris are civilized nations, and so is "most of Europe."  They would have heard of Ewing Oil. Try Botswana, Africa.
Good call! How do you say 'Ewing' in Hutu?

- When J.R. comes to Mandy's place, she comments on how she hasn't seen him in a while.   Yes she has.  She saw him just over a week ago before he left to go to Martinique.  She is getting really stupid. Kyle [the ultimate Mandyholic] even agrees with you.

- After J.R. and Pam are done signing the papers of the sale of her shares, he walks into Bobby's office.  All of Pam's stuff is gone!  If she was having a hard time making up her mind about selling, don't you think she'd have only cleaned out her office after she'd signed the papers?
Mark probably convinced her to take everything out. Seriously, though, she only started having second thoughts when she saw the contracts. I'm sure everything's been gone for a while..

- Mark says that hot dogs taste better at the park.  Yeah, the baseball stadium, Mark, not the city park. Strike three on Graison...he's out.

- When Mark orders the hot dogs, Pam says "no onions."  I assume she meant on hers.  Usually they don't put onions on unless you ask. Or maybe Christopher's allergic to them. Who knows? But I see your point...don't you usually have to put your own condiments on the hot dog?

-Mark tells the vendor that they'll be at the bench.  What kind of vendor brings the food to people?  And it seemed like he never came -- how long does it take to make three hot dogs?
Excellent call! I was so caught up in the lameness of this I forgot about him.

- And another thing about the hot dogs: if Mark was so hungry, then why did he only order one?  I order at least 2, and Mark's a big guy -- and he said he was REAL HUNGRY.
He was making it up so he could make an elaborate show of pulling the ring out of the Cracker Jack.

- Donna's low-cut shirt with the collar sticking up was disgusting -- and not her style at all.
Yeah! Did she borrow this from Sue Ellen?

- That Angelica is sure suspicious.  Major authorities are looking for her, yet she walks into a hotel without even covering her face.  The clothes she wears would give her away in an instant, anyway :-) LOL! Great stuff, man.

- Why did Angelica take off her gloves?  After she stabbed Nicholas, she had to wipe her prints off the dagger and then used the gloves like a cloth to open the door when she was leaving.  Just keep them on!
To put Nicholas at ease, I guess...I don't know. And I don't think she was wiping prints off the dagger - she took it with her, right, so why would it matter? The only way to explain Nicholas's quick death is that the dagger was poisoned and she wiped the poison and blood away. I don't know why she didn't put the gloves on to open the door though. That was odd.

- And why did Angelica put the knife back in her hood?  I know it's been cleaned, but it was used to stab someone!  That's disgusting. And when she first came into the room, you couldn't see the dagger in her hood, but when she put it back in, it was as plain as day! This is hardcore, man. That was an awesome way to kill somebody! Very Stone Cold Steve Austin-esque. And she just moved the dagger from one side of her head to the other.

AHN Jason's corner:

- JR and the Marinos lawyer talk about his side deal with Angelica and how he doesn't get his extra 15%...  For some reason I thought it was 20 or 30%  I could be wrong on this one... You are absolutely right! In Episode 208, they agreed on 20%.

- Bad idea Mark to make a joke about not liking Christopher..  Them's fighting words to Pam....

- The "Nicholas Dies" scene is great..  I looked it over carefully and think that it was a large and metallic hat pin that she used.  It was kind of surprising that she was able to use enough force to penetrate his rib cage to reach his heart.  Also if it had a deadly poison on it (which could make sense)  it is wise to wear it as a hair pin?  One scratch on the scalp and no more Tacky outfit meters....  As something Angelica says suggested to me that she killed Grace in a similar manner  (Which would have made sense of the no gun shot sound and lack of blood in Grace's room)  but I believe the police or Jack had said that she was shot.   I think it would have been cool to have Angelica stab her with the pin (or needle?) and no one knows how it happened and THEN reveal it today as she kills Nicholas..
Well, she wiped the poison off before she stuck it in her hair. This was awesome, though, wasn't it? You're right about creating suspense for the modus operandi in Grace's death. And I have a really cool explanation for her being able to reach Nicholas's heart. Check out the things I think I think this week..

- This last one is something I mentioned last season..   Ms Ellie talks about how her family may be leaving her house.....How many bedrooms are there at Southfork? 1) Ellie and Clayton  2) JR  3) Sue Ellen 4) John Ross 5) Jenna 6) Charlie 7) Ray and Donna 8)Christopher's (when he visits)  9) Possibly Bobby's?  10) possibly Lucy's
The house does not look that big!!!!  (Let's not even consider the possibility that Theresa, Paco and Raoul live there.....)
This has been mentioned on several occasions by lots of people. You're right. I'll see if I can look back and tote the number of people who have lived at Southfork at once.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- One thing that bothered me:  Shouldn't there be a witness to the signing of the Ewing Oil buyout deal (other than Harve, who didn't sign the papers anyway)?   Otherwise, can't the buyout be declared null?
You are probably right...in fairness to the writers, they've never bothered with this before, so they're not changing their premise. I'll point it out. Maybe someone knows more than us.

-  In discussing the lack of "dirt" on Jerry Kenderson, he mentions that all he found was that a pledge died in a fraternity prank back while Jerry was in college, for which Mark Graison was suspended.  Wouldn't J.R. want to press on and no more about this?  Even if Jerry wasn't involved, wouldn't it be a good thing to have against Mark Graison to save for a rainy day?
If I remember correctly [and I'm going to be careful not to spoil it here] I believe that this little tidbit is not forgotten. I honestly don't remember how, though.


Episode 218: J.R Rising

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter:2

Bonehead dialogue of the day: Nothing great.

- As almost everyone is pointing out, Ray tells the adoption counselor that Mickey Trotter was his nephew. Not quite, Ray. He was your aunt's son - that would make him your cousin.

- There's a really dumb scene where Jack and Charlie are taking target practice at tin cans. At one point, Charlie takes a shot at four cans and knocks one over. Then Jack takes a shot and suddenly there are only two cans remaining! Did one of them fall over when we weren't looking?

- JR tells Jerry Kenderson that there was a time when he would have had his legs broken for messing around with his wife. When would this have been, JR? By my recollection, there have been five occasions during which Sue Ellen has had a significant extramarital relationship. One of them [Clint Ogden] you didn't know about, so that's okay. In one of them, the guy's legs were already useless [Dusty], so let's let that one be. That leaves three: two with Cliff Barnes and one with Peter Richards. In the case of Peter, you concocted the whole scheme to have him arrested and sent to New York. In the case of Cliff, you first made a mess of his career and then his mother's company. It seems to me, JR, that your modus operandi is to mess the transgressor up financially rather than inflicting physical harm. Maybe this comment is just designed to scare Jerry, but it sounds terribly out of place.

- I'm sure many people will point this out, but few care. When the Krebbses speak to Tony, why does Donna sign to Tony when it's obvious that he can read Ray's lips? This is just stupid.

AHN NIS's corner:

- Ray and Clayton try to convince Jack he can make a lot of money raising horses. He owns already 10% of Ewing Oil-more than raising horses. And he can play all day. Does Ray have a lot of free time after running Southfork?
I know. This is really silly.

- Wonder what JR did with the 600 million the cartel gave him? He had to borrow the 300 million to buy back the investment at 50 cents on the dollar. An outstanding question! Maybe it's for tax sheltering purposes or something.

- Shouldn't Angelica know she needs her passport stamped? She just walks away. Well, if I were her, I wouldn't want to spend too much time around customs officials. But you're right. She should know this - she must travel a lot.

AHN Todd's corner:

- Opening scene with Sue Ellen tending the fire.  How unusual.  I didn't think that rich folk like her would be able to do such dirty work.  I thought the only way that Sue Ellen knew to start a fire was to throw vodka on it! LOL! You're right. Although I bet she got Paco or someone else to start it and then just pretended to look busy.

- That adoption agent lady was weird looking.  Man did she have big glasses!   Anyway, I was quite surprised that this is the first mention since Ray's conviction that he has a criminal record.  Donna said talk to his parole officer... I never recall any instance where the parole officer had phoned, or Ray had gone to visit him.   Usually you have to visit them once a week, but maybe Ray doesn't have to because he is a Ewing. I know. Good calls all around.

- When Jack, Jenna and Charlie were out shooting at the cans, I thought that when Jenna grabbed the gun and said "real funny" in a sort of joking angered way, I thought that she might have turned on Jack and shot him. This would have been funny, 'cause I think that Jenna is still a little bit of a schizo. I would have marked out for that! That would have been cool. Or if she shot Charlie by accident and then went nuts again.

- Jack is supposedly sleeping on that air mattress in the pool.  If he were totally unsuspecting of the impending attack by John Ross and Charlie, he would have totally dropped his glass and drink in the water.  He must have read the script!
Yup. Either that or he has the reflexes of a cat.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- It seems odd that Ray, when speaking to Clayton, replies "yes sir". I guess I've never noticed it before. It just doesn't seem to be consistent with his character (i.e. being a mannerless half-breed, kidding!). Also, Clayton's pretty much his best friend, so one must ask, why? Yeah, I think it's probably an inside joke between them. Or else, Clayton's feeling threatened about his manhood and needs Ray to strengthen him.

- Let me get this straight: it takes Bobby (possibly the most virtuous person on the planet) and Pam months to adopt, so much so that Bobby is forced to purchase a baby (yes I realize is intent was not to purchase a child but rather to show J.R., but that's not really the point). Yet it takes Ray (with a murder conviction, no less) and Donna a mere matter of days to do the same thing. I refuse to accept the fact that mentally challenged children are not adoption-worthy. So what's the deal?
You know, now you've got me upset because you're right. What a gyp for Bobby and Pam. The only explanation I have is that Pam and Bobby wanted an infant, rather than a grown-up child. Infants are obviously much more in demand.

- Furthermore, Tony doesn't really seem to mentally challenged. Yes, he's deaf, but beyond that his retardation seems to be fairly mild. Awfully convenient that way, n'est-ce pas? Yup. I suppose you would have to call him fashion-challenged too.

- I have to ask: what the HELL was Sue Ellen talking about at lunch with Pam and Miss Ellie. Pam's talking about her engagement, and then Sue Ellen goes off on this huge tangent about her raging alcoholism (which, by the way, she seems
to find moderately humorous, lord knows why). I half expected the camera to cut back to Pam and Ellie, mouths agape, shaking their heads in sheer disbelief [a la the kids when Homer beats up the Hamburgler on "The Simpsons"]
I didn't see that episode but I get the idea. Must have had something to do with the Barnes family depush.

- Did anyone else think that Jenna was going to go psycho/berserk/crazy detached robot/murderess style on Jack and Charlie when she was holding that gun? I sure did. Man, that would have been a great cliffhanger: "Yeah...that's really funny" BANG! BANG! BANG!... It would have been great either way. If she shot Charlie by accident and went berserk on Jack again; or she shot the Ramboski and then Angelica stabbed her because she missed her opportunity for revenge.

- By the way, even after (and especially before) J.R and Jack find out about Nicholas' death, they certainly don't seem quite worried enough. Angelica is still on the loose. Jack makes a feeble attempt to make a connection but then gives up: "First Grace, now Nicholas [thoughtful pause]... mmmm, time for lunch..."
Must be the aftereffect of John Ross's shark attack.

- J.R is told, after buying back the Marinos deal, that he has just spent one-third of his line of credit. All right then, let's do the math. One-third of his line of credit (which is one billion) is 333.3 million. Since he bought it back at half the price, we much assume that Ewing Oil paid nearly $700 million for the Marinos deal. These numbers simply don't make sense!!! First of
all, I find it extremely unlikely that J.R would be willing to invest an amount the size of the GDP of some small countries in a venture with a company he has never dealt with before (and lest we forget Angelica's suspicious behavior all
the while). Also, the assumption must be that J.R used a bank loan to obtain the 700 mil, yet Franklin Horner (I think that's his name) nearly goes ballistic when J.R asks for the 1 billion line of credit! There are definitely some inconstancies here.

I understand your point but I don't think that's quite the essence of what happened. Ewing Oil and Marinos made a deal to undertake a joint venture somehow, which was going to be very lucrative for both of them. Marinos Shipping owned the oil tracts, and Ewing Oil had the equipment and know-how to get the oil out. Now, here's the thing: I don't think JR actually gave Marinos Shipping any cash - he just had a commitment to provide know-how and equipment, at whatever cost. And they would split the profits from the sale of the oil. Because of JR's apprehension about Angelica, he 'sold' Ewing Oil's share of the deal to the jobbers, for what amounted to roughly 700 million dollars between the three of them. Let's call it 750 million to make the math easier - that's 250 million each for Marilee, Andy, and Jordan. Each went along with the deal because they figured they stood to make a tidy profit. Let's say...350 million each. Not a bad pick up, right? Spend 250 to get back 100 more. So then the deal went sour and the jobbers got upset. Each of them is out 250 million. Now along comes JR, who offers to take their shares back - for $ 125 million dollars each. JR can easily afford to do this because he knows he'll end up getting a billion dollars back! The key is JR not actually spending as much cash as it might appear on the surface. However, it raises one interesting point - what did JR do with the 750 million dollars that he got from the cartel folks? Where did it go? Certainly there's enough there to pay them back, and keep a cool 375 million on the side.
Somewhere the math does not make sense. On that we can agree.
[Whew! That was a long one.]


AHN Jake's corner:

- I thought it was odd that Mandy told so much about her relationship with J.R. to Dale.  Why would she tell so much to a man who was just trying to hire her?
Maybe they've been friends and now Dale wants to establish a professional relationship.

- The whole thing with "Big Roy" was extremely weird.  When Jerry said something to Sue Ellen like, "No, not with 'Big Roy', with 'Big Me' ", I wanted to turn off the T.V. Jerry never was that great of a character, but I sure liked him better before he got involved with Sue Ellen. OH HELL YEAH. Check out my "I think" column this week.

- When Jenna was out with Jack and Charlie shooting cans, her dress seemed to be very long, thick, and warm.  It's like March or April, and Dallas is a very warm place. She must have been frying! Trying to counteract the frigidity that emanates from her, I would imagine. Or perhaps for the Big Ramboski's sake. It's obvious he's uncomfortable around bare female skin.

- The foster parents of Tony tell the Krebbs they've had Tony for two years. Yet when Ray had to drop off some of the kids a few episodes ago, the guy in charge of the Woodgrove School tells Ray the foster parents have had Tony for one year.
Really? I'll have to check.

- Since when did Jenna know so much about Sue Ellen's relationship with Jerry?  I don't remember Sue Ellen talking that much to Jenna about it - not to mention them talking much at all.
Agreed. But there's no one else around. Ellie and Donna are too busy with the food to care. And besides, it allows us to get a decent look at Jenna in a bathing suit.

- After J.R. orders his "regular", John Ross says he'll have the same. Then J.R. orders ginger ale for John Ross.  O.K., so he can't have a hard drink, but can't the boy choose his own soda? JR must know that ginger ale is his favorite. I guess so, at least.

- John Ross wants things to be like they used to - when Mommy and Daddy were together. Except for the few months after they were re-married, J.R., Sue Ellen, and John Ross were never together and happy at the same time.
I'll have to think about this. You're probably right.

- How come J.R. had to be discreet when he was with Mandy, eating at home? Every date Sue Ellen has with Jerry Kenderson is out at a restaurant. Excellent call! I completely forgot about their 'arrangement'.

- Near the end of the episode, when J.R. wants Sly to reach Alex (or whomever he wanted to talk to), she gets him on the phone very quickly - too quickly.  Ten seconds to call someone across the country?  Plus, Sly probably had to go through Alex's secretary first anyway... Yes. Good call.

AHN Jason's corner:

- Someone said that Jack or JR was wrong to say that Grace saved their lives just because she told them about the yacht trap.  In the same episode as that warning (TUES NIGHT), she also pushed Nicholas's gun out of the way when he tried to shoot them. I consider this saving their lives..
Perhaps they couldn't see that through the mayhem, but you're probably right.

- Jack, Ray and Clayton ride off to see Ray's future building venture.. They just leave their horses and not tied them up..  Is that wise, even on a ranch?
No it is not. This scene was so riddled with homosexual overtones it must have been directed by the big Ramboski. The whole "Yes sir" commentary, and then Ray putting his arms on Clayton's shoulder...sheesh.

- I could be wrong but when Jack is pushing his air chair to the deep end of the pool (to teach John Ross and Charlie to dive), he seems to be walking to the diving board.   Walking...  That would mean the water is what 5 or 6 feet deep..  I am a professional lifeguard..  You NEVER, NEVER, diving in water under 7 or 8 feet.   TOO much danger of paralysis.  If the water is that shallow, why the heck do they have a diving board?  (Someone mentioned this after Kristin's Death, when Cliff jumped in and was standing close to the diving board)

AHN Joe S's corner:

- In the first scene, I thought Sue Ellen's hair looked a bit like Jenna's hairdo (that is, Jenna's normal hairdo -- not her wacko perm). Oh, well.  It's better than her most recent hairstyle.
It seems to change at will. This is stupid.

- Upon close examination, I'm 99% certain that the woman at the adoption agency that Donna and Ray talk to does not have actual lenses in her humongous glasses. Even if you didn't examine closely, it would still be a good bet because I don't think they make lenses that big.

- When Jack and Charlie are resetting the cans to shoot them again, Charlie sets up three cans very close together; so close that they're touching each other.  But when they shoot the cans, the cans are suddenly evenly spaced.
I didn't notice. I was paying attention, too. Thanks.

- When Jenna shoots her can and knocks it down on the second shot, the can just gently falls over.  It doesn't look like it was knocked down with the velocity of a speeding bullet -- more like a crew member threw a pebble at it or something.
Probably because Priscilla is a terrible shot. I have the feeling that all of the special effects were provided by crew members wielding pebbles or strings.

- What the Hell kind of hat is Angelica wearing at the airport?  It looks like a pilot's cap (or beret, as the case may be).  Maybe she got lucky in the cockpit and made it with the pilot. Or maybe she killed him and took his place. Or perhaps she posed as a crew member so as not to arouse suspicion. I can just imagine Angelica serving coffee. Or some passenger getting abusive with her and demanding extra blankets or something and suddenly finding a hatpin in his chest.


Episode 219: Serendipity

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter:2

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [Courtesy of AHN Kyle]

- Jack: "I'm going to the bank to draw up a loan against my 10% of Ewing Oil."
- Clayton: "Hmm."

- Not that I actually care whether the adoption storyline makes sense, but why didn't the stupid adoption counselor say anything about Tony's past experience? Because she thought he was 'over it'? Give me a break, lady, and clean those coke bottles you call spectacles. This is absolutely ridiculous. Any counselor worth their salt would at least warn Ray and Donna that it MIGHT happen.

- Is Chief Rueda eating a burrito? And downing it with wine? That's disgusting.

- Sue Ellen's office bears some scrutiny today. I just realized that Sue Ellen, who is only the head fund-raiser for Graison Research, has a REALLY sweetly furnished office. Luxurious couches, a really nice table, and all that - at a research center that has to resort to holding fund-raisers to raise cash.

- Charlie needs a dress for the dance, right? Okay. I have two problems with this. First of all, why will she have to SHOP for a dress? Are the items at her mother's boutique too expensive? Or does Charlie not qualify for an employee discount?

- My second problem [and I'll save more comments for later] is that the seductive red dress she wears to dinner to tease young, innocent Tony looks perfectly all right to wear to a school dance - especially if her date is the hunk she says he is.

- Jackie has been demoted to Receptionist? Isn't she Cliff's executive secretary? In name, if not in ability?

- And the stupidity from Jackie begins. She gives Cliff the petty cash - which is sitting in an envelope on her desk, plain as day. What is that all about? Is Cliff too cheap to afford a cashbox?

- Ellie is either psychic or has a lot of faith in Teresa. JR asks her if dinner is ready and Ellie says she's sure it is. Well, then why the heck haven't you folks gone to the table already?

- Cassie is amazing. JR has been seated for about ten milliseconds before she brings him his usual bourbon and branch.

- Not a nit, just a comment: on Pam's radio, the pause button is depressed. Pam doesn't strike me as being a tape player - more of a record-spinning wild woman. Maybe it's that fuddy-duddy Mark.

- Angelica is becoming something of a fashion plate - for real. How many berets does she have? Or is this the same one, with the little eagle insignia removed?

- And speaking of the aforementioned Ms. Nero, why did the police officer who signs out her stuff call her "Mrs. Barrett"? Is there any indication that Angelica is married, or is portraying herself as such? If I were her, I would have stuck a hatpin into that chauvinist pig.

- Oh, man! Oh, man! I thought this was going to happen! When Donna and Ray are introducing Tony to John Ross, he asks if Tony is really deaf. Donna signs the questions for Tony to understand and then Ray SAYS "He reads lips a little." Tony turns around to look at him...almost as if he could HEAR him. Now, it's possible that Solomon Smaniotto needs some help in order to get through these scenes...but come on!

- Not only that, but after Tony spills the glass of water, Charlie asks him what grade he is in. Again, Tony looks at Donna for a translation. But how in the world could he have HEARD Charlie ask the question?

From Deranged Clint:

-A minor nit during the Donna/Ray talking to family about Tony scene. Jenna is over in the corner holding a wine (Champagne) glass, taking a drink from it. In the next shot -- Jenna's glass is on the table. In a magic instant, Jenna flashes the glass back into place. Good call.

-What is Angelica a suspect of? Must of been some unknown crime, because the cops let her go real quick after checking her gun permit. Do what? The cop on the street calls her a prime suspect, and then the next time we see her she's being let go. Sloppy. This was very lame.

-I keep on finding Ray/Donna vs. Tony dumb. Ray at the beginning of the basketball court scene is screaming at Tony. Come on you slob, the boy is deaf -- you can scream until your throat falls out, but he ain't going to hear you.
Seriously? I missed this too because this was SO boring.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- What the hell is wrong with Donna (aside from the obvious fact that she's annoying)? She's wearing a freaking tie again! When you wear something That Angelica Nero wouldn't be caught dead in, that's when you know you've got problems!
Agreed.

- Jamie speaks of Cliff being all distraught about J.R owning 60% of Ewing Oil, yet the only scene I remember is when Pam tells Cliff that she's selling (and Cliff really doesn't seem that upset). So we, the viewer, seem to have missed a couple of scenes. What's the deal? Does TNN have something against Ken Kercheval, or is Jamie alluding to some off-screen occurrences? I think we did miss something. It's obvious that the Barnes clan has been terribly depushed the last few episodes, or else the writers just thought up this angle to give them something to do.

- And what about Cliff's manners (or lack thereof)? It's one thing to rip into Mandy when she's all alone, but it's entirely different when she's on a date. And what about when he just sits down at the table? Oh, man. Maybe I'm just being overprotective, though. No, you're right. Whether it's Mandy or Mark Graison, this is just downright rude.

- I have nothing but respect for BBG, but lately, the writers haven't given her much to work with. These kitchen talks with the Ewing children have begun to take the form of Sesame Street morality sessions. I half expect Miss Ellie to break into "it's okay that you like boys, John Ross"...
I never thought of Miss Ellie as Big Bird, but I think you're right. So would that make Tony Elmo?

- I nominate that entire scene between J.R and Marilee as a line of the day candidate (also the scene with Mandy and J.R [more on that later]). When J.R says "I thought you'd like to save his strength for later", I nearly fell down.
Yeah, this was great! And also the zinger about Harry's trainer worried about him being out of the cage. I tell you, the cartel folks are the best jobbers on the show.

- And what of Tony? Seems like he can read everyone's lips except for good old Shalane McCall.
I have a feeling that Tony is absolutely NOT paying attention to Shalane McCall's lips. I got the feeling that Tony believed the only thing missing from this scene was lap dancing and dollar bills stuffed into garter belts.

- Also, I know that John Ross was trying to be nice by talking nice and slow to Tony, but that whole scene had a cruel, humorous aspect to it.
Well, John Ross has led a sheltered life, right? He's probably never been exposed to a deaf person before. This is actually quite realistic because he doesn't know how to deal with it..

AHN Jason's corner:

- Why doesn't Mark tell JR to stay out of Jerry's life while he is telling him to stay away from Pam and himself?  Jerry is his best friend and an obviously too nice guy to handle JR's tactics...
We'll find out soon enough.

- Mark tells Sue Ellen that he will keep her name on the office, yet as she opens the door, it obviously does NOT have her name on the office door.
Yeah, I guess he was speaking figuratively.

- Sue Ellen tells Mark that she is taking some time off, yet she is packing all her stuff.   Seems like she could have been a bit more direct about quitting...
I suppose you're right. She has a habit of this though - I remember once when she planned to move across the hall into her own room and she asked Teresa whether she should take all of her clothes with her, instead of leaving a few of them over.

- Why does Angelica take out her license right in front of the police?  Why not lean over into the passenger side (where her purse was originally) and take it out there so the gun won't show.... Very careless. I agree.

- I liked JR's comment about Sue Ellen going out with Dr Feelgood....  If only that was true, Sue Ellen could add him to her "No commitment" tote board... That was great! It's a shame she never shagged him, but he was so damn BORING!

- I liked it how Donna and Ray say that Tony will have friends his own age at Southfork--John Ross and Charlie...   Let's see.... Tony is 12 or so, John Ross is 7  Charlie is what 15 or so...Surprised he didn't mention 4 year old Christopher..
Christopher only hangs around a little bit. Besides, with Charlie around, I'm sure he'll have all the *friendship* he wants. I see your point, though..

- Ray introduces John Ross as John Ross junior..  Actually he is John Ross #3.. Come on Ray, when will you get these family relationships down? Did he say that? I missed it. Thanks.

- This one goes back a while but when Jack said he was going to sell his share tonight, I remembered something...  Jack told Jamie at the very beginning of the "dream"  AKA right after Bobby was hit in the last episode of last season- that he was going to share his 10% with her. Now he is going to sell and has yet to make good on that promise.  Kind of surprises me b/c he is probably the most moral of the Ewing boys now that Bobby is gone... He wasn't very specific - he just said he would 'take care' of her and not 'forget' her. I remember the implication of sharing.

AHN Jake's corner:

- After the adoption agent tells the Krebbs about Tony's past adoption, they still want to try and adopt him.  Then the adoption agent says, "You still want to?" Well, of course. If they love the child enough to want to adopt him, I'm sure they're going to keep trying. This adoption counselor sucks. She didn't tell them about Tony' past experience, and now this? Stupid.

- Matt Cantrell's mention to the Chief (in Colombia) that he's going to bring the emeralds he's found to Pam and can't wait to see the look of surprise on her face.Why would she be surprised?  She would be happy, yes, but not surprised.  She believed there were emeralds in the mine and expects to get them. She said that but I wonder whether she really believes it. Hard to say.

- After Charlie tells her mom she needs a dress to go to the dance, Jenna tells Ellie she's going to have to give Charlie "that little talk."  I would guess Charlie is around 14, and if she's already showing interest in boys (a great deal of interest), I find it hard to believe she wouldn't already know the facts of life. If she does, then she should know not to wear that red dress around teenage boys or men.

- O.K., so maybe the cop who pulled Angelica over wouldn't recognize her, but I'm sure out of all the people at the station, someone would.  I'm sure her picture has been sent to all the law enforcement agencies in Texas.
No, I disagree. Interpol would know all about her, but why would some traffic cops on state highway 4985763? Generally speaking, such cops wouldn't know about international terrorists or anything like that.

- J.R. says that the guy he hired to look into Jerry was getting sloppy since Mark found out about it.  But later on he calls him up and tells him to look into Mark. Come on, J.R. -- you're the smart one.
Well, McSween is usually very reliable. I guess JR figures a word to the wise is sufficient.

- Also about the investigating: If Mark found out that someone was looking into his past, that means that someone he knew must have told him that a guy was around asking questions. But why would someone willing to give information away about Mark then go and tell Mark what happened? I see your point. I'll have to think about this.

- The whole scene at the dinner table with Tony was very off-key. Sometimes Donna signs when talking, sometimes she speaks and signs.  Make up your mind. The whole thing with Tony has been unbalanced. Agreed. The only redeeming quality I see in Tony is that he knows a hot babe when he sees one. Such a shame he didn't accept Charlie's offer to dance. Oh, to be young again.

- Mandy seems to be wearing the necklace -- or whatever it was J.R. gave her around her neck.  The same one she flushed down the toilet two weeks ago.
Really? I didn't notice. I'll check.
CORRECTION: AHN Joe S pointed out that it was a bracelet that she flushed, not a necklace.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- The opening establishing shot of the Ewing Oil building at the beginning of the episode is exactly the same as one used in either Thursday's or Friday's episode.  I remember from the white truck that says "MANHATTAN" on it that passes in front.   I'll have to check my tapes to verify the episode it's from, though.

- Well, I suppose I was wrong before -- the adoption agency social worker does have lenses in those huge glasses of hers.  I could tell from the light that reflected off of them today. Okay. Maybe she didn't before, though.

- If my memory is correct (unless there was a TNN cut), J.R. never actually pushed Jack to sell his shares of Ewing Oil to him.  In fact, it was Jack who got the idea by himself of possibly selling off his 10% of Ewing Oil when he wanted to leave Dallas.   Nor was it ever mentioned that he was considering selling to Pam. No, it hasn't been brought up until today.

- The cop that pulls over Angelica must be a rookie.  Since when does a cop ask someone to step out of their car for a speeding violation?  And shouldn't he ask for license and registration first thing? I don't know. This was very convoluted.

- Not a nit, just a comment: I know the constant change in hairstyles does get ridiculous every now and then, but I really like Sue Ellen's new hairdo.  And it's certainly better than that monstrosity she had a few episodes ago.
Yes. She looks absolutely beautiful with her hair like that.

- Is it just me, or does the Barnes-Wentworth outer office change every episode, now?
Quite possibly. We only see it once a day, so it's hard to tell.

- I remember earlier in the season I had a nit about the servants calling Ellie "Miss Ellie" instead of "Mrs. Farlow."  Today, Theresa called Ellie "Mrs. Farlow" (in telling her dinner was ready).  I'm glad the servants seem to have learned their manners now, but the writers could at least be consistent. It seems to me that she calls her "Mrs. Farlow" when there's a group of people around or the occasion is more formal, and "Miss Ellie" when they are alone or when there's maybe one or two other family members around. Good point, though.


Episode 220: Thrice in a Lifetime

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 0. [Sad, isn't it?]

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [Courtesy of AHN Anne]

Miss Ellie: "Everything's changing--it's so different."

That's the funny thing about change, isn't it? Always different...

- I was going to make this a trivia question, but I decided it was better as a nit. Did anyone else notice that John Ross and JR, before their little chat about their burgeoning empire, treated themselves to tall cold glasses of "Husky" Cola? Can't the Ewings afford real Coke or Pepsi? Dr. Pepper? Tab? Come on!

- Angelica is more daring than even I imagined! While the reckless mad explosive guy is doing his work, he pauses to put goggles over his eyes while he's attaching an electrical connection. I think it's safe to assume that this must be a particularly dangerous procedure. So why isn't Angelica wearing goggles? Does she really have that much confidence in this guy? Does she know more than he does and knows that he won't blow everything up? Aren't there some insurance issues here? [Kidding about that last one.]

- And speaking of the mad bomber, almost everyone noticed that he didn't reset the pin that sets off the briefcase when he activated the timer. It's possible that there was a cut, or maybe the thing has a safety mechanism of a sort. But it just seemed very odd.

- That stupid adoption counselor either doesn't do her homework or read the wrong report. Today, she repeats Ray's mistake that Mickey Trotter was his nephew, not his cousin. Lame.

AHN Joe Ormata mentioned that once again the receptionists on this show leave a lot to be desired when it comes to their skills.  You must have noticed how Matt was able to walk into J.R.'s office unannounced.  Sort of defeats the purpose of having a receptionist don't you think? Thanks! I missed this at first.

AHN Jason's corner:

- No disrespect to Ben but the man doesn't strike me as the strong type.  He was huffing and puffing all the way through his chat with Ray, Clayton and Jack.. No, he just talks like that...I didn't really see him huffing and puffing, he just has a really breathy voice like Mandy.

- Jamie's plaid jacket doesn't match her red skirt very well... No. It does not.

- Is it wise to give a child soda before bedtime.. especially on what appears to be a school night.   John Ross brings up a big old glass to bed. At least he didn't leave it there to be wasted! I hate when people do that.

- JR tells Sue Ellen that Mandy called his office in yesterday's episode.. I THOUGHT she was the call he received at the Oil Baron's club..  I could be wrong.. (This is admittedly a very small nit) No, you are right. Technically, this is iffy because Mandy probably called the office first and then found him at the Oil Baron's. But I see what you mean.

- Sue Ellen is drinking something in the kitchen at the beginning of the show, when she talks to JR,,  She mentions a nightcap..  I assume non-alcoholic...I assume so too.

AHN Jake's corner:

- When Pam is yelling at Cliff for her treatment of Jamie, she says something like "It's like talking about the weather -- they always complain but never do anything about it."  What can one do about the weather?  Build something in the sky that would prevent snowfall? Well, when you look at the world with Pam's rose-colored glasses...sheesh.

- O.K., so maybe the guy making the bomb for Angelica was crazy, but he asks her about if she remembered her first Fourth of July.  Couldn't he tell from her accent that she was foreign and probably never celebrated a fourth of July?
I think Angelica would have to SAY something before the guy could get a clue about her accent. Actually, as soon as I typed this I realized that Angelica must have said SOMETHING to the guy or he wouldn't know what she wanted - or given her the name of that Mr. Hughes character.

- When John Ross is touring the Krebbs's new house, he asks how many bedrooms will there be.  Donna says four bedroom, and he asks why so many.  Why so many?  John Ross, there must be a lot more at Southfork!
I'm not sure what to make of this. I know what you're saying, and I've just begun to realize what a sheltered life John Ross leads, so he's probably not aware that everyone doesn't live in a huge mansion and have dinner served by maids. On the other hand, he probably figures that Ray and Donna are going to be there all alone. Hard to call.

- I thought that Donna and Ray were putting Tony on the spot by asking him if he wanted to be adopted right in front of John Ross and Charlie (both who would probably like him there).  He might have not really wanted to or had just not yet made up his mind. Interesting point. I hadn't considered that. Of course, if there are any doubts in Tony's mind, I'm sure that all he would have to do is take one look at Charlie and remember her sexy dress from yesterday.

- It seems every time John Ross is done talking to people -- usually his dad -- he says he has to finish his homework.  And it always seems to be at night when he does this.   He must waste a lot of time when he gets home!
Chip off the old block, I bet.

- Angelica seems to have an endless wardrobe.  She came to this country only to kill J.R. and Jack, yet she continues to have new outfits.  She must go shopping during her time off from getting ticked and buying explosives. LOL!

- Just like in many other TV shows, J.R. stopped reading and turned to look at John Ross when he was sleeping.  No one ever looks at anyone when they're awake, but they seem to know when they're asleep. Good point.

- What was J.R. so worried about at episode's end? Was it that the oil wells in the Marinos deal couldn't be uncapped or was it Matt Cantrell stopping by? It might be the former, but he seemed o.k. right after it, and I doubt the later would bother him.   He didn't even seem to want to talk to Sue Ellen, who had something important to say.  There's only one thing important could be, yet he said "can it wait 'till tomorrow?".  He must have been really worried.
I didn't know what to make of this. You're right - it is very confusing.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- When Clayton's looking to hire new workers he says "a hand's no good without a head attached to it".  Now I know what he's TRYING to say (that brawn's no good without brains), but what he ACTUALLY says is rather ridiculous.
Clayton? Ridiculous? You lie! [Just kidding. Of course you're right.]

- I really don't like how J.R says that times are tough economically and then, lo and behold... times ARE tough! I wish they (the writers) would give us some sort of a precursor (like a TV news clip which says that oil prices are falling) as opposed to just having the characters randomly introduce this plot device. That starts with the new season.

- The writers have really dropped the ball with regard to the 700 odd million dollars that J.R seems to have misplaced upon selling his stake in the Marinos deal. If he has the money, than J.R's made a 100% profit on the deal (sold it for 100%, bought it back for 50%). If he doesn't have it, than he's in trouble. So... where's the money? Come on writers, this is a pretty big issue.
Well, he got that big line of credit, and profits are slipping...I'm not sure what to make of that.

- Tony's slipping. He now seems to be anticipating where the voices are coming from, and also he's responding to auditory cues (example: when John Ross speaks to Tony at the Krebbs' Tony turns and looks at him). Very un-deaf like qualities.
Yup. It was just a matter of time. Obviously Solomon Smaniotto is deaf, and the scenes have been rehearsed for his benefit, but we nitpickers don't deal in reality.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- Sue Ellen tells Pam that J.R. is "the only man I've ever really loved."   What about Dusty, Sue Ellen?  Or Clint Ogden??  Or Cliff Barnes, even???   Or do they not count because your relationships with them weren't as interesting to the viewers as your relationship to J.R.? (okay, her relationship(s) with Cliff were good plots, but Cliff wasn't as lame as her other extracurricular lovers). I know. This was really very Sue Ellen-ish, and I don't mean that in a good way. It's shades of her old wishy-washy, "I need JR to love me" days.

- So Matt is going on and on about considering himself a loser for most of his life.   Then Pam tells him, "Well, you're not a loser, anymore." Wait a minute, Pam.  Doesn't that statement imply that you agree with Matt, and he was a loser to begin with?  This is almost as bad as your insult to Jock at the Oil Barons' Ball earlier this season.
I hadn't realized that! That Barnes woman can be really subtle sometimes. I caught the bit at the Oil Baron's ball but this one went right over my head. Thanks.


Episode 221: Hello, Goodbye, Hello

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3.

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [Courtesy of AHN Jason]

Cliff:  What did he (JR) mean-You deserve better?
Jamie: I dunno...  

Geez obviously he was slamming you, Cliffy...

- I know Jason will be a bit ticked for this, but I can't resist one last dig at Clayton here. That big ox can't even count! He tells Ben that they've been married for 3 years. Hmm. As Jason himself mentioned, if you do the math...subtract, carry the two...    they've been married for 2 years and one these was a long long dream.....hmmm...I guess time really does go faster on Dallas.

- Ben Stivers confuses me a little bit. When Clayton comes a-callin', he makes an elaborate show of putting that handkerchief around his neck to hide that somewhat gruesome scar. [It doesn't look too bad - but I hate to think of what would have caused that kind of cut in that place.] Anyway, the point is that the first time we see him in this episode, walking around the stables with Clayton, his scarf looks very lazily tied - like it might slip at any moment. The second time, when he meets Punk it's still loose but not too bad.

- And today, the dumb adoption counselor strikes out. Paul Morgan declares that a Texas statute precludes anyone who's been convicted of a felony from adopting a child. Why didn't the adoption counselor point this out instead of leading the Krebbs clan on? Surely she would know this. Instead of just saying so, she just told them that Ray's conviction would make the proceeding 'difficult'. Difficult and impossible are two very different things.

- Where the heck is Sly? I can see that JR gave Kendall the season off to mourn Bobby, and I know that Pam's left Ewing Oil. But why is Phyllis sitting in Sly's chair and doing Sly's work? This makes zero sense, especially in light of something Phyllis says to JR in Season 13.

- Sue Ellen comes to the office to see JR, and he tells Phyllis she can go home. The reunited couple talks for a bit, then Sue Ellen leaves. Then JR leaves after packing up his things. Suddenly it's dark in the secretaries' area! Did Phyllis turn off all the lights, even though she knew JR and Sue Ellen were still there? Or did Sue Ellen do this on her way out?

- Speaking of the happy couple, during the fund-raiser, Sue Ellen and JR danced the whole time! Shouldn't Sue Ellen be DOING something? Like raising funds?

- As Jason pointed out and I noticed, JR asks Mandy to make him a drink. Then he leaves without even taking it from her. Though I've expressed disgust with Mandy in the past, I thought it was really cruel to leave Mandy her holding it.

AHN Jason's corner

- The portfolio of Mandy was very nice but why not include some nudes or wrapped in sheets shots?  Those would entice JR some more (I would assume). Yes, but they couldn't show it on TV. I think the shots we saw were sufficient enough to make Mandy look like a...well, you know.

- The beef at the fund-raiser looked really rare inside..  Considering this is a fancy restaurant and the people there are supporting a research center for the prevention of blood diseases and viruses, you'd think they would be a bit more careful about the possibility of food poisoning...
Kyle mentioned this too. Right on.

- Clayton talks about how Punk wanted to buy in with him and Ray..  What about Jack?   I thought he was a partner yesterday.. (But then again I am sure he was edited out of a few scenes since the next time we see him he is definitely leaving...)
Possible. I think the producers at this point got wind of the fact that the Ramboski was preparing to leave and so made every effort to depush him.

- NOTE- the freaky adoption lady didn't have her glasses today...Must be awaiting the new coke bottle design.

- Speaking of Angelica, she sure is taking her time getting revenge of JR and Jack..   It's been five episodes since Grace was bumped off.  The adoption lady tells the judge she has been working with the Krebbs for months to adopt Tony and I think they started that process AFTER the Martinique incident.....I know this was to build up suspense but still...
Maybe just to catch JR and Jack off guard...I see your point.

- Possible counternit from Mon. night..  Someone said that the police officer was presumptuous to assume that Angelica was Mrs. Barrett.  It may have been on the forged documentation as such.....
It's possible but I doubt Angelica would do that. First of all, think of where she plans to go. Texas. The deep south. Conservative values still run deep down there [especially since she insists on taking two-lane highways instead of the Interstate]. So I would imagine that some people, on seeing her identifying herself as "Mrs. Barrett", would inevitably ask about her husband, right? She could say she's divorced or something, but I would imagine that Angelica wouldn't do something that would invite questions. Hard to say.

- JR dug into Mark's past and found out he could still be held responsible for the death of the pledge if new evidence surfaced.  JR makes a comment like  "So I can still bring him to court" can anyone tell me how JR can bring him to court for this? He can't press charges on Mark and the detective didn't find any new startling evidence to incriminate Mark. Even if it existed, this happened 20 some odd years ago and the trail would be very cold.... Thanks for reminding me. I noticed this the second time I watched but didn't have my laptop handy so I forgot.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- I thought it was weird that when the waitress handed the menus out to Mark and Pam she said "you may order whatever you like". Gee, thanks! Then again, maybe she was just trying to be funny. As opposed to ordering from a limited menu? I see your point. Then again, it isn't normal serving hours.

- A rare moment of legal insight on the part of the Dallas writers. I think that whole thing about the "statute of limitations" was actually well handled. Yes it was.

- While I don't like the whole Ray/Donna/Tony thing, I do think that the Tony character was well cast (even though he doesn't appear to be deaf occasionally). One question, though: how do you sign "Help! I only have one hour left to live!!"?
LOL! This is great stuff.

AHN Jake's corner:

- Why is Sue Ellen making such a big deal of asking Pam and Mark if she can take J.R. along to the benefit?  They went to the last benefit. That's right...they did. I completely forgot.

- Yesterday Ben asks Clayton why he sold Southern Cross, yet he asks again today and gets about the same answer.  What gives? I don't know. I guess they don't have enough to talk about.

- Sue Ellen only gives J.R. a kiss on the cheek after asking him to escort her to the benefit.  Yesterday she gave him a really full kiss -- now this sissy thing.  I know she gave him that kiss yesterday to show him she was serious about getting back together, but if she really cares for him, she would have given him a real kiss today too.
Well, what about when they were in bed? I'd say that more than makes up for it.

- Why does Ray say about Aunt Lil, "Her phone is ringing"?  Even if she wasn't home or was asleep, the phone would still be on the hook. I just shake my head when Ray and Donna are on the screen.

- Punk wants to rent the whole LBJ hotel for the big party he's throwing for his wife. Not only are people probably already booked in a good amount of the rooms, but I'm not sure if the hotel would do something like that.  Maybe, but rooms are still probably already booked. Well, remember that these folks are AWFULLY rich. I'll think about this.

- I was confused by the whole Graison Research benefit.  It wasn't an auction, but just a dinner where people could gather and donate money...very weird.  And again they had it at the Oil Baron's.
Yes. Very convenient, in a sense - the producers don't have to be new waitresses to come around and serve drinks. And I noticed that Sue Ellen did a lot more dancing than fund raising.

- Why did the guy from England who talked to J.R. come to the benefit?  I doubt he came just to see J.R., but he didn't seem like planning on donating some money until Sue Ellen or J.R. suggested it. Bizarre. Absolutely bizarre.

- Ray says his adoption trial is going to be in Dallas.  No crap.  I know they don't live in Dallas, but is actual murder trial took place in Dallas, so wouldn't this trial naturally be in Dallas? I'm not too sure - Southfork is in Braddock county, so it's possible the trial could be in Dallas. And what happened today was not a 'trial', just a hearing to see whether the Krebbs's petition for adoption should be reconsidered.

- I find it hard to believe Ray would've gotten a hearing so quickly. Usually there are many other people who want one, plus they never give you a hearing so quickly anyway.
I did too. Of course, the producers know they've only got fifty-some-odd television minutes left for this season.

- The adoption judge looked mighty familiar.  Was he the judge for J.R. and Sue Ellen's recent hearing?
Quite possible. I'll check.

- Jack tells Jamie that ever since he lived in Alaska that if he had money he'd get this car (the one he gave to Jamie).  I remember earlier in the season Jack taking Jamie to look for cars, and he wasn't looking at this one.
Wasn't it? It was red, I remember that. Maybe a different model.

- Before you know it, the Krebbs tell Tony he's theirs.  What happened to the scene where the judge handed down his ruling?  A TNN cut or never filmed? You got it. Snip, snip.

- I don't think the gun that Angelica had in this episode was the one she had a few episodes ago.  It looked smaller and of a slightly different color. I'll check that. You're probably right. It would have been better if she had a hatpin.

AHN Mike's corner:

- I'm probably the only one that noticed but the same band with the same geeky guitar player was back for the Graison Research fund-raiser at the Oil Baron's Club. Must be the house band there. Actually, Joe S. noticed it too.

- My wife and I were hooting during the appeal hearing for the Krebbs' adoption. The lawyer says he will prove by revisiting the Mickey Trotter verdict why Donna and Ray would be loving and worthy adoptive parents for Tony. "Yeah", says me, "as long as Tony doesn't ever go into a coma."

AHN Joe S's corner:

- Well, Sue Ellen must have read the script at the party, because she excused herself from J.R. for no given reason.  Wasn't it convenient, however, that she ran into Jerry Kenderson on the way to where she was going?
Very. It looked like she might have been heading to the ladies room or something.

- Today, Ben Stivers called Ellie "Miss Ellie," yet yesterday, when he first met her, he called her Mrs. Farlow and no one told him to call her otherwise.  What gives? Hmm. A tip off, perhaps?

-  The same-episode cabbageing on Sue Ellen's part was awful today.  At the party, as Sue Ellen and J.R. are getting more intimate, Sue Ellen says she wants to go home.  The next scene with them shows the two of them naked, in bed, and kissing each other.  Then, just in case the viewers have no idea what's going on, Sue Ellen says, "When I came into your bed tonight, and we made love...".  Thanks for clearing that up, hon.  I was wondering about that.  Jeez!
Yeah, I noticed that too but for some reason I thought I'd let it go...maybe for the two or three people in the Ukraine who might not have understood what was going on.


Episode 222: Blast from the Past

The Jack Ewing stupid laugh meter: 3.

Bonehead dialogue of the day: [Courtesy of some moronic writer.]

Ellie: "How do you like your coffee?"
Ben: "Black."
Ellie: "Good."

HUH? Remind me never to ask for milk and sugar in my coffee.

As usual, the cliffhanger episode is the most nitpicked of the season. I've organized this a little differently because so many of the nits were submitted multiple times. Here we go...

- I was plumb tuckered out after the first five minutes! Angelica and JR's wild ride provided enough fodder for us. First of all, when Angelica met up with him yesterday, he was leaving Mandy's building - it was nighttime or early evening, definitely after the work day. Now suddenly it's broad daylight. I find it hard to believe that Angelica kept JR waiting in the parking lot all night. AHNs Jason and Kyle both caught this as well.

- Angelica tells JR to 'turn right at the light' as her foremost instruction. We see the car turn right - but there are no traffic lights at this intersection. Hmm.

- And after one more indication to turn, the conversation continues. Then JR turns a few more times, without any direction from Angelica. Guess he read the script - or at least the map. AHN Jake noticed this too.

- And I'd like to know why Angelica chose that particular spot to park her car? It's obviously not very close to the downtown area where JR's usual haunts are, such as the Ewing Building or Mandy's apartment building or the Oil Baron's Club. Did Angelica just want to ensure that they would have a long enough ride so they could have their talk? AHN NIS found this odd as well.

- I ain't much of a gardener, so maybe there is a good reason...but why is Ellie putting a plant with a plastic pot into her soil?  Shouldn't she first remove the plant from the plastic container? AHN Anne assures me that she should.

- Ben suddenly remembers his manners. Yesterday, he calls Ellie "Miss Ellie" when she comes out to the stables. Today, she's become "Mrs. Farlow" again. He must be hanging out with Theresa. AHN Joe noticed this too.

- Almost everyone pointed out that Ben didn't drink a drop of the coffee that Ellie so carefully prepared for him. How rude.

- Although it's a moot point now, I must say that moving into Southfork was a really bad wardrobe move for Tony. Donna's a decent dresser - for herself. But for anyone else...no.

- Not a nit, just a comment: shouldn't there be some music when Jamie walks down the wedding aisle as the maid of honor? There normally is.

- Jackie's at the wedding. Phyllis is at the wedding. Hell, even Jenna is at the wedding. Why isn't Sly at the wedding? What is she doing that's so important? Perhaps she's wherever Kendall is.

- The reverend refers to Mark using his full name, including the middle one. Why does Pam not get the same treatment? He refers to her as "Pamela Barnes Ewing". She has a middle name, which I will not reveal right now since it's a current question on the trivia board. This is very odd. AHN Jason caught this as well.

- When did JR get this high-tech phone with the fancy buttons? This is the first time we've seen it. Of course, it looks really cool when he presses the button to call Harry and the boys into his office to drag Angelica away. AHN Jason noticed it too.

AHN Joe S and Carole Rider both wondered why Ben Stivers was so fascinated with that photo of Gary. I can't comment too much because I don't want to spoil anything for anyone, but those in the know will have something to think about.

Rob Frazier wondered about Jack's car itself. Jack's car had to have been worth -- what? -- $50,000 easy, right? (In 1986, that's a DAMNED expensive car; but that's not the point.) For a REAL expensive car, you'd think the manufacturer would have been able to afford to put an actual LOCK on the trunk!   It was so lame how the Mad Bomber was able to PULL A LEVER and watch the trunk just pop open.  Aren't people who are FILTHY STINKING RICH more likely to put outrageously expensive items in the trunk? Maybe I'm just being silly, but I feel the engineers should have thought of this.  I guess the  auto dealer saw Jack coming -- or maybe he just READ THE SCRIPT!
I think the latter is true. This is an interesting point. Thanks! Although AHN Jason points out that some fancy cars do have such a feature. After all, I think engineers are looking to provide people with comfort, not protect them from mad bombers.

From Deranged Clint:

- There is not a forgery out there that can't be discovered. There is always something that can prove it as a fake. JR is facing hard times but he should be able to hire someone who can prove those documents are fake.
You know what? I think this whole handwriting expertise thing is silly. It's just like in court cases - each side finds experts to prove their point, right? One doctor says one thing, another says the opposite. I'm sure that if JR wanted to, he could find a guy who would declare it a fake.

- The great Ray with Tony and the horse scene. Tony calls the horse Trigger, and Ray turns away and mutters -- "Not Original" -- Ray the boy is deaf, you ogre, you don't have to whisper or mutter to him.

- It was mentioned before, but Jack's car that explodes wasn't the car he originally bought. His original car was like Bobby's.
Yes, I thought so.

The explosives guy's corner:

- This part of the plotline has a lot of holes in it. Because of the multiplicity of submissions, I'll outline the major points:

While I agree that the storyline is full of holes, let me point out a scenario which might make sense.

  1. I can't explain how the guy gets to Pam and Mark's wedding, but let's grant that the wedding is common knowledge and news of it would be printed in the papers. It's not a stretch for someone to realize that Jack Ewing will be there.
  2. He got the valet's job by 'taking care of' the regular valet. Probably messed up the poor guy's car too, or perhaps a hatpin was used.
  3. He hooked the bomb up at the wedding, that much is certain. Here's the key point: you'll notice that when he's checking out Jack's car, he looks at the trunk, not the hood. I think he set the bomb so that it would go off when the trunk was opened.
  4. And this explains the rest. Jack didn't get blown up when he drove home because he probably didn't open the trunk. Jamie got blown up the next day because she opened the trunk to put in Jack's luggage. That's why we don't see her charred body in any of the seats. It wasn't an ignition- or heat-triggered bomb - just a mechanical thing that went off when the trunk was opened.
  5. He knows where Jack lives because he followed him home, most likely. Why he followed him is a very good question. He doesn't need to be there to set off the bomb [if my explanation is correct]. There is the risk he'll be spotted, of course. But he also doesn't know when Jack or someone else is going to open the trunk. How long is he going to wait? A week? A month? I can just imagine the look on his face if Jamie put the suitcases in through the doors somehow and they merrily rode away.

AHN Mike's corner:

- Just wondering, but if Bobby has been in the shower for some 25 episodes, wouldn't he have experienced a case of major "shrinkage" (a la George Costanza). In retrospect, perhaps they should have put the Big Ramboski in the shower, since he could have weathered a shrinkage problem better than Bobby.
Well, if Pam's reaction is to be believed, maybe the big Boboski is immune to it. And actually it's been 31 episodes...the longest season of Dallas.

- Did anyone notice that in the early scenes Larry Hagman appeared in what was either his own own hair or a less full hairpiece than he wore previously? His forehead was much higher and the hair across the middle was thinner and sticking up.
Kyle noticed that his hair looked much whiter than usual.

- Also, it appeared that JR rushed out of his office at the end and left the two suitcases of money in there to be blown to bits.
Yes, he must have. Of course, he didn't know they were going to be blown to bits.

AHN NIS's corner:

- Looks like JR has very dirty windows-the passenger one at least is filthy. Seems un-JR-ish. Maybe that's why he had his rolled down. Wouldn't there be more street noise when JR and Angelica are talking? And why did she park her car there? Seems like she would be unfamiliar with Dallas to park in such an out of the way location.
I caught this last point. It's very convenient that she parked far enough away for them to have their long talk.

- Ewing magic computers-JR pushes some key in the lower left of the keyboard to change the display. Good call.

- I'm curious as to why Ewing Oil doesn't occupy the top floors of THEIR building. Good question.

AHN Jason's corner:

- There are a whole bunch of new photos on the mantel of the fireplace..Gary, JR and (on the other side of the mantle what looks like Sue Ellen and a couple of other shots..)   I didn't see Lucy and Mitch's but I couldn't be sure.  At least the "Bobby Shot" that has been floating around all season is still there...PS   it is so nice that Ellie has pictures of 'her' boys..  Gary, Bobby and JR and none of Ray..  Nice way to make him feel at home....
John Rettino the propmaster strikes again.

- Just a note..  It looks like Ray and Donna have officially adopted Tony so that means they need a new bedroom at Southfork...  (We may have a tie here...) We've hit the big eleven! Good call. For details, see the tote board..

- Pam sure slept in late; it's got to be 11:30 at least when she wakes up. Granted she certainly had a lot of dreams .......
Yes. At least this is internally consistent, if stupid.

- Sue Ellen says she and JR have been married for 14 years..  When did they first get married..  early 70's...  it is 1986 in this episode...  (at least by air date although in Dallas time it is 1985)
September 15, 1970 was the date of their first wedding. Something is absolutely wrong here.

- When Jack comes out to Jamie's car and sees the horrific fire, I couldn't help but notice that you can see the steering wheel, the front seat, but no body..  You'd think you'd see something.. or they should have shot it at a different angle..
Agreed. I noticed that too but forgot to point it out.

AHN Jake's corner:

- J.R. is a very smart businessman, and I find it hard to believe that without Angelica's help he couldn't uncap those wells and would lose the company.  He should have been able to come up with something on his own.
Well, he had nothing legal. Obviously Angelica has papers indicating that she's in charge of Marinos Shipping and what not, and can overturn Alex's decisions.

- Is J.R. some sort of junior jeweler?  He looked might weird looking at that diamond with the magnifying glass stuck in his eye socket.  Like he would be able to tell high-quality diamonds, anyway. Agreed.

- I remember J.R. buying Sue Ellen a truckload of flowers at the end of the 1982-1983 season, when he was trying to win her back after their divorce. She didn't comment then that there were too many...why now?
Maybe after working as a fund-raiser she's become more money-conscious.

- I'm confused.  Did J.R. just think of getting Sue Ellen this ring or did he notice hers was gone?  And how long did he know it was gone?  Or did she tell him when it was stolen?
This is very confusing. It'll be interesting to see whether Sue Ellen has her NEW ring tomorrow, or her old one back.

- When Tony is petting his new horse, Ray says, "Looks like you've made friends."  No, Ray, it looks like he's petting a horse.  I think it's too soon for the boy and the horse to develop a special bond.
I'm so glad this thing is going to be over for good.

- Why is Angelica staying at a big hotel?  Someone in the city's got to recognize the woman!
You would think so.

- J.R. says the building where Ewing Oil is located will be closed on Sunday.  O.K., so Ewing Oil and most of the other businesses will be closed, but I'm sure there'll be a few people in the building.
Maybe the security guards [snicker, snicker...the Ewings are awfully lax about security.]

- Either Donna or Ray says something about how the others kids (I assume the kids at Southfork) will have a hard time communicating with Tony because they can't do sign language.  Remember, he can lip read!
I think she might have meant the kids who were going to be at the wedding - though I didn't see too many. You might be right. And you're sure right that he can lip read.

- At whose house did Pam and Mark's wedding take place?  It definitely wasn't Pam's house, and I don't think it was Mark's.
I have no idea. Maybe the explosive guy's house! After all, how else would he know where to be?

- Why does Jamie want to show Cliff Sue Ellen's ring?  Doesn't she know he doesn't want to see it and that he doesn't care?
You do. I do. The whole audience does. Jamie does not.

- The preacher says something like "Very good," after he asked if anyone objected to wedding.  I always thought it was "very well." He said 'very well' at the beginning of his shpiel. This is weird.

- Before we cut to J.R. waiting at Ewing Oil for Angelica to show up, we see a shot of the building - with people walking in and out. Did we? Good call!

- Why did Angelica tell J.R. "it's too late!"?  If she wanted Jack to die, she should have kept her mouth shut.
Well, she also wanted JR to die. You're right about keeping her mouth shut, though, unless she wanted to cut a deal with him. This was very sloppy of her - not figuring JR might pull something like having cops around.

AHN Kyle's corner:

- And what of this Saddletree business (aside from the stupid name)? Why does Jack make such an elaborate deal about not selling his stake but rather giving it away? I know he's trying to be noble (in his awkward, Ramboski-esque way), but why not just sell it to them? Its not like they're starved for cash... Well, maybe Clayton is. I know what you're saying though.

- BTW, let's be perfectly honest, Tony was not retarded at all. In fact, after that final conversation with Ray, I think he might even be smarter than that half-breed (kidding!).
If you hadn't said so, I wouldn't have guessed you were kidding.

- And although I found the adoption plotline deplorable, I have to admit it was mighty touching when Tony calls Ray "Dad".
You liked that? It was kind of touching...in a weird sort of way.

- Not that I expected this to be accurate, but the briefcase bomb, which is supposed to have a 7 minute timer, goes off after about 3 minutes.
Yes. Understandable from a real-world point of view, but we don't deal in reality.

- The first time I saw the explosion of the Ewing office I thought "cool". My second thought was "something's not quite right". Fortunately, I taped the episode. If you pause the tape, and then slow the frame rate to "1/30" you can see that a couple of frames have been omitted from the explosion. It shows the Ewing window just before explosion and then it jumps ahead to the point where the windows have already exploded outwards. (Frustrating to explain, better if you try it yourself).
I think I understand what you mean. This probably happened during the original filming.

AHN Joe S's corner:

- This one's kind of iffy, but when Ben enters the Southfork house with Miss Ellie, he is holding a piece of paper.  Yet when the shot becomes interior and shows them entering, Ben's paper is in his back pocket.
I'll look at this again.

- On the establishing shot for Mark and Pam's wedding, the car pulling into the wedding that the camera is following as foreign plates.  Did Mark invite some friends from South of the Border?  Maybe Chief Rueda dropped by!
I didn't notice. Thanks.

- I don't dislike Clayton, but you're right -- he is a dumb ox!  Just when Ray and Donna begin to kiss and become intimately close at the wedding, Clayton comes right up to them and says, "I've lost Ellie already."  Is it any wonder that they ignore him?  At least he [eventually] got the hint and left, though.
Another one for the OX-files.

- I didn't double-check this, so I may be wrong, but when J.R. slips the new engagement ring on Sue Ellen's finger, I believe he puts it on her ring finger (the fourth one), and it appears to be a perfect fit. Yet when Sue Ellen is showing off the ring at the wedding, she has it on her middle finger.
I thought I saw something like this too but figured it was just a weird angle or something. I'll check.

- Earlier this season, it was established that the pictures above the mantle at Jack's place were of a lake that he particularly enjoyed fishing and otherwise spending time at.   Therefore, it is fairly safe to assume he supplied the pictures, and the pictures didn't come with the place (otherwise, it would have been one Hell of a coincidence that he found a place prefurnished with pictures of his favorite lake, and he happened to be there when Jamie had her accident).  So why doesn't he pack these pictures and take them with him when he is leaving his place for good (the pictures can be seen quite distinctly above the mantle in his final scene with Jamie)? Good call!


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